It's a blog update from me! Wow! 

Okay, I know no one on here even knows who I am. It's been a very long time since my last post. Therefore, no one is going to jump up and down in joy and rapture (har!) at this little update of mine.

From what I'm able to gather from previous blog posts and comments, when last you heard from me, I was contemplating coming out to my parents about being an atheist and having a hard time dealing with the reactions of my extended family and friends. I'm happy to report that I've handled both now. 

It was New Year's Eve 2008 and I was sitting down with my mom watching a movie with her. My mom loves Lifetime melodramas. The more domestic abuse the better. But this movie was a little different; it was about a Christian mother's difficulty in accepting her son's homosexuality. I casually mentioned to my mom that I often wondered how she and my dad would react if they found out that my sister or I were gay or had changed our religion. 

"Are you?" Mom asked. "Are you gay?" She had every reason to suspect this, I suppose, as I'd never had a boyfriend up to this point. 

"No," I answered. "I'm the other. I'm an atheist. I don't believe in God anymore."

There were the usual reactions I'd expected, like "But you used to believe. You were such a strong Christian," and "Why don't you believe anymore?" It wasn't worth getting into the deeper stuff with her, because my mom has the philosophical depth of a Jell-O Jiggler, but I was able to explain briefly one or two reasons that I couldn't believe anymore.

Then her reaction surprised me: "If that's what makes you happy." And we left it at that. 

My dad didn't find out until about a week later as we were all sitting around chatting. I don't think he really believed it until we were talking to my grandmother on the phone a few weeks later and she brought it up: "I hear Kristi's an atheist now?"

Dad: "That's what she's telling us."

Grandma: "Weird."

Thanks, Grandma.

No one really seems to want to talk about it now. My parents aren't comfortable with me not being religious, that much is obvious to me, but they're not going to let it come between us and for that I'm grateful. I'd expected the worst, but I should have known better. My parents are Bible-beaters, just not rabid ones. 

The one person who's really gotten on my case about it is my uncle. He felt it necessary to tell me that he could no longer follow me on Facebook because of my opinions and that my grandma (the same as mentioned above) wanted nothing to do with me because of the "language" I use on Facebook (my aunt spends a few hours with her on Sundays updating her on family stuff through Facebook). Language, you say? I curse about as much on Facebook as I have in this post. But even so, I'm not going to censor myself for his sake--I'm 27 years old, I have a mind and and will of my own, and dammit, it's my page. I barely know most of my extended family anyway, so if they want to cut ties it'll be no great loss to me.

This same uncle has also taken it upon himself to send me sermons from his pastor, including the hilariously-titled "The Christian Atheist: Believing in God but Living as Though He Doesn't Exist." I don't think he quite gets that there is nothing "Christian" about me anymore, save my name...and there isn't much to be done about that. I'm not interested in applying for a name change, y'know?

Things are pretty good now. I have a boyfriend (!) and we're living in sin in a lovely duplex just outside of town with our two cats. The boyfriend is atheist as well. My parents think he's awesome. I guess I think he's pretty awesome too :)

Oh, also: I'd mentioned some tiffs I'd had with my sister over atheism and the meaning of open-mindedness....as it turns out, she's an atheist now too. Just not out-of-the-closet to anyone but me yet. 

Thanks for reading!

Views: 34

Tags: atheism, coming out, ex-Christian, family, pizza is great, update

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Comment by Jedi Wanderer on December 10, 2011 at 2:34pm

Cool story, thanks for sharing! Especially cool that you managed to convince your sister through rational argumentation. I'm thrilled to hear about whole new generations coming to atheism, even with nothing but Christians in their family history up to now.

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