Love was in the air on Valentine's weekend and I was desperate to pick up a divorced soccer mom. Church seemed like the perfect place to go: Hundreds of lonely women on their knees, mouth open, eyes closed, and begging for attention. I don't think the pastor liked the cards I was passing out that said "If Jesus is touching you but can't seem to find the right spot, call me."

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Comment by Prog Rock Girl on February 15, 2011 at 2:32pm
It's obviously a joke. And most jokes that offend absolutely no one are kind of boring.
Comment by Lindsey S. on February 13, 2011 at 8:15pm

Well, if Jesus could find the right spot, theists wouldn't be so damn uptight all the time. There's a reason fundamentalists are so obsessed with other people's sex lives.

Comment by Alona Naga on February 13, 2011 at 1:46pm
Epic
Comment by Shannon on February 13, 2011 at 12:49pm
You're sick.. Love it.

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