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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 837
Latest Activity: 1 hour ago

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

what boobs are good for

Started by dr kellie. Last reply by Bertold Brautigan 19 hours ago. 77 Replies

I discovered a brilliant new way to avoid  having xians ring my doorbell in attempt to share the good news with me.  Just now, I was in my kitchen, washing dishes and finding something to eat, when I looked out the large window above my sink.  Two…Continue

Surreal, I haz it

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Aug 6. 76 Replies

Surreal, not just found in art.Continue

Tags: surreal

Eat vegetables, Be happy

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Plinius Aug 1. 9 Replies

An association between the amount of fruit and vegetables people ate and their happiness? Yes indeed. People who ate 7 portions of fruits and/or vegetables a day were the happiest.…Continue

Tags: vegetables, fruit, diet, happiness

Optical Illusions

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Idaho Spud Jul 30. 59 Replies

This one seems a bit creepy, like the middle one shouldn't be able to change rotation like that. from Cheezburger.comContinue

Forest Fire

Started by Patricia. Last reply by Patricia Jul 21. 14 Replies

Continue

Comment Wall

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Comment by Joan Denoo on June 21, 2014 at 11:44am

Chris, these complexities hurt at such a deep level. Neglect or overprotection by a parent creates scar tissue that lasts a lifetime. Your care and concern and respect for your husband is well placed and you share his burden with good sense. Yes, the questions touch into a deep place and your answer is not long. It appears you read the situation well and make a difference in your husband's life.

Growing up in a mentally healthy environment can be a rare thing, and replacing the dysfunction with well thought out remedies and caring action helps to bring about a better future.

Thank you for your honesty, and for your great heart. We all benefit by having people around us such as yourself. Know that you are not alone, and that we support you in any way we can.

OK! Now on to the tasks at hand.

 

Comment by Plinius on June 21, 2014 at 11:10am

Deep question, Joan! My husband is the elder brother, and like the eldest, he feels responsible. Mother-in-law loved children but couldn't handle them at all: she neglected the first one, overprotected the second one (the Asperger), and lost the third one when he went to play on the railroad tracks with friends - 4 years old. I think the family survived rather than lived after that.    I have a deep respect for my husband that he never abandoned his family even when they hurt him, and I encouraged him to grow and get strong and confident. I fully understand that he saw no other possibility to handle the family situation. The last one of his family is b-i-l, and it's impossible to change that one.

A deep question, and perhaps a longer answer than you wanted.

Comment by Joan Denoo on June 21, 2014 at 10:36am

How does your husband handle the disrespect from his brother? Ouch! that must hurt! Is your husband younger than his brother and was he disrespected as they grew into adulthood?

Comment by Plinius on June 21, 2014 at 10:29am

Yes - you can choose your partner and the in-laws are extra. B-i-l can't help that he doesn't understand love, empathy, sympathy and respect, but I keep wondering why he always watches old sentimental children's series...

Comment by Joan Denoo on June 21, 2014 at 10:02am

Is b-i-l your husband's brother? 

Comment by booklover on June 21, 2014 at 7:50am

Comment by booklover on June 21, 2014 at 7:49am

Carl, those are funny! :)

Comment by booklover on June 21, 2014 at 7:49am

I'm glad you're going to put limits on your contact with your b-i-l soon Chris.  You and your husband don't deserve that kind of treatment.  You've done so much for him!

Comment by Plinius on June 21, 2014 at 2:12am

Oh, then my husband would struggle on on his own. I see what it does to us, to be treated without respect or sympathy, like a thing without feeling. We get orders from the patient, but never thanks. I've known b-i-l for 37 years now; if we don't see him very often all goes well, but all that changed when he got that accident. We just have to work on for two months longer and then I'm going to ration the contact again. You can say that b-i-l is a patient, and that is true, but there's a limit to what I can handle.

Comment by Joan Denoo on June 21, 2014 at 1:30am

Plinius, I hear you! What is the worst that would happen if you just closed the door on this chapter of your life?

 

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