My former youth pastor told us in our church-based abstinence class (which, incidently, I was kicked out of) that only men had sexual desire, recieved sexual pleasure, were able to separate sex and love, and that when women "acted out sexually", it was either a vain attempt to capture a husband or a response to society (I feel so sorry for his wife!).

How could a person, religious or non-religious, think this shit in the 21st century?! And does religion, especially Judeo-Christianity, truly promote said shit?

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Awesome.
I would be willing to bet he has no idea what that is, where it is, or what to do with it.  I grew up in the bible belt in that type of environment.  My ignorance was profound in this regard until I took it on myself to learn about the details of female anatomy, etc.

I didn't know that masturbation and lesbian sex were vain attempts to capture a husband.

 

It says more about his own prejudices. He doesn't want to believe that women think about such "sinful" things as sex. He's probably even turned on by the idea of his wife being reluctant to have sex with him. Maybe his sex partners were reluctant b/c he's a lousy lay. Or maybe they were more sexually repressed or just better at restraining themselves. Whatever it is, it's really a very sick way to think.

What red state did the "youth pASStor" make this "insightful" statement in? Please tell me he was gay, and can't breed!
Florida

a) Don't feel sorry for his wife. She knew what she was getting when she married him, and probably thinks the same way.

 

b) Masturbation, lesbian sex, one-night stands, prostitutes, porn stars... a tiny sampling of evidence that proves his claim about as wrong as it's possible to be...

Eh, porn stars aren't necessarily having orgasms while they're performing.  Same deal with prostitutes and their work.

I never said they were.

 

Where did I mention anything about orgasms?

 

I'm merely commenting that men are not the only ones who want sex...

 

Although perhaps prostitutes was a bad example. They are there to service men, so... I'll retract that one...

Heh.  That was my point, yes.  They're out there for the money, not because they want the sex.  I'd classify most porn stars in the same category, myself, although I freely admit to not having an insider's perspective of the porn industry.

From what I've read and heard, most porn stars *love* sex. I think there's a misnomer about the porn industry that many don't realize. Outside of certain rather hated exceptions (Girls Gone Wild and the like) the women pretty much control the industry. Most female porn stars choose who they want to work with. Also, the porn industry is now dominated by female directors, label-owners, etc. In fact, I'd say it's fair to say that women control the industry.

 

And I'm not just getting that from documentaries and such. I've met a number of porn stars through a friend who's older brother works the cameras on a lot of shoots in the San Fernando Valley (which is unofficially called "Porn Valley"), and I've been there (San Fernando Valley). I was actually present (behind the cameras) for the shooting of a scene for the recently released XXX Batman parody (the scene was Robin and Batwoman... no, I have not actually seen the whole movie... I'm too big a Batman fan to give my money to such a parody... I just watched that particular scene unfold with my friend). My friend's brother was on the shoot, though not as the main camera-worker on the film (side-note: it is actually not very... erm... exciting to actually watch these kinds of shoots happen... it's rather... um... anticlimactic [pun intended]).

 

What I've seen seems to jive with the accounts I've read and heard. Women seem to run the industry nowadays.

 

I'd also say that in order to be a prostitute, at least in places where it's legal (Nevada, for instance), you'd have to love sex. I can't see someone who absolutely abhors sex doing such a thing no matter how desperate they get. Of course, I'm not talking about sex slavery, which is a whole other discussion entirely...


Hmm, true.  I know that porn and prostitution are completely different animals.  I wasn't thinking of the legal prostitution ... or for that matter even the multiple-thousand a night escorts.  Things are probably a bit different, on that end of the scale.

 

I wouldn't consider porn the same way because ... as you said, they're not really having sex, how most people mean the word.  That's one of the reasons I'm not particularly into pornography.  Most of the stuff I've seen has a slightly (or more than slightly, in many cases) unnatural feel to it, and the soundtracks are mostly ludicrous.

 

I've seen one or two videos that are essentially just someone setting up a camera, and two people having sex on camera.  Those are a lot more interesting, but still not something that I engage in particularly often.

Hmm, true.  I know that porn and prostitution are completely different animals.  I wasn't thinking of the legal prostitution ... or for that matter even the multiple-thousand a night escorts.  Things are probably a bit different, on that end of the scale.

Yeah, street prostitution is a whole different bag. However, again, we have to recognize that, like all things, it's a gray area. I wouldn't be surprised if you came across a street-walker who did enjoy it. Of course, I want to say that most street-walkers don't enjoy it, but I wouldn't know. Legal or not, it's not something I'm interested in (though I do support the legalization of prostitution, I would never be a customer, personally).

I wouldn't consider porn the same way because ... as you said, they're not really having sex, how most people mean the word.  That's one of the reasons I'm not particularly into pornography.  Most of the stuff I've seen has a slightly (or more than slightly, in many cases) unnatural feel to it, and the soundtracks are mostly ludicrous.

That's why I hate it. It's so fake. My favorite thing in the world is... how do I say this while keeping it PG?... the woman's pleasure (okay, so PG-13 :D). And I've been taught how to tell the difference. She's faking it, I'm hating it. That simple. So I generally don't watch porn.

I've seen one or two videos that are essentially just someone setting up a camera, and two people having sex on camera.  Those are a lot more interesting, but still not something that I engage in particularly often.

I have, too. More interesting, because more of a chance that she's enjoying it, but, although I'm 23, there are many ways in which I'm still immature, and everything I haven't experienced. I feel like a voyeur watching that stuff (even if you're supposed to), and that makes me very uncomfortable.

 

Anyways, I think you and I have veered dangerously off-topic... :D

 

Sorry... heh...

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