When we study science, in particular evolutionary biology, it becomes pretty evident that humans were the result of purposeless and random forces of nature.  We are not what natural selection had in mind because there is no mind. 

So instead of attributing our existence to some patriarchal god, let’s take it for what it is: It just is.  Like the old song says, “Let’s live and laugh at it all.” 

You can lead a hog to a pigsty but you can’t make him stink.  (From the Farmer’s Almanac) 

One good fart deserves another. (Familiar Bulgarian saying)

Let the smeller beware.  (Sign in many police stations) 

A new fart smells clean.  (Bavarian proverb) 

When the czar farts it bursts with pride. (Oft-heard words at the Kremlin)

A smelly fart requires many words. (Mexican proverb)

A stuffy nose smells no farts. (Heard at Scotland Yard)

Your fart’s smell is a good mirror. (Irish saying)

A house without a fart is the house of a scoundrel. (Portuguese proverb)

A man is not fragrant just because he never had a chance to stink.  (Motto of the Motion Picture Academy) 

A penny for your farts.  (From Poor Richard’s Almanac)  

Prudent persons do not leave a fart as their calling card.  (Sound advice to young salespersons) 

A single Russian fart outsmells the Polish nation. (Old Russian saying)

A pig believes everybody farts. (Bedouin adage)

A fart should be smelled from behind. (Swedish proverb)

After smelling the fart of a Turk, check your nose. (Sign in many Athens restaurants)

A fart in Germany is a rose in Rome. (Traditional German proverb)

A fart without a smell is folly. (Latvian lamentation)

Beggars should not blow farts. (Oft-heard admonition on the Bowery)

Better to open a window than curse the smell.  (Sound advice for new prisoners)