I really haven't had much to say here. Sometimes it seems like there's so many social networking sites it's almost impossible to keep all the passwords straight and breaking into a new one seems like a lot of work. Today however I have things to talk about that are most appropriate in a theist-free zone.

Last night I had a dream that some of my best atheist friends changed their minds and started believing in g0d. It was extremely uncomfortable. I think it all ties in with some recent events in my family/life that have really made me feel like my house is a lone island of sanity in a sea of crazy.

My mom has terminal lung cancer for one thing. She's kind of a salad bar christian normally but since her diagnosis she's been really laying it on. I get that she is scared and all but ... I find it hard to be around her when she goes on about religion in any form. I'd be much more content to let it drop and enjoy whatever time we have left. It's hard for me to listen to her talk about and study something I'm pretty phucking sure isn't real. As far as I'm concerned she might as well be taking distance classes from Hogwarts for all the good it's going to do.

Of course she and everyone else are praying. She thanked g0d after her recent MRI revealed that her tumor has shrunk and I want to call her doctor up and tell him, "Oh I guess you're fired - g0d shrunk the tumor. The chemo and pharmacy of pills she's on? Don't need 'em. Praise the l0rd."

I've gone to her church a few times and was not impressed. The pastor gave one sermon that particularly irked me - "you LOSE without g0d in your life!" - and going on and on about how people who reject Jesus have no 'rock' to anchor them in the 'storms of life' and basically saying that bad things happen to people without Jesus. It reminded me of the sermons I heard as a kid about Jesus being the only way and really believing them...and the mad scramble for coping skills when I put two and two together and started realizing (it's a process) that neither jesus nor g0d are real.

I don't know why I put myself through that crap. I want to make mom happy I guess. As it is I can't get away from religion in my family. It recently came out that my favorite uncle is an atheist and my favorite aunt (I knew there was a reason I liked these people) falls more into the catagory of 'general skeptic.' Including my sister and myself that makes four confirmed nontheists in our considerably large family.

There's quite a diversity of beliefs in our family. We have one buddhist, a handfull of pentecostals, catholics and the rest are a random assortment...mostly evangelical type denominations... *shame*

Then there's the gay right's ordinance in Anchorage. The main and as far as I can tell the ONLY reason some folks want to stop a ban on discrimination based on sexual orientation are their religious beliefs! That and good old fashioned redneck fear of gay people. I can't stand that people, Alaskans no less, are so blatantly trying to make their religious beliefs into law. Hello! Have we ever seen a theocracy full of happy, liberated people? Noooo!

It all gets under my skin and makes me want to tear my eyes out. People are phucking idiots.

-Tak

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