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Jen E.

any women have fantasies? Please tell me it's not just a "man's pleasure"!

I am a person who has many (recurring and new) very intense sexual fantasies and I always feel so guilty about them. A tape plays in my head over and over again that it's a sin and if something bad happens to me, that means I am being punished.

I have read "My Secret Garden", which brings me back to reality, talking about many kinds of sexual fantasies that *women* have.

And they live "normal" lives, many of them even believe in a God.

I am more in touch now with trauma memories from my earliest childhood existance, where I was severely punished for touching myself or for even feeling some kind of physical pleasure.

"That's not nice, Jencarlene!" (punctuated by hitting) "Shame on you!"

I grew up so scared of my body and sensations.

Scared of being female, too. I remember wanting to be a boy!

Even more scared of people.

So I have these fantasies and feel extreme anxiety afterward.

J.

Views: 27

Replies to This Discussion

Well, I think it helps to have some rather sweet personal affirmation from somone else :) Lets face it, discovery is sooo much more fun with someone else!
true indeed!
I have sexual fantasies--they are a pleasant way to spend some down time. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night hornier than hell from a dream. Strangely, I don't feel guilty for these fantasies despite the fact that I am the queen of guilt when it comes to just about everything else. I have managed to get past some of my issues with guilt, however. It's not easy but you can do it too.
thank you for your latest comments.

J.

Hell yes women have fantasies!  Mine usually involve Henry Rollins for some reason.....

I really enjoyed reading this thread again tonight.

Beat it with logic.

 

I do believe that parenting laced with anti-gender/anti-sex talk IS abuse.

 

I made an atheist abuse group here.

 

ty,

 

J.

My fantasies revolve around becoming a superheroine or having special powers, and romancing guys like Dick Grayson(Robin, Batman's Sidekick for you non-nerds), or working side-by-side with Rorshach from Watchmen or Fanfictiony Scenes that insert myself into Stargate or random movies.....yeah,

Most of mine are things that will never happen, I accept that they will, though. I'm not mourning a lack of superheroes in the world.

Fantasies are healthy, I'm a writer--my stories started with fantasies, specifically fanfiction, but basically fantasies about how I'd like to see things happen.

I guess I'm lucky enough to live in something of my own fantasy world, and isolate myself from what my parents tried to teach--none of the racism or misogyny took.

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