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Comment by Darrel Ray on February 24, 2011 at 6:11pm

Providence: Your fears and concerns are very common, though I know that is of little solice. I am not sure you ever get over it entirely but it does gradually get better as you get used to it and others recognize that you have taken a different direction.  I lost a number of friends in the process but looking back on it, they were only friends as long as I totally agreed with them. I realized how restricted my relationships with them were when I reflected on it years later.  I missed them for a while, but gradually realized that it was they who chose to leave.  Read The God Virus, it might give you some insight into what is going on both with yourself and with others and make it easier to deal with the transition.  Welcome to the rational world without invisible friends and glad to see you getting great responses from our other members.

Darrel, founder of Recovering from Religion and author of The God Virus.

Comment by Providence on February 24, 2011 at 4:40pm

@Daniel and Linda Thank you so much for your posts! I've really enjoyed watching the videos and i'll be sure to post any gems that I find on here too-in the mean time thethinkingatheist does some great ones which are hilarious too!

I'm still struggling with the feelings associated with breaking from religion, the desire to pray and to belong along with a fear of what my religious friends might think too has been pretty powerful...at least im over the fear of hell at least for now!! :)

In the past my questioning has always made Christians see me as the problematic one and the battle between my intellect and those powerful emotions of fear and the 'religious' feeling have made me want to leave religion, feel guilty and so try EXTRA hard to stay with it! (a ridiculous cycle!) At the minute I am gradually 'coming out' to some of my friends- largely because i will feel dishonest if i dont, I do not feel that lying to them and telling them that i attend mass will achieve anything!) One 'friend' in particular has been trying to convert me back 'youll be back in the church in a couple of weeks!', 'just have faith', 'your heading into darkness which will end in eternal darkness' etc etc I was SOOO insulted! aaaah!! I mean, I am terribly sorry that I have started to think for myself!!!! Grrr....

anyway, my apologies folks...rant over!!! :)

Comment by Richard Goscicki on February 24, 2011 at 3:55pm

Providence, about the heaven/hell belief, the best way to fight it (for me) is to realize that it makes no sense. None of the ancient religions had any concept of an eternal hell. It took the Catholics to come up with it as a marketing ploy after Emperor Constantine imposed Christianity on western civilization.

 

Let's think about it a few minutes. Would a god who is supposed to be All-Good and All-Knowing purposely create an individual knowing that his creation would wind up in perpetual torment? As Marcus Aurelius says in Meditations, such a god wouldn't be worthy of our respect.

 

To make matters worse, this All-Loving god would condemn us to the eternal fire just for NOT believing that he exists based on the flimsiest evidence and the word of some priests.

 

It doesn't make sense that a god would punish us so severely for refusing to abandon reason. 

Comment by Linda on February 23, 2011 at 2:24pm

Maybe this video can help too (even though it's funny - it's so true)!~ lol

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DvRPbsXBVBo

Comment by Daniel on February 23, 2011 at 12:28pm

Here are a couple of videos that can help...

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XaL7CkQaQpU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wbrQI0r1B7w

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MlnnWbkMlbg

 

As for guilt; if you were raised religious and became devout, it is hard to completely remove it from your mind, if not impossible. You will still occasionally find remnants; things that affect how you think, how you act. I still find that I'm susceptible to stress, and emotional apologetic arguments. I prayed about a month ago when I was going through some intense family issues, I felt myself wanting to believe in a God, and I found myself thoroughly enjoying and being moved by an episode of "Touched by an Angel". Of course, these things did not worry me. I was strongly aware of how these things were illogical; it was only affecting my emotions, not my actions. I was still living the same way, still treating others the same way. These people didn't have power over me.

 

To borrow Darrel's analogy, you've been infected with the God virus. You've had the disease; but now you're cured. You have a powerful resistance now to the most prevalent disease in the world. Because of our rational thought, we're resistant to fearing ghosts, curses and demons. We don't waste time with pointless, boring rituals. We don't fear trying on ideas. We don't spend money on homeopathy, magical or pseudoscientific jewelery or clothing. We don't base relationships our decisions on the arbitrary position of stars at the time of our birth-such is the way of the skeptic. The fact that you are rational puts you at a massive advantage to the rest of the world. Of course, it still sounds like you're new at it, and more susceptible. You'll be more sensitive to pleasant sounding claims, and things you were raised to admire and trust. Be aware, be skeptical, and get help when you're not sure; there's an army of benevolent, rational people online, who will help you when you're struggling when a theist argument. Google is a powerful ally in your fight for lifelong freedom. If you're struggling with a particular issue, I can usually reference a video or two.

 

One site which helped me think more critically about things was skepdic.com

 

Most of the material on there isn't religion related, but its all about the thought process, and believe what the evidence shows rather than what you want to.

 

god be less=)

 

 

 

 

Comment by Providence on February 23, 2011 at 11:46am

Im glad to have stumbled on to this group, I am a recovering Catholic who has just recently made the jump in to Atheism...scary but AWESOME!!! THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER DONE!!!

one problem..fear of hell/guilt..does anyone know how to get rid of it? :)

Comment by Rachel on February 12, 2011 at 9:02am

I am glad to have found this group. I am recovering from Mennonite indoctrination. My story is on the nexus home page so I will not reintroduce myself but I just wanted to say hi and I am glad to find you all!

Comment by L.Hunter on February 10, 2011 at 9:47am

Some interesting reads....

This is your brain...this is your brain on god

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=110997741

 

Scientology

http://www.npr.org/2011/02/08/133561256/the-church-of-scientology-f...

Comment by Austin Meek on January 29, 2011 at 1:48am

I just got finished reading The God Virus.  I now have a much better understanding of why otherwise rational people would believe the most outlandish of things and continue to follow people that have done horrible things and committed heinus attrocities.  Great job!!!

 

P.S.  I've completed the Sex and Secularism survey.  Keep up the good work!

 

 

Comment by Darrel Ray on January 24, 2011 at 10:43am

6,112 people have started the Sex and Secularism survey and 4,103 have completed it for a 67.1% completion rate. That is fantastic! The survey will close on Jan. 30.  If you have not completed it, please do. We are especially interested in hearing from women, LGBT people, and those who have been secular all their life. Please let all you secular friends know about the survey.Survey

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