There, I’ve said it. Outside of a conversation on breast feeding, nipples seem to be off limits for television. Recently, a television show featuring reconstructive surgery featured breast augmentation among other procedures aired on The Learning Channel. Breasts of all shapes, sizes and colors filled the screen, but in every instance the nipple was blurred out like an obscenity. Folks, it’s a nipple! Once upon a time, we stuck them in babies’ faces to feed the child.
Everyone has a pair, including men. Combined with the rest of the skin in that particular area, they are called breasts on women and pectorals on men. However, I am not against the blurring of nipples or entire breasts in certain cases. If you can tuck your breasts into your belt—they should be blurred. Men, if you’ve got man tits—please blur or see a surgeon. If your cleavage extends more than a foot—blur. If your breasts pull down like old window shades, blurring is in order. It’s not the nipple’s fault.
The one-time flap over the Janet Jackson “breast incident” had news and congressional boobs on the front page making political stupidity while the country foundered in uncertainty about unemployment, the economy, government lies about weapons of mass destruction, deaths of US service men and women in Iraq and the cost of being sick in the greatest country on earth, while the media trots out another boob to berate the “breast” incident.
Is the nipple too provoking for public exposure? Does it send otherwise normal people into an uncontrollable sexual frenzy? What is it about female nipples that cause censors to go into an apocalyptic agitation at the mere mention of exposure? If breasts had no nipples would exposing them become passé?
Who cares? During a normal lifetime, people will view at least two nipples unless there was a birth anomaly, which could place the number at one or three. Counting locker room experiences, most women and men will see at least 10 to 20 pair of breasts in their lifetime. In some cases, the number can jump exponentially if the viewer is a stripper or strip club attendee.
Whether they’re called titties, ta-ta’s, bazoombas, jugs or knockers, they are still nothing but mammary glands covered with skin and tipped with a bumpy dispersal unit. I don’t want to seem like a jug head, but it seems to me that blurring out nipples or breasts only increases the desire to see them, which is why the United States is not far removed from its Puritan heritage despite the so-called sexual revolution.
It is far past time for religious fanatics to “get over it.” I took my first sauna in Frankfurt, Germany many years ago at a coed health club. Being a typical American, I was embarrassed to join with other nude men and women it a small wooden room. Nevertheless, I did it.
Once I entered the sauna, all thoughts of embarrassing engorgement disappeared as the heat literally took my breath away. All around me were nipples galore and I didn’t give one shit. All I wanted was to spend my time and get the hell out so I could breathe again. After that, went there regularly but boobs, butts and beaver lost their allure in that environment. I could even set with women, talk and not embarrass myself.
So, I feel it is my responsibility to start a movement to “free the nipple.”