Some of this will be actual chronological storytelling and some of it may or may not be filling in the gaps. 

If you want to read the first part go here!


I want to clarify my feelings on how my parents reacted so no one falsely judges them. I at least want to do them the justice they deserve because I was a little rushed in writing and didn't include some things. 

My father was not part of the conversation that led to me being thrown out of my parent's home. It was all my mother. I have never seen her rage the way she did and did not expect her to. I had always thought my parents were level headed for the most part. They were Mormon but they weren't stereotypical "Super Mormons" as I like to call them. They went to church every week and participated in events but they also had their own opinions. I expected them to be cool about this from a tolerance standpoint and after the fact I asked my father why he didn't intervene because while he wasn't part of the conversation, he was on the other end of our small house and could hear it. He didn't feel as though I did anything wrong and I explained my case very well. Though he couldn't explain why he didn't get involved.

My father isn't a stupid or ignorant man (for the most part) and I thought my mother wasn't before this happened. My father however does have some opinions I find morally objectionable but all and all he is reasonable. I really can't say too many bad things about him, because for the most part I am turning into him. I look almost like him except he is 6'8" & I am 6'2" and I have some Mexican blood in me. We also think much the same way except that I am more calm, collected and diplomatic. He has some anger issues to say the least and he has since apologized for how he treated me (I was the Middle kid, so I caught the brunt of his anger). He was beaten by his father when he was growing up and had a terrible childhood, so all in all he did way better. At least he only verbally abused me.

My mother on the other hand is a school teacher and I expected her to be much more understanding. I continue to debate with her to this day and continue to lose respect for her. My parents are still together. 

My mother is probably the reason I turned out so well in fact. She was actually the one who taught me to learn. She would read books to me every night when I was young and because of that I actually outperformed my peers in literature related subjects. She taught me how to have an imagination and even instilled the will to learn. I learned Spanish specifically to make her proud of me (and so I could serve a mission for the church in South America, but that a different story. I had a much closer relationship to my mother growing up than my father. And now in my 20's The roles have reversed. My father is the respectable one and my mother shows herself to be ignorant. This saddens me deeply.

Part 2b

When I was living in the camping trailer on my grandparents property, I loved it. I was left alone for the most part. I had a computer that I could use and I could go inside for food and to use the bathroom. The only bad thing is that I didn't really know very many people in the area. I became very lonely, depressed and desperate for human contact.

I literally sat alone for months. Just thinking. Eventually I managed to Get internet and started watching loads of documentaries from

I watched At least 1 or 2 documentaries every day while in that trailer. I learned a lot about the world. My favorite documentary was . I found this to be indispensable in my de-conversion.

During the summer and autumn months of 2009 I stayed in that trailer all alone. Well except when I actually started meeting people (specifically females). (You would be surprised at how many Girls actually are ok dating a man who lives in a camping trailer.) Though none of these relationships had much value. They were short experiences. 

Ironically during the time I was homeless before I lived in the camping trailer, I met a country girl I lived with for some time over near Mcminniville. Staying over at her place I discovered the Colbert Report and the Daily show with Jon Stewart. She absolutely hated that show but I loved it. When I moved into the camping trailer Those shows were pretty much the only thing keeping me sane. My grandparents let me watch it on their TV. This was a pretty important part of my life for a while, watching these shows.

Continuing on... My grandparents lived in Oregon City, so Portland wasn't too far away. Eventually I gathered the courage to visit friends who moved to the city. One of them almost convinced me to join Amway and after going to a few meetings was totally stoked. But later decided against it. I knew I wasn't going to be successful in it.

My Parents eventually realized what they had done to me and offered to pay for a couple college classes. I started going to Clackamas Community College taking BS classes because I had no idea what I wanted to do in life yet.

At the Community College I had some trouble finding people to hang out with. So this is what I did. I found where the Nerds congregated during their spare time and sat near them for a couple days just hanging out BSing around on my laptop and eavesdropping on their conversations. After a while I managed to gain entrance into their group and suddenly I had people that enjoyed seeing me. Which is something I had not had for at least 4 months. 

I went there for 2 terms. During the spring term I actually tried to make contact again with the Mormon church. Not for religious reasons. My sister stayed in the house at my Grandparents house going to the same community college. She was very active in the Single's Ward (literally a Congregation for all the Single Mormons in the area so they can meet and make more Mormon Babies). I did things like play Dodge-ball and go to dinners with the Mormon church (but only because it was free) and Dodge-Ball is Friggin' awesome.

Part 2c 

While chillin' at the college I met a Vietnamese Girl named Hắng (Pronounced Hung) who was attending Portland Community college. She was there helping out with an event showing high school seniors the Campus of Clackamas Community College. We got to talking and hit it off. 

After 6 or 7 months of dating we decided to marry (In Vietnam there is no custom that the man has to give the woman an engagement ring, Thank Goodness) We had a small wedding September 3rd in a Mormon Church of all places (Because it was free to do it there). We are now in the process of obtaining her Green Card and down the road will be getting her citizenship.

She Keeps me grounded and gets my head out of the clouds. I'm a bit of a dreamer and have a hard time focusing. You really never know what you need until you have it. She really does complete me. :)

We are very Happy :)

Views: 63


You need to be a member of Atheist Nexus to add comments!

Join Atheist Nexus

Comment by Joshua Francom on April 10, 2012 at 6:18pm

Hang Grew up in a Buddhist culture. She is not religious though. I am able to discuss religious matters but since she didn't grow up in a western world, she has little understanding of how people in western religions tick. She is actually studying to be a Psychology major. So she helps me understand what is going on in a religious persons brain and why they believe. That's helpful.

Actually the topic of religion comes up a lot when I'm talking to her. So much of our English language is derived from the bible and from Muslims (believe it or not) that I usually have to explain where a word came from in order to show its meaning. Though that might just be me talking too much.

That being said she speaks English almost perfectly for a foreigner. 

She Grew up in Hanoi (Vietnam's capital) where she got a very good education because her parents went into debt sending her to the "rich person High School." She probably got a better education than I did.

Comment by ChrisC on April 10, 2012 at 11:30am

Congratulations, it sounds like you're on to a winner! And congratulations on your wedding.

Does Hắng have any religious leanings? Are you able to discuss religious matters with her?

Support Atheist Nexus

Donate Today



Help Nexus When You Buy From Amazon



© 2014   Atheist Nexus. All rights reserved. Admin: Richard Haynes.

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service