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Another Day in Small-town Arkansas

I just had an experience that I have a strong need to share with whomever feels like reading it. I manage a small business in a very small town. During the average day I deal with all sorts of people. Just a while ago, an older gentleman came in and obviously needed someone to talk to. He stood in my store and had a very normal conversation about his time in the Marine Corp and how different things are with the military today.

The conversation was going on just as any average small-town conversation would until he told me that there was something he needed to tell me. First he asked whether I had seen the movie The Legend of Boggy Creek. I told him that I had seen it, and I knew it supposedly happened in a small town near here. He then leaned closer and told me that he and a friend had seen a bigfoot last week. I responded as politely as I could muster, "OH REALLY?!?" I had to ask, "Did your friend think it was a bigfoot?"

He looked at me completely serious and said, "No, he thinks it was a deer and that I was just too drunk." After he said that came the highlight of my entire day. He looked at me and said, "It was a bigfoot. It was as real as Jesus Christ." I could only respond with well-hidden sarcasm, "WOW!" He then went on to tell me how they have to be real because they are seen around the world. Then came a statement I loved nearly as much as the comment about the reality of Jesus Christ. He said, "They even seen em in the Andes over there around Kilimanjaro." I'm pretty sure he was referring to the Himalayas and Mount Everest, but who knows.

After he left my store, I just had to crack up laughing. But it's sad, this is the type of person religion takes the biggest hold of. Religion is the most dangerous when it comes to the lowest common denominator or our society. There are a lot of people that are not intelligent to differentiate between a metaphor and when he should stone someone. If I had told him I was an atheist, I think this man could've stoned me to death

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Comment by Kitty on May 30, 2009 at 7:33am: As real as Jesus ... see what a chuckle you can get from every day life?
Seriously, your answer was spot on. I do the same. "Really? I don't know what to say!"
Yeah, good idea not telling him you're an atheist, that's not the way to get stoned.

Comment by Mumba C Mumbi on April 18, 2009 at 6:43am: That is really interesting. Around here (Zambia, Africa) there are even more bizarre incidents that sucks in even the whole community or nation. Stupid claims easily find themselves in the hands of superstitious journalists who lay them out to the gullible nation that is only too ready to accept them as "gospel truth". Just last week a cabinet minister said a clause in the draft constitution that says a vice president should take over when the president dies was not good because it would motivate vice presidents to bewitch presidents so that they take over.

Comment by Tak G. on April 16, 2009 at 10:18pm: Too funny. I usually do the same thing as you though, "Oh really? Wow." He would've gone around after that saying how he saw a real atheist.

Comment by Angie Jackson on April 16, 2009 at 3:26pm: Wow, as real as Jesus huh? I think I'm gonna start using that for sarcastic inflection. :)

Comment by Dre Smith on April 16, 2009 at 2:47pm: I thought the Andes were in South America, and Kilamanjaro was in Africa. I don't know how many miles they are apart but it's certainly an ocean apart. I don't know about Jesus being real either, I think its a case of people seeing what they wish to see. I know people that have claimed to see Jesus in a grilled cheese sandwhich doesn't however mean the image is actually Jesus nor placed there by miraculous event either. I know of some of your pain though, I am an atheist here in Virginia the southwest rural side of the state.