So I hear you parted the Red Sea to get your people to the promise land right? 

But there is no evidence of you doing this. “Scientists” say natural plate tectonics would have created this sea.

That is bullshit. I believe that you alone created this sea and saved your Jews. You lead them to the promise land.

But what happened to those Jews killed during the Crusades and the Holocaust ehy?

Why were you not able to part the lands so the Romans could not enter the Jewish lands?

Why did you not break down the fences of the concentration camps?

I guess I can forgive you on these ones though, you were probably busy. Someones gotta eat those jelly doughnuts right?

From your dearest bros,

Emicho and Adolf