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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 852
Latest Activity: yesterday

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

Betty Explains Religious Freedom (Betty Bowers)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Randall Smith yesterday. 9 Replies

Well, considering all the RFRA bills popping up all over the United States, plus all the fun and games ISIS is bringing to the good folks in Syria and Iraq, Betty Bowers, the epitome of well-dressed christianity, has decided to clarify the true…Continue

Tags: persecution, ISIS, Religious Freedom, America's Best Christian, Betty Bowers

Surreal, I haz it

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner May 6. 82 Replies

Surreal, not just found in art.Continue

Tags: surreal

Let's not define ourselves or others by our worst behaviors

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Dominique Lutz Apr 16. 6 Replies

My take on the recent melt down at Hang With Friends, of which I missed part, is that some of us were tripped up by a habit of thought. It's something we learn growing up, and use without realizing how much pain it can generate -  failing to…Continue

Tags: dispute at Hang With Friends

The FLDS Cult Is Unraveling

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Idaho Spud Mar 29. 3 Replies

The FLDS Cult Is Unraveling"the internet is a lifeline for people trapped in the most restrictive and stifling forms of…Continue

Tags: Warren Jeff, internet, FLDS

Ode to Yahweh (Non Stamp Collector & 43alley)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Joan Denoo Mar 24. 1 Reply

Ages ago (five or six years, I guess it is) when I first started recognizing my own atheism, one of the first atheist YouTubers I ran onto was Non Stamp Collector.  His handiwork wasn't up to Disney's standards, nor even Hanna-Barbera, but his wit…Continue

Tags: Yahweh, YouTube, 43alley, Non Stamp Collector

Oregon Field Guide - Lamprey Decline

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Mar 15. 3 Replies

Oregon Field Guide - Lamprey Decline"Populations of Eel-like lamprey have suddenly plummeted since the year 2000 in the Columbia Basin, surprising…Continue

Comment Wall

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You need to be a member of Hang With Friends to add comments!

Comment by sk8eycat on June 9, 2013 at 3:29am

Another "Moon River." One of the very first jokes I was sent in 2001 when I first went online.

Comment by sk8eycat on June 9, 2013 at 3:24am

Moon River....?

Comment by sk8eycat on June 9, 2013 at 3:09am

I don't know much about my mother's ancestors, but I do know that some of Dad's ancestors were younger sons who would not inherit, so they took a chance on the colonies.  One went  south, and the other stayed in New England (Dad was descended from the New Englander).  The Southerner was the ancestor of a Confederate general...when I was touring with Holiday, I kept running into my last name all over the place.

Some of Mother's ancestors stood on the shore of their native land, watching the Europeans sailing in...with their technology, weapons, and diseases...saying "There goes the neighborhood."

Or something like that.

*******************************

The good news is that polls show that the percentage of adult non-believers in the USA is rising rapidly, especially ammong college students. 30% - plus, now.  There is hope.

 

Comment by Plinius on June 9, 2013 at 1:44am

Once I began to piece this kind of information together, I knew that violence, oppression, domination were a very clear and a real part of my cultural heritage. I wondered if I could break the cycles of violence in my descendants. 

That is a very big thing - to try and break the cycles of violence in your descendants - but also a very brave choice. I think you'll never know if you succeeded. But you've got wonderful children!

How are you feeling today?

Comment by Joan Denoo on June 9, 2013 at 1:29am

Chris, maybe we could have a group Moon at NSA.

Comment by Joan Denoo on June 9, 2013 at 1:28am

Chris, my ancestors left Plymouth, England because they were being persecuted by the Church of England (or some religious body)  for Leiden, Holland, and found it too liberal for their tastes. My ancestor purchased passage for herself and 10 year old son by agreeing to go to the Plymouth colon to be "breed stock." She fulfilled her agreement, had a daughter in Plymouth, and I am descended from her. 

I wonder what options were open for her in 1632? Not much! Later generations were in Salem, Mass. and were accusers of witches. When I started my quest, I hoped to fine some family traditions with which I could feel a pride. Alas, my ancestors, in addition to accusing children and adults of being witches, also participated in cutting off noses of Quakers who refused to submit to their rule.

Once I began to piece this kind of information together, I knew that violence, oppression, domination were a very clear and a real part of my cultural heritage. I wondered if I could break the cycles of violence in my descendants. 

And yes, they did breed like vermin. 

Comment by Plinius on June 9, 2013 at 12:50am

 that the U.S. is the most religious nation on earth!!! 

We waved good-bye to a lot of them; Pilgrim Fathers, Mennonites, Hernhutters, and so on, but there are Always enough left - they multiply like pests. And that makes me think what effect they have on natural selection....  

Comment by sk8eycat on June 9, 2013 at 12:02am

Joan, I love that sly NSA graphic, even though the situation itself scares the *bleep!* outta me.  I have nothing to hide, but I remember how the KGB used to operate, and one of my usual sarcastic remarks could be misunderstood if overheard...and taken seriously...and I'm too old to put up with their brand of interror-gation.

***************

I also can relate to your post about "people-pleasing."  We talked about that a lot when I was going to 12-step meetings for Adult Children of Alcoholics (ACA).  It's a behavioral symptom of some sort of childhood dysfunctional family stuff.

In my own case, I was never physically or emotionally abused, but I believed that if I could just do the right thing, like get better grades in school, my dad would stop drinking.  He was a "quiet" alcoholic...no yelling, or physical tantrums, but he just wasn't "there."  He did finally dry out when I was 20, and I went to work for him...learning bookkeeping...for 7 years.  Till he fell off the wagon, and I ran away again.  (Re-joined Holiday.)

When I was older I found myself dating guys who drank too much, and I finally realized that I was looking for someone like my father.

Then there were a few who tried to control me...my beliefs and taste in entertainment.

I ran like hell from all of them.  I didn't know why at the time, but I guess it was just self-preservation.  I couldn't imagine myself spending my life with any of them (and having their children. Gack!).

D'ruther have a non-physical relationship with a gay man...or men, except I'm a lousy roommate.  The only reason my sister and I are able to live together is that we leave each other alone.

Anyway, I didn't understand why I did what I did till I started talking to other people who'd been through the same sort of things.  ACA really did help for a couple of years, till I got tired of all the "god talk."  and fore, it wasn't like AA where you have to keep going to meetings for the rest of your life.  I just needed to step back and take a good look at myself, and figure out why I kept putting myself in people-pleasing "doormat" situations. And stop it.

I wan't pleasing anybody, anyway.  Especially not myself.

Comment by Ruth Anthony-Gardner on June 8, 2013 at 11:33pm

ROFL, too right, Joan, "the only part of government that listens."

It was inevitable that government would spy on all of us, with today's connectivity. My solution is that the more power an individual has the more his or her life should be an open book. It should go both ways. It's the imbalance of information power that disturbs me, not the spying per se. If corporate honchos and politicians had absolutely no privacy they couldn't abuse this power.

Comment by Joseph Corder on June 8, 2013 at 7:40pm

sk8eycat, Oh yes, great speech!  Very humble!  I loved the parts about adding the inconsistencies up and coming to the conclusion that it's B.S.  I can relate!  I was raised as a Methodist( the very liberal style), but my parents weren't that religious.  My parents never held us back from learning and NEVER bitched about our choices pertaining to religion!  My biggest mistake is believing that people didn't take this shit seriously!  One of my worst days of my life was when I found out that the U.S. is the most religious nation on earth!!!  Fu**in sad!!!

 

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