This morning I got one of those stupid conservative emails from a classmate. She is always sending me crap like this and it's frankly starting to get on my nerves. Unfortunately I don't feel it is 'safe' to respond to it as I'd like. I needed to vent so I'm posting it here. My responses are in bold.
NEW PREAMBLE TO THE CONSTITUTION
This is probably the best e-mail I've seen in a long, long time. The following has been attributed to State Representative Mitchell Kaye from GA. This guy should run for President one day...
"We the sensible people of the United States, in an attempt to help everyone get along, restore some semblance of justice, avoid more riots, keep our nation safe, promote positive behavior, and secure the blessings of debt-free liberty to ourselves and our great-great-great-grandchildren, hereby try one more time to ordain and establish some common sense guidelines for the terminally whiny, guilt ridden, delusional, and other liberal bed-wetter's. We hold these truths to be self evident: that a whole lot of people are confused by the Bill of Rights and are so dim they require a Bill of NON-Rights."
Ad hominem attacks much? I do not hold these truths to be self evident and calling people bed-wetters is not exactly a good way to get them to agree with you.
ARTICLE I: You do not have the right to a new car, big screen TV, or any other form of wealth.. More power to you if you can legally acquire them, but no one is guaranteeing anything.
ARTICLE II: You do not have the right to never be offended.. This country is based on freedom, and that means freedom for everyone -- not just you! You may leave the room, turn the channel, express a different opinion, etc.; but the world is full of idiots, and probably always will be.
Ramen to that.
ARTICLE III: You do not have the right to be free from harm. If you stick a screwdriver in your eye, learn to be more careful; do not expect the tool manufacturer to make you and all your relatives independently wealthy.
This is also fine.
ARTICLE IV: You do not have the right to free food and housing. Americans are the most charitable people to be found, and will gladly help anyone in need, but we are quickly growing weary of subsidizing generation after generation of professional couch potatoes who achieve nothing more than the creation of another generation of professional couch potatoes.
I think this is amusing and while I agree food and housing are not necessarily 'rights' there is no reason that in a prosperous country we should have people starving and homeless. And who is this "we" exactly that is getting tired of this state of affairs? The last generation of professional couch potatoes?
ARTICLE V: You do not have the right to free health care. That would be nice, but from the looks of public housing, we're just not interested in public health care.
Gosh well I guess that means we should just quit trying to bring our standard of living up to par with that of other first world nations.
Instead of focusing on how things don't work why not work together to improve them? When has giving up ever made things better for anyone?
ARTICLE VI: You do not have the right to physically harm other people. If you kidnap, rape, intentionally maim, or kill someone, don't be surprised if the rest of us want to see you fry in the electric chair..
Other than the levitical "eye for an eye" philosophy of this article I don't see a problem here. Does the author mean to imply that we do have the right to harm other people if they've harmed us first? That certainly seems to be the gist of what he's saying here.
ARTICLE VII: You do not have the right to the possessions of others. If you rob, cheat, or coerce away the goods or services of other citizens, don't be surprised if the rest of us get together and lock you away in a place where you still won't have the right to a big screen color TV or a life of leisure.
Seems fine to me.
ARTICLE VIII: You do not have the right to a job. All of us sure want you to have a job, and will gladly help you along in hard times, but we expect you to take advantage of the opportunities of education and vocational training laid before you to make yourself useful. (AMEN!)
Too bad the USA is among the least educated (per capita) of first world nations. Kind of explains a lot. As to the "right" to a job I suppose nobody does have that right but on the other hand not everybody has the means to attain the vocational/educational training to be competitive here in the USA either.
ARTICLE IX: You do not have the right to happiness. Being an American means that you have the right to PURSUE happiness, which by the way, is a lot easier if you are unencumbered by an over abundance of idiotic laws created by those of you who were confused by the Bill of Rights.
Gee, thanks for explaining that one. What laws does this refer to by the way? The laws that might encumber a person's pursuit of happiness that I have encountered do so when that person is gaining their happiness at the expense of other people and/or the environment.
ARTICLE X: This is an English speaking country. We don't care where you are from, English is our language. Learn it or go back to wherever you came from! (Lastly....)
The ignoramus who wrote this email is apparently not aware that the USA has never had and does not have an official language. Historically the USA is a melting pot and our heritage and culture comes from a mixture of many different nationalities who speak many different languages.
ARTICLE XI: You do not have the right to change our country's history or heritage. This country was founded on the belief in one true God. And yet, you are given the freedom to believe in any religion, any faith, or no faith at all; with no fear of persecution The phrase IN GOD WE TRUST is part of our heritage and history, and if you are uncomfortable with it, TOUGH!
The USA was founded because we did not want to remain under the rule of England. It had nothing to do with religion. Those that came on the Mayflower to seek religious freedom did so at the expense of the freedoms and rights of the native people who already lived here.
FYI, "in God we trust" was not added to US currency until the civil war (not exactly 'founding fathers' stuff - it was a response to increased religiosity in the country and is direct endorsement of christianity by our government). The statement we see today, "IN GOD WE TRUST" first appeared on the two cent coin in 1864.
There's a similar story behind the pledge of allegience. "One nation, under god" did not appear in the pledge until President Eisenhower signed it into law on Flag Day of 1954. Some heritage!
For the conservative types who get off on this type of email I'm sure it sounds great to preserve our heritage and right from the start they have tried to keep it that way. If you want to argue the heritage angle you'll also have to agree that we should abolish women's right to vote - a privilege which was originally limited only to land owning white males - and reinstate slavery since those were part of our history and heritage too.
If you agree, share this with a friend. No, you don't have to, and nothing tragic will befall you if you don't. I just think it's about time common sense is allowed to flourish. Sensible people of the United States speak out because if you do not, who will?
No, no I do not agree with this email.