Please don't think you are a burden to me, you are not.
I think most peolpe are religious out of a very unflattering motive. That is, although most won't admit it, I think they are religious because of what they hope to receive regardless of whether or not they must abandoned their consciences. I think they, independently from duress and in a calculated manner, have chosen selfishness over love. Because they are in the majority they feel safe in their decisions. However, what they have lost is their self-respect.
One of my very favorite songs is Danny boy which, as you know, is about a father's love for his son. If you have a good son you are a very lucky man and certainly have a responsibility to provide for him as much as possible. Even if you didn't have this responsibilitry nor similar ones it would still be unwise to make it easy for unscrupulous theists or anybody else to discredit you when you are in good faith. I would not unnecessarily confront them regarding religion. If I were cornered into it I would (and honestly) say that I thought worship was inconsistent with love. This would put you in the position of defending good in the dialogue. It is inconsistent with love as you might discover from reading in my profile the contientious reasons that I am an Atheist. Please read them and let me know what you think.
It sounds to me like you already have things reconciled. If I can help you in some way I will (although I am not the great expert that you might think) but it seems to me that your head is already very much together.
Theist would say that all of these things are our fault for having sinned. However, if 'god' made all things good and we chose something less, then he must have presented us the alternative. If someone I loved was good I certainly wouldn't tempted him or her to be bad. Therefore, the bottom line is that you are right. It is inconsistent with love.