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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 852
Latest Activity: 10 hours ago

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

Surreal, I haz it

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Joan Denoo Apr 21. 81 Replies

Surreal, not just found in art.Continue

Tags: surreal

Let's not define ourselves or others by our worst behaviors

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Dominique Lutz Apr 16. 6 Replies

My take on the recent melt down at Hang With Friends, of which I missed part, is that some of us were tripped up by a habit of thought. It's something we learn growing up, and use without realizing how much pain it can generate -  failing to…Continue

Tags: dispute at Hang With Friends

The FLDS Cult Is Unraveling

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Idaho Spud Mar 29. 3 Replies

The FLDS Cult Is Unraveling"the internet is a lifeline for people trapped in the most restrictive and stifling forms of…Continue

Tags: Warren Jeff, internet, FLDS

Ode to Yahweh (Non Stamp Collector & 43alley)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Joan Denoo Mar 24. 1 Reply

Ages ago (five or six years, I guess it is) when I first started recognizing my own atheism, one of the first atheist YouTubers I ran onto was Non Stamp Collector.  His handiwork wasn't up to Disney's standards, nor even Hanna-Barbera, but his wit…Continue

Tags: Yahweh, YouTube, 43alley, Non Stamp Collector

Oregon Field Guide - Lamprey Decline

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Mar 15. 3 Replies

Oregon Field Guide - Lamprey Decline"Populations of Eel-like lamprey have suddenly plummeted since the year 2000 in the Columbia Basin, surprising…Continue

Richard Dawkins, Growing Up in the Universe

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Joan Denoo Mar 14. 2 Replies

Here is an oldie, the young Richard Dawkins teaching kids about the universe. I especially like the one demonstrating how the eye evolved. This should answer those who believe it was impossible to evolve an eye. Continue

Tags: universe, teaching, Dawkins, Richard

Comment Wall

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Comment by Joan Denoo on July 21, 2013 at 1:23pm
Ruth, very good point, "I don’t think fear of rejection keeps people in long term relationships."

My fear when leaving religion behind was that I would not have as good a support system. I didn't think in terms of having a healthier one. After leaving, finding friends to share my thoughts developed, slowly at first, and when all is said and done, I am far healthier with healthy friends and family.

My fear when leaving my marriage was that I would be alone, unable to cope with three small children, and I would never travel again. All those faux-fears never materialized. I have never been as lonely as when I was married; my children began to thrive without the brutal hand of ebedience training; and I was able to do research in 32 nations after my divorce.

By facing my fears, thinking for myself, paying attention to outcomes, I was able to not only survive but thrive.

Thanks for the opportunity to rethink my previous comment.
Comment by The Flying Atheist on July 21, 2013 at 12:49pm

I'm am quite aware of the many sacrifices that were made by civilians during the period of WWII.  Government enforced rationing of meat, gas, rubber (auto tires), sugar, butter, coffee, metal, etc, etc.  The long list goes on and on.  I often times wonder if our society today could even begin to accept such inconveniences without total anarchy breaking out.  The modern, western-style of over-consumption has not only become our normal standard of living but also an expected human right, any negative consequences be damned.  

Since the time of WWII we have participated in several more wars but we have not rationed since the 1940's.  We had long lines for gasoline for a short period in the 1970's, but alas, that was only temporary.  Once the oil was flowing again, our over-consumption kicked right back in.  I'm deeply troubled by this behavior and I'm at a loss for a solution.  As I stated above, I honestly don't think our selfish society today would allow government enforced cutbacks on our consumption without all Hell breaking loose.  And it doesn't help that many people don't even wish to do so voluntarily.  We're in a very sad state. 

Comment by Ruth Anthony-Gardner on July 21, 2013 at 12:47pm

Yes, welcome indeed, John Kennedy Opiyo.


Randall, I bristle too when an otherwise resonant passage suddenly slips in theism. My tolerance for theism is very very low. I even react negatively when I see atheists here wasting otherwise productive minds discussing nuances of theistic doctrine.


Yes, Joan, a wider, longer perception of events is what I need, along with enjoyment of fluttering fledglings on shrubs. I appreciate Albert Ellis, but I don’t think fear of rejection keeps people in long term relationships. We have an instinctive need for other people.


Ian, I enjoy neon lights, and find it easy to ignore the commercial messages for the color and luminosity.

Comment by Ian Mason on July 21, 2013 at 11:48am

Welcome, John Kennedy Opiyo. Enjoy yourself here and be sure that you have the support of good, kind people.

Felaine, loosing a pet is hard. Feel free to vent, We understand and feel with you.

Joan, I wouldn't want to be without the benefits of modern society but we really do need to learn responsibility. Life wouldn't be so hard without, for example, huge neon advertising signs. I reflect sometimes on the root of the word "luxury", from the Greek "lux" meaning light. There were times when light was a luxury for 90% of people. Shouldn't go back to those times but a little moderation would benefit here in the over-consuming West. We could learn to appreciate the darkness/night but of course without "god" coming into it.

Comment by Joan Denoo on July 21, 2013 at 11:31am
Randall, The night sky, diversity of flora, fauna, and elements, opportunity, and possibilities all reside in the perception of the individual and require no god to make them magnificent and preferable. To refer to nature and god in the same paragraph reveals more about the writer than about the nature of these things. Personally, I think referring to god creates a dumbing down of society. Ya, I am pissed when I read such drivel as well.
Comment by Loren Miller on July 21, 2013 at 9:03am

You're not the only one to be pissed off by Bogard's presumption, Randall.  May I heartily recommend you write NatGeo and register a bit of indignation with them?  Somehow, people need to understand that awe and wonder need not be coupled to some imagined super-being, that the beauty of this reality stands amazingly well all on its own.

Comment by Joan Denoo on July 21, 2013 at 8:16am
6:00 AM, 58 degrees F, and I am headed to the garden until the heat drives me in for the day. Mosquitoes keep me inside in the late afternoon, so I have 5-6 hours of wallowing in the pure pleasure of plants, birds, squirrels, and a new visitor, a Siamese cat intent on catching birds. I hope my fences around the feeding stations protect my little friends. The fledglings sit on wires or shrubs, fluttering their wings, mouth wide open waiting for their parents to provide food. Bird-parents are not yet at the time when they fly away in the presence of a fluttering offspring.
Ruth, what a nice comment to read, your appreciation for balance. It seems I have a wider, longer perception of events and that moderates the present messes we experience. I believe most problems, conflicts, and chaos are opportunities for solutions and my job is to find ways to make life better.

"People could rationally decide that prolonged relationships take up too much time and effort and that they'd much rather do other kinds of things. But most people are afraid of rejection."
~ Albert Ellis
Comment by Randall Smith on July 21, 2013 at 7:46am

Is there no escape? From Bright Nights, Big Problems, a National Geographic article by Paul Bogard, he writes, "Most of us have lost this opportunity to be awed at the sight (night sky), to feel similarly inspired to create, to change our lives, to gain a greater understanding of our God."  I don't know about you, but I bristle when I read that. Perhaps he meant nothing by saying "our God". Still, was it necessary?

Comment by Ruth Anthony-Gardner on July 21, 2013 at 12:10am

Thanks for the upbeat note, Joan. I agree. Chaos can generate the energy to make necessary changes. I do have a vision for humanity surviving in a more mature form. Sometimes my mood is dark and I post that way. I appreciate your balance. What would we do without you! What would I do without you!

Sorry about Hairy Jerry, sk8eycat. We’re with you, whatever course you take. If he were my cat I would have him put down humanely. It's very fast and virtually painless (just the needle). I waited until my first cat was having convusions for a couple of days, though we knew she was deathly ill. Later I felt guilty for making her suffer so long. Cancer is painful, and we don't realize their pain because they  instinctively conceal it. Frankly, when I saw Mushroom's pupils overdilate a second after the morphine injection, I thought that might be a nice way for me to die were I terminally ill. I tear up thinking about the event, but it felt right. It's better than a pet hiding, as they do when in severe pain at the end, and dying slowly, all alone, afraid and in pain. Ach. There I go again with an excursion into the bad parts of life. I hope you don't all think me bipolar or something.

Thanks for the hilarious annoyed cat picture, booklover.

Your funny meme is also a hoot, Flying Atheist.

I have to mellow out.

Comment by The Flying Atheist on July 20, 2013 at 3:18pm

 

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