Coming to Terms

Comment

Comment by Fr33think3r on January 10, 2009 at 12:13pm

It is hard to imagine not being here. I can't love my loved ones. All of my plans, hopes, and dreams are gone. Every thought in my head is not there anymore. They're not anywhere.

It felt freeing to come to terms with the idea of death being permanent. No more uncertainty about if I had the right god or if I was doing it the right way. No opportunity to screw up my eternal reward. My next thought was that millions if not billions of people before me never experienced the same freedom.

Comment by deletedsoul on January 10, 2009 at 12:26am

It is most damaging IMO because it is false hope, and allows for too much complacency in our current lives. Why try to make a positive impact (other than proselytizing) if your true goal is to die and go to heaven? I do feel somewhat cheated, even if it was only myself doing the cheating. There were many years that I could have spent bettering myself instead of trying to "please god". Hopefully now that I am more aware, I can spend my life in a more productive way.

Comment by Creature on January 9, 2009 at 11:54pm

Well, that was the main reason I held on to some sort of a religion for a long time. I think I understand exactly what you're talking about. It was a very difficult thing for me to deal with. I try not to dwell on it because the idea of not existing is so alien that it can be terrifying. I stopped being afraid of death when I realized that it's something I probably won't be aware of. I remind myself of all of the experiences I've forgotten, of the time I lose every night when I sleep and it doesn't seem quite so bad anymore.

Sometimes I think that the promise of immortality that religion gives us is one of the most damaging parts of it.

Comment by deletedsoul on January 9, 2009 at 11:34pm

Well, I do love to sleep so that may not be too bad. :)

Comment by Mike Haynes on January 9, 2009 at 10:19pm

Great topic. I have gone through the same feelings, finally accepting the fact that I could not believe in any type of god or afterlife at all just a year or so ago (after years of bouncing between Deism and Agnosticism). It was like having to say goodbye to my passed-on loved ones all over again, and after that, facing my own mortality.

I have come to terms with my eventual "demise" this way: Some day I will get to sleep in...forever. I won't have to get up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom. I won't be pressing the snooze button for the fifth time and then hurrying like mad to get ready for work. I won't be having to take the dogs out for their routine business on cold January mornings. No more bills and no more taxes. No more worries, period. The list goes on. Until then, I'll make the best of life that I can and look forward to the peaceful "heaven" of non-existence when my time is up.

Comment by Lori Gilliland on January 9, 2009 at 9:29pm

I tell my kids when someone dies they go back to where they came from. You didn't exist before and once you die you will not miss being alive.

It seems to me, people are not necessarily scared of death, but like you we just can't imagine not being alive. I too think about it, but we should not dwell on it.
If you dwell on it too much you will mourn for a future life you will not experience and forget about today.
Your, mine, our delema is being human.

Comment by Adam Johnson on January 9, 2009 at 9:18pm

I think this is excellent to bring up. The way I look at it is that I exist for a finite amount of time. Therefore I have to make the best of what I have and strive to make everyone else's life better. I love to learn so this is key in my existence. The idea is you are only here for a short time. This makes life way more precious. Religious people don't get this sense of urgency or the preciousness of life because they look forward to the afterlife.

You are right to not believe, just appreciate the time you have here and make the best of it. Itwill make you be a better, more compassionate person overall in my opinion.