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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 849
Latest Activity: 4 hours ago

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

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Discussion Forum

Surreal, I haz it

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner 23 hours ago. 79 Replies

Surreal, not just found in art.Continue

Tags: surreal

Secular and Reclaimed Winter Holiday Songs

Started by Grinning Cat. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner yesterday. 37 Replies

This is an appropriate day of the year for this subject...What are some of your favorite winter holiday songs?It would be especially good to share powerful new secular lyrics to tunes that have become associated with Christmas.…Continue

Tags: singing, lyrics, reclaimed, reclaiming, HumanLight

Aljam

Started by Randall Smith. Last reply by Joan Denoo yesterday. 3 Replies

I'm not a news hound by any stretch, but I do like to stay informed about what's going on in the world. (I despise "local" news with all the reports of murders, robberies, fires, etc.)The national "evening" news shows really irritate me. I hate…Continue

Seth Andrews - The Copycats: How Christianity Steals The Best Ideas

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Loren Miller on Friday. 5 Replies

Many of us have observed or learned how christianity shamelessly borrows from other sources to bolster its position and show off its supposed wonderfulness.  Well, Seth Andrews of The Thinking Atheist podcast has compiled some of the more modern-day…Continue

Tags: steal, borrow, copycat, The Thinking Atheist, Seth Andrews

Attacks in Canada Oct. 22nd/14

Started by Patricia. Last reply by The Flying Atheist on Thursday. 4 Replies

This was devastating for us........…Continue

Granddaughters

Started by Donald R Barbera. Last reply by Donald R Barbera Nov 15. 6 Replies

I've got three grandsons and I love them to death, but my youngest son and his wife had a baby girl in January and I haven't  right since. Granddaughter has me wrapped up like my grandsons never did. What is it about granddaughters? Her name is…Continue

Tags: grand-parent, girls, little, granddaughters

Comment Wall

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Comment by booklover on April 28, 2013 at 8:20am

Thanks Steph, and Ian.

Lillie, thanks for your response, and yes, the more I read and discuss on AN, the more I can't take listening to religious crap!  I have become much more militant about it, and, as a result, have lost more "real life" friends.  I agree with Steph about better to have no friends than the wrong ones.  Luckily I do have an Athiest friend, and one I guess I would call Agnostic.  I can say what I want in front of her with no offense taken, and she agrees with what I say.  Her son, who is an Atheist, is my sons best friend.  I am tired of "breaking-up" with people, so I am going to do this slowly and gently.

Comment by Ian Mason on April 28, 2013 at 12:59am

Melinda, you've had all the good advice there is so I won't add more.

"Why do you care?" YES, that gets up my nose too. I care because that religious stuff is DANGEROUS. As soon as anyone believes that the "Truth", perfect and unquestionable, is out there the seed is sown for fanaticism. On top of that, believers expect respect for just being believers and religion is held to be above criticism. How often have we said that certain behaviour is unacceptable and been rebuffed with "but it's their religion"? Dennet's book "Breaking the Spell" goes into this in detail and if anyone hasn't read it, I can recommend doing so.

Comment by Lillie on April 28, 2013 at 12:07am

Melinda, I had the same thing happen with a friend who was becoming very pushy and dictatorial.  I began having other plans whenever she called.  Eventually she stopped calling.  You could tell your friend that alcohol no longer agrees with you and you would just rather not be around it.  Or more to the point you could tell her that it is becoming more difficult to discuss religion as you have moved so far from these discussions.  At any rate, I know you will be able to deal with this as you are becoming more confident in the direction your life is taking.  I like to think that A/N is playing a part in this.  Good luck.

Comment by Joan Denoo on April 27, 2013 at 10:56pm

Comment by Joan Denoo on April 27, 2013 at 10:23pm

sk8eycat, you write, "I am so passionate about keeping religion out of politics" reveals that you have understanding about the long range consequences of mixing the two. 

Remember the physician, Dr. Ignaz Philipp Semmelweis, who realized doctors were infecting their patients with some unseen infections and tried to convince them to wash their hands between touching those who are sick. His colleagues laughed at him and called him insane. The poor man was committed to an asylum, where he died at age 47 after being beaten by the guards, only 14 days after he was committed.

Or remember the geologist, J Harlen Bretz, who published research papers in 1923 theorizing water caused the landforms in eastern and southern Washington state, even though there was no evidence of water that could have done it. Other geologists laughed at him and dismissed him. A man by the name of Joseph T. Pardee knew where the water came from. It wasn't until mid-1950s Bretz’s interpretations could no longer be ignored, and the geology society accepted his theory.

We are, today, at the place where people do not recognize the risk of mixing church and state. Either they don't remember history, or they believe some superpower will come to our rescue, or their economic futures are tied to the value of using religion to control the public. 

Observe the evidence; it is clear what side of the fence you are on and even if you stand alone, you are correct. 

Comment by Steph S. on April 27, 2013 at 10:07pm

I would rather have no friends than the wrong type of friends.

Comment by Steph S. on April 27, 2013 at 10:07pm

Actually Ruth you have it right. I would advise Melinda the same way, and like you I don't have any real life friends- just friends here on the site. Just the online type friend.

Comment by Steph S. on April 27, 2013 at 10:05pm

Yes, sk8eycat I have encountered apathy toward religion in politics and daily life. Usually I hear; "Why can't you just leave people alone?"

Comment by sk8eycat on April 27, 2013 at 9:25pm

I've been working on my little Pet Press job, witha grumpy computer...aaarrgh!...so I haven't been keeping up with the discussions in here...except for a little bit.

I have a question: One of my best friends is tending toward atheism, but she just doesn't understand why I am so passionate about keeping religion out of politics.  Her attitude toward religion could be described as indifference, while mine is more like disgust.  Has anybody else encountered this attitude of "Why do you care? Why don't you just ignore it?"

I have said that I love my country, and am appalled at all the "god blessing" that comes out of the mouths of people who are supposed to represent me.  I'm also frightend by the dominionists; they have come very close to taking over (with a faith-based office in the White House, for one thing) a few times, and if we don't wake up and do something about them ....well...

The only encouraging news is the growing numbers of "nones" in the last 15 years or so. But I just don't understand indifference.

Anybody got any comments?

Comment by booklover on April 27, 2013 at 8:49pm

Thanks for the advice Ruth!  I feel like you do about the flesh and blood friends.  I like you guys on here much better!  I do have a couple of Atheist and Agnostic friends that I do have coffee with occasionally.  I also have my Mom, and we literally agree on EVERYTHING.  She is 70, and I hope she lives 30 more years!!!!  With health problems, and getting older (ME), I just don't have the time or energy or drive to deal with making plans with friends, especially when I no longer have things in common with them!  The one militantly Atheist friend I have is also extremely left-wing liberal, as am I, so we can freely discuss anything without hesitation.  I do enjoy visiting each other maybe every other week, during the afternoon, for about 2 hours!  That's been our way for a few years, and so I do get out a little socially.  There is another lady we invite who is maybe not quite as "radical" as we are, but it's comfortable with her there too. :)

 

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