How does one build community? It seems to me the very first thing needed is to have self-respect. By using one's mind, heart and stomach to help inform one during a conflict, the likelihood of a better solution will be found.
2. One needs to be able and willing to work for a principle upon which he/she stands, not by using bombs or bullets, or billy clubs, but by clearly identifying a problem, imagining a preferred future, working with other who agree and persuasion with those who disagree.
3. This process includes speaking your truth and listening actively to others' truths, identifying the things upon which one agrees and working on the disputed areas by negotiation and compromise.
4. Build from where one is, winning some disputes, losing some, and constantly working toward a goal that will empower all people to flourish.
5. As all contribute to the process, finding better ways of living together as a community requires recognizing a far larger picture, a vision of building a flourishing life for all.
But there are steps before that. First people must be slowed down a bit, by a greeting, a mini garden, a travelling book or whatever, so they stop looking at just their own interests and realize that they've got neighbours... and many people in apartment blocks want nothing to do with other people. A few times a year there's community cleaning and a bbq after that - the community builders are all there, and who knows who else?
You are quite right! I like the way you phrased it ... slowing down a bit ... and ways to do that. Good advice.