I have this friend who I love dearly.  And she's pretty Christian.  We have a lot in common otherwise - we're both moms through adoption to three year old train enthusiasts (hers is a boy, mine is a girl).  We're both liberal Democrats, pro-choice feminists, supportive of the LGBT community, mouthy and smart. 

 

But she's a serious Christian.  Not a fundie like my brother and his wife, but she belongs to an Evangelical church and she is serious about it.  We rarely talk about religion, and when we do, it's that joking/serious kind of thing.  Like when she invited us to her daughter's christening, and I said we'd be at the party afterward, but we weren't comfortable coming to church.  She said "I swear, I will get you to come to church with me before the end of the year!" and I said "HA!  Don't hold your breath!"  That was almost two years ago.  I'm still holding out.

 

I know she prays for me.  I keep telling myself that it won't hurt me to be prayed for, but it will help her feel better, so I shouldn't say anything.  But I feel vaguely affronted by her prayer.  Like I'm not good enough or something.  Like she feels like I'm broken.  I really need to get over it and just be glad that we can have a friendship that mostly transcends those major belief systems.  I mean, I have feelings that are just as strong about my non-belief, I just don't talk about them to my imaginary friends. 

 

What are your thoughts about people praying for you?

Views: 7

Tags: friendship

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Comment by El Solo Lobo on May 23, 2011 at 5:55pm
My mom died in 1999. I still don't know where she is buried or IF she is buried, because I didn't go to the funeral. I didn't trust myself to maintain restraint in the face such a gob of Goddiness.
Comment by dr kellie on May 23, 2011 at 4:56pm
I find it irritating and silly at the same time.  Stuff like that is the reason I avoid wedding and funerals like the plague.  When my gf died a few years ago, I got the "pray for you" garbage constantly.  I know that people mean well, but still.
Comment by booklover on May 23, 2011 at 4:14pm
I broke-up with my best friend years and years ago when she became a fundie because I just couldn't stand the stupid.  If your friend can respect you and everything is fine between you I'd keep the friendship.  If she says something like that again I would seriously tell her that is disrespectful.  Like, would you come out and say you think she's an idiot for believing that crap?  It just seems like it's always 'okay' for believers to tease you about not believing, but the same doesn't fly for Atheists to tease believers for having an invisible friend...
Comment by roland707 on May 23, 2011 at 8:50am

Sounds like you and your friend don't really have a problem. I've got a few like that. They believe and they know I don't, but it's OK. She could have that same feeling that you think something's wrong with her for believing.

As far as someone praying for me, I'm like you. I put that in the 'If it makes you feel better' category. In the past few years I've had some tragedies happen and people at work will mention putting us on their 'prayer board' or 'prayer circle' or whatever. I think it's the only way they know to communicate their concern. I just say something like "OK, thanks" and go on. 

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