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Burnt Toast: Atheist Sees Image of the 'Birth of Earth' in a Piece of Toast

Atheist Sees Image of the 'Birth of Earth' in Burnt Toast

Yes it’s true.

This genuine picture was photographed in Bradford-on-Avon, Wiltshire, England by science atheist Dr. Terence Meaden earlier this month.

He could barely withhold his excitement.

“I was having breakfast when this piece of ciabatta toast got burnt,” he said. “Suddenly I was aware that the pattern of light and darkness across the toast resembled what could have been a visible manifestation of primeval events at the time that planet Earth was forming four and a half billion years ago.

Genuine unretouched photograph, copyright G.T. Meaden

Physicist and archaeologist Dr. G. Terence Meaden from Oxford University continued, “I feel humbled that I should have been chosen to receive this vision and expression of non-godist reality in this unexpected way. It is plainly a subtle manifestation of the high principle of atheism that goddidnotdoit.”

It is likely to make national headlines as this sensational story spreads through the rationalist community of nonbelievers in godism. Goddidit followers may be unhappy about it though, but after all—if one imitates their sloppy use of the word ‘theory’—“goddidit is only a ‘theory’, seeing that gods are mere constructs of the human mind”.

“It is exciting because this piece of toast was absolutely genuine. No trickery. It happened, just like that”, said Dr. Meaden—a Tommy Cooper fan.

“You can see a representation of the birthing planet taking in asteroid-size spherical fragments as Young Earth spins and grows into the big planet that we know today.”

We may expect the story to go worldwide as non-acceptors of godism take note. “All I can say is you gotta believe this, because it happened. I have always concurred with the scientific truths of the Aged Earth theory because proven scientific facts are right.” Some years ago a worthy atheist* reported an image of burnt toast as depicting the Big Bang, but no photograph was ever produced—so perhaps that account was satirical. Mine is not. I have the picture to prove it.

So can we see the toast, this remarkable vision?

“I’m afraid the photograph is all that remains. The experience so overwhelmed me that, stunned and unthinkingly, I photographed it, buttered it and ate it”. But I do have the negative of the original picture, and the satisfaction of having actually eaten a piece of a nongod.”

* * * * *

* thanks to http://www.satireandcomment.com/0208toast.html where a pictureless image of the Big Bang was reported some years ago.

Tags: Big Bang, Burnt toast, Earth, Goddidit, Goddidnotdoit, Godism, Nongod, Tommy Cooper

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Comment by RonRon on February 26, 2013 at 2:05pm: Lol! Awesome.

Comment by Richard Goscicki on June 27, 2012 at 12:33pm: Great post. How about sending the photo to the Vatican with the note, "Let's see you top this one." We can tell it's a piece of burnt toast without using our imagination.

Comment by Dr. Terence Meaden on January 1, 2012 at 5:43am: Happy New Year everyone.

Just for the record, the number of visits to burnt toast as the year ended was 16,950.

Comment by kfreed on September 8, 2011 at 4:41am: 13,600 views is outstanding. It does help to have a sense of humor.

I suppose my rendition will be about as accidental as Jesus toast.

Comment by Dr. Terence Meaden on September 8, 2011 at 4:30am: To kfreed

Yes, an art project burning toast sounds good.

My toast burning was accidental, while the subsequent wording was 'creative writing'.

I put this blog on to "ORIGINS" and there were 12,000 views in 4 days. The total now is 13,600.

Comment by kfreed on September 8, 2011 at 4:02am: Hmmm... you've just given me an idear for an art project...

Comment by Steph S. on August 26, 2011 at 10:24am: Yes, the big bang is in that toast -- I see it clearly now.

Comment by Jeremy Raines on August 26, 2011 at 7:37am: Mmmmm, toast!

Comment by Atheist Andrea on August 26, 2011 at 5:57am: I once saw an image of Darwin flippin' a bird on a piece of toast but couldn' t find my camera. Could have fetched me thousands on ebay but not as much money as Jesus or Virgin Mary, unfortunately.