Recovering from Religion

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Recovering from Religion

Unless you were raised by atheist parents, you probably had some recovering to do when you left religion. The purpose of RR is to provide a landing place for people when they jump from religion. With local support groups throughout the US, Canada, UK, and Australia, and real-time resources accessible to everyone, RR is where to turn when faith has lost its luster.

Website: http://www.recoveringfromreligion.org
Location: International
Members: 550
Latest Activity: 9 hours ago

Discussion Forum

In what way are you still recovering from being brought up religious?

Started by Steph S.. Last reply by Richard C Brown 9 hours ago. 57 Replies

I was brought up in a fundamentalist family.Anyone still dealing with any issues from religion?Do you fear the result of coming out Atheist to your family?Any thoughts are welcome.Continue

Catholic Family / Atheist Wedding - HELP

Started by Megan. Last reply by Tom Sarbeck May 31. 4 Replies

Any one else out there still recovering from Catholic guilt??I come from an extremely Catholic family/upbringing. In 6 days I will be the first person in my entire extended family not to marry a Catholic in a Catholic Church.My biggest source of…Continue

Anyone still deal with anything like this?

Started by Starland Victor Seay. Last reply by Matt Skaggs Aug 26, 2013. 27 Replies

One thing I have noticed is a tendency to "doubt" my new path in life. I still want to reach for the Bible sometimes. I still hesitate somewhat when someone mentions Pascal's "Wager"...LOL! Even though I know that science teaches this and that no…Continue

"Thief in the Night"

Started by cbenhamcox. Last reply by Luara Aug 18, 2013. 2 Replies

Last night I was reading Seth Andrew's book, Deconverted, and I almost fell out of my chair when he discussed being forced to watch the end times film from the 1970's call "A Thief in the Night."  He described some of the scenes, and I had a…Continue

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Comment by Mary O'Grady on January 11, 2011 at 4:27pm

I

'd love to take the survey, but my New Year's resolutions include not signing up for things like SurveyMonkey on-line. Is there someplace I can take the survey without opening a new account (and giving up contact info, etc.)?

Thank you!

Comment by Darrel Ray on January 11, 2011 at 1:28pm

Dear RR members:

We are doing a groundbreaking survey on sex and secularism.  We will collect data for a month or so, then shut it down and analyze it.  Depending on what we find, we may publish it in a journal but it will definitely be used in my next book in some capacity.  Here is the link:

http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/PGHSWMW

Take it yourself then let others know about it.

This is a short survey about how your sexuality has developed over time and how it has changed in relation to your lack of belief in a god. The research is being conducted by Dr. Darrel Ray, author of The God Virus and Amanda Brown at the University of Kansas.
This survey is for ATHEISTS, AGNOSTICS, SPIRITUALISTS, HUMANISTS, and SECULARISTS. We need to have people who do not believe in a deity, or organized religion, of any sort.

We hope to get hundreds if not thousands to complete it so we will have a pretty reliable picture of what sexuality looks like in the secular community.  One additional concern is that we really want to encourage women to take the survey.  Men are overwhelmingly represented in the secular community so we want to ensure we get as many women as possible.

Pass this along to any secularists or secular groups you think might be interested.

Thanks for any help,

Darrel

Comment by Richard Goscicki on January 4, 2011 at 7:45pm

Mike, that clears up a lot of my questions.  Thanks. 

I have an old joke I made up:  I can barely take this county, i.e. Florida with all the nudie bars, free speech, multi-millionaires living on the beach in million-dollar condos, and so-called democracy.  I wouldn't last five minutes in a country like Iran. 

My friend, please be smart.  I wish you were here in Florida so we could pass a joint around and discuss this situation.  Future happiness of several people is at state. Above all, you have to realize where you are and don't cause problems you'll only regret.  You're not going to cause any badly-needed social changes. Smile when you have to smile, tough you might be gritting your teeth.

You gotta get out of there, soon as you can.  I don't know how much you love your wife, but it can't be worth living under a repressive, pleasure-negative and religion-intolerant regime.

So, figure out a way to get out and tell your wife "you're either going with me or staying behind. My way or the highway,"as locals here like to say."  "But I'm outta here."

 

I'm in Sarasota, Florida.  I think the government is repressive because I have to wear a seat belt while driving, under threat of a $107 dollar moving-violation ticket.  Also, I have to mow my lawn every three months or so or else get a courtesy note from the Community Assocation.  How much can I take?   

 

So, keep my posted.  Enjoy life.  :-) 

Rich


 

Comment by Mike McDonald on January 4, 2011 at 6:00pm

Yes I am living in Jakarta, Indonesia in a 'Hajji' neighborhood.

Hajji - someone who has been to the Haaj pilgrimage in Saudi Arabia.

So now they are all elevated to most revered among Muslims status! It was a problem when we were first dating because since I'm a westerner I automatically have an inclination towards evil and I come from a place that is 'too free' and  believes in 'free sex'.

I used to get so angry at these absurdities. They actually gave a my then gf a warning of eviction from the neighborhood if i continued to come over after 9 pm! She is in her young thirties and I am in my upper thirties! The reason for this stupidity is that by her and I being together too late, while not being married, will bring bad luck to the neighborhood so in order to avoid the possible danger of a evil infusion the would just kick her out of her home!

 

I wasn't an open atheist until I moved to Indonesia and seen first hand the depths of absurdity into which religion will push people.

Comment by Richard Goscicki on January 4, 2011 at 8:46am

Mike, I've been thinking about your situation and I must admit I'm confounded by it because I don't have enough info. 

 

Are you living in a Muslim community, which would change all possibilities of reform?  Because then, you'd have political and social considerations, as well as familial.  If it's just the latter, you'd have much more opportunity to effectuate change.


I have let her know that when the kids are old enough, when they ask me if I believe in god I will not lie to them for the sake of her belief.

 

This is to be expected of any honest person.  I hope you established this before you got married. 

 

I liked the point about the star stuff.  (You must be a fan, as I, of Carl Sagan.) It's just the heavy elements, the atoms of our body, that were formed on distant stars as a result of nuclear fusion.  Interestingly, every atom of your present body wasn't there ten years ago. 

 

Good luck.  Just try to enjoy life and have as much fun as you can in what sounds like a repressive environment, and don't worry about supernatural horsecrap. 

 

I say horsecrap, because I just learned that Mohammed did have a flying horse named Barack.  I hope the president wasn't named after it. 

 

Comment by Mike McDonald on January 3, 2011 at 8:37am

It is most definitely a sticky wicket. :)

They are young boys so the seeds I plant will hopefully grow some day.

It is very difficult to stand by quietly while my wife and the nanny forcefully indoctrinate the kids by making them repeat the koran practice praying.  My wife can see the irritation in my face, but I smile because I know eventually were going to leave this place and move to a more open society where they will have options and atheism isn't illegal.

I have let her know that when the kids are old enough, when they ask me if I believe in god I will not lie to them for the sake of her belief.

She is not dim and she understands it when I very simplistically mention that we all used to be a star. The start asking lots of questions and my answers are neither complicated nor pro-fantasy so occasionally an argument will arise...

Comment by Richard Goscicki on December 29, 2010 at 11:03am

Wow, Mike, this is a sticky wicket, especially since the children aren't yours biologically.  It must hurt to stand idly by watch them get fed phantasmagorical myths.  Just play devil's advocate
and try to present logical and scientific counterarguments to all the
jinns, houris and flying horses of the Koran. 

I never tried to indoctrinate or proselytize my own son, but rather let him make his own choices. By third grade of Catholic school, he'd had enough. (The Church calls it the Age of Reason.) I
think it was the “Eve was created from Adam's rib” story that
broke the camel's back. Just teach the kids to be critical thinkers
and let the Muslims stew in their own juice.

 

Comment by Mike McDonald on December 27, 2010 at 7:57am
So I am married to a Muslim woman. Not quite as bombastic of a relationship as you might imagine. She is rather open minded as am I. We do what we do and believe how we believe without pushing it on each other. she is very modern, in so far as she doesn't wear traditional Islamic fashion ( jilbab/ hijab).
Yes we have discussions but always stop before they become fiery.
The issue is with our children
They are my step children and I wish to help them recover from religion.
They love astronomy and so I use that sometimes. I mention how we evolved... only in passing. Mostly just to put a seed in their mind. I am hoping that by infusing a little common sense into their otherwise programmed upbringing I can undo some of the religious damage done before it is irreparable.
Comment by Atheist in FundyLand on December 20, 2010 at 12:25pm

Hello Richard,

I escaped from the mental cage many many years ago, but would like to leave FundyLand. Health and monetary issues make that impossible, so I'm learning to cope.

As for sex, I actually wonder if I'm that 1% of people who are actually asexual.

I'm fine for now...just lonely.  My only wish is that I could move out of FundyLand, but it's impossible given my current circumstances.

 

Comment by Richard Goscicki on December 19, 2010 at 9:25am

Fundy, you're just escaped from a mental cage.  You should rejoice like the religious do on Easter Sunday.  Don't be down on yourself.  There are plenty of like-minded liberated people.  Most of us have been through religious training of some sort and survived.

 

Remember sex and bonding is natural to the human species.  Don't lose out on nature's greatest gift to humanity.  Have a positive attitude, be yourself, take care of your health and looks, and as Winston Churchill said, "Never, never, never give up."

 

 

 

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