Last night, I had a vivid dream. It was an emotional dream, and I could feel the effects of the dream when I woke up in the morning. My dream was about the attractiveness, the longing even, to believe in God. It is an incredibly emotional response, and something I know to be the result of so many years of indoctrination that my mind and body still react to.
In my dream, I was attending a funeral for someone — I’m not sure who — and my friends and family were surrounding me at the event. Everyone who was there was all filled with such emotion, such grief, pain, and angst. I was reaching out to hug and console some of them and I could genuinely feel their pain in my chest and heart. My acknowledgement of their pain didn’t seem to suffice, though. My head was telling me that what I was saying wasn’t good enough.There has to be more after death, I said to myself.
I thought to myself that the attendees who were telling my friends and family that this person was in a better place now or that the person was with God must be right — and they must know something that I don’t. I just can’t see it! Why can’t I believe anymore like they do? I so genuinely wanted to believe that this dead person moved on to some mystical and magical place called heaven. It just had to be true. It is an extraordinarily attractive thought, and one that Bible-believers play on constantly. There is more to life. One day, you will join God in Heaven and it is a beautiful place.
Some of you — particularly those who came from religion — might be able to relate to what I am saying. Despite having no concrete evidence aside from overwhelming feelings (appeal to emotion) and a lot believers (appeal to popularity), billions on our planet believe in this stuff. I think this speaks to the level of indoctrination and emotional pull these beliefs have. I am an emotional creature. I love to be loved and give love to others. I still struggle with the emotional pull and attractiveness of these thoughts.