8-9 months ago, I had a fear that I was going to be punished due to all the questions I had about biblical contradictions. it took some time but I am better now. I am VERY confident that Non theism is the right choice. I actually think clearly now.
I had a fear that I was going to hell because I had committed the unforgivable sin mentioned in Mathew 12. Then I had a fear after that that Jesus was returning because the pastor preached mathew 24 and Revalations. Guaranteed tickest to hell and guaranteed hell on earth aren't a fun concoction.
Im pretty sure the unpardonable sin was blaspheming the holy ghost. This is where that whole blasphemy challenge comes from. Don't really matter since non of it is real. We might as well blaspheme the Lochness Monster or Voltron.
Mat 12.31 talks about how all sin will be forgiven, except the sin or blasphemy against the holy spirit. So most theologians believe that to talk against or attribute god's handi-work to Satan counts as blasphemy. But then there are some who think this sin is something else. If one commits this they will never be forgiven and are doomed to hell.
But like we already said...makes no difference since its all as real as the smurfs and Pokemon.
Just one more thing that god screwed up on. The one sin that he doesn't forgive and there's confusion about what it actually means. Sad. You know what's more sad. The fact that I fell for it for five years. Every day thinking that I had commited that sin without actually knowing what that sin was. I never bothered to even look up the word blaspheme because I was to scared. So I didn't know what it meant. All that stress for nothing.
It takes time for our indoctrination to fade. After five yrs I still wake up in the middle of the night and wonder "what if hell is real?" Then reason sets in and I confidently go back to sleep. The last 'hurdle' for me to get over was Jesus. I asked myself "why would somebody die like that if they weren't what they said they were?" Then after more research I found out what most of us have...that he is a myth and legend. But I understand the fear of mentally asking these questions. It's painful and dreadful. I had many sleepless nights and restless days challenging the question of god's existence and punishments.
We are not alone in our fears, concerns or moments. We will get through them.
Sessions like this will help us to get over the fear of hell and enjoy the here and now. To be robbed of precious life and energy behind BS is unforgivable. But if we don't move on we will never enjoy this life to its fullest. We can do it!!!!