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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 833
Latest Activity: 1 hour ago

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

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Discussion Forum

Optical Illusions

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Idaho Spud 6 hours ago. 59 Replies

This one seems a bit creepy, like the middle one shouldn't be able to change rotation like that. from Cheezburger.comContinue

Forest Fire

Started by Patricia. Last reply by Patricia Jul 21. 14 Replies

Continue

change.org

Started by Patricia. Last reply by The Flying Atheist Jul 16. 6 Replies

There's a new petition taking off on Change.org, and we think you might be…Continue

Saving Number 90 - From Seth Andrews (The Thinking Atheist)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Joan Denoo Jul 1. 9 Replies

Seth says himself that the following is a departure from the usual fare his YouTube channel features.  Personally, I think it's a positive and constructive move, because it demonstrates that no, we are NOT just about atheism.  We're also very much…Continue

Tags: abuse, animal, puppy mills, Henry, The Thinking Atheist

Human Rights for Atheists, Agnostics and Secularists

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Loren Miller Jun 27. 11 Replies

I just ran onto this YouTube video, promoting a change.org petition aimed at amending the United Nations charter supporting the abolition of all anti-blasphemy laws. The petition referenced by the video is…Continue

Tags: petition, anti-blasphemy laws, UN, United Nations

Comment Wall

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Comment by Joan Denoo on June 9, 2013 at 1:29am

Chris, maybe we could have a group Moon at NSA.

Comment by Joan Denoo on June 9, 2013 at 1:28am

Chris, my ancestors left Plymouth, England because they were being persecuted by the Church of England (or some religious body)  for Leiden, Holland, and found it too liberal for their tastes. My ancestor purchased passage for herself and 10 year old son by agreeing to go to the Plymouth colon to be "breed stock." She fulfilled her agreement, had a daughter in Plymouth, and I am descended from her. 

I wonder what options were open for her in 1632? Not much! Later generations were in Salem, Mass. and were accusers of witches. When I started my quest, I hoped to fine some family traditions with which I could feel a pride. Alas, my ancestors, in addition to accusing children and adults of being witches, also participated in cutting off noses of Quakers who refused to submit to their rule.

Once I began to piece this kind of information together, I knew that violence, oppression, domination were a very clear and a real part of my cultural heritage. I wondered if I could break the cycles of violence in my descendants. 

And yes, they did breed like vermin. 

Comment by Plinius on June 9, 2013 at 12:50am

 that the U.S. is the most religious nation on earth!!! 

We waved good-bye to a lot of them; Pilgrim Fathers, Mennonites, Hernhutters, and so on, but there are Always enough left - they multiply like pests. And that makes me think what effect they have on natural selection....  

Comment by sk8eycat on June 9, 2013 at 12:02am

Joan, I love that sly NSA graphic, even though the situation itself scares the *bleep!* outta me.  I have nothing to hide, but I remember how the KGB used to operate, and one of my usual sarcastic remarks could be misunderstood if overheard...and taken seriously...and I'm too old to put up with their brand of interror-gation.

***************

I also can relate to your post about "people-pleasing."  We talked about that a lot when I was going to 12-step meetings for Adult Children of Alcoholics (ACA).  It's a behavioral symptom of some sort of childhood dysfunctional family stuff.

In my own case, I was never physically or emotionally abused, but I believed that if I could just do the right thing, like get better grades in school, my dad would stop drinking.  He was a "quiet" alcoholic...no yelling, or physical tantrums, but he just wasn't "there."  He did finally dry out when I was 20, and I went to work for him...learning bookkeeping...for 7 years.  Till he fell off the wagon, and I ran away again.  (Re-joined Holiday.)

When I was older I found myself dating guys who drank too much, and I finally realized that I was looking for someone like my father.

Then there were a few who tried to control me...my beliefs and taste in entertainment.

I ran like hell from all of them.  I didn't know why at the time, but I guess it was just self-preservation.  I couldn't imagine myself spending my life with any of them (and having their children. Gack!).

D'ruther have a non-physical relationship with a gay man...or men, except I'm a lousy roommate.  The only reason my sister and I are able to live together is that we leave each other alone.

Anyway, I didn't understand why I did what I did till I started talking to other people who'd been through the same sort of things.  ACA really did help for a couple of years, till I got tired of all the "god talk."  and fore, it wasn't like AA where you have to keep going to meetings for the rest of your life.  I just needed to step back and take a good look at myself, and figure out why I kept putting myself in people-pleasing "doormat" situations. And stop it.

I wan't pleasing anybody, anyway.  Especially not myself.

Comment by Ruth Anthony-Gardner on June 8, 2013 at 11:33pm

ROFL, too right, Joan, "the only part of government that listens."

It was inevitable that government would spy on all of us, with today's connectivity. My solution is that the more power an individual has the more his or her life should be an open book. It should go both ways. It's the imbalance of information power that disturbs me, not the spying per se. If corporate honchos and politicians had absolutely no privacy they couldn't abuse this power.

Comment by booklover on June 8, 2013 at 8:09pm

I know, right Joseph?!  I'm embarrassed that our country is known for being so religious.  I'm sure the religious people are PROUD of that fact.  Ugh.

Comment by Joseph Corder on June 8, 2013 at 7:40pm

sk8eycat, Oh yes, great speech!  Very humble!  I loved the parts about adding the inconsistencies up and coming to the conclusion that it's B.S.  I can relate!  I was raised as a Methodist( the very liberal style), but my parents weren't that religious.  My parents never held us back from learning and NEVER bitched about our choices pertaining to religion!  My biggest mistake is believing that people didn't take this shit seriously!  One of my worst days of my life was when I found out that the U.S. is the most religious nation on earth!!!  Fu**in sad!!!

Comment by sk8eycat on June 8, 2013 at 1:57pm

Joseph, Here's Ron Reagan, Jr.'s speech when he accepted his "Emperor Has No Clothes" award at the 2009 FFRF convention in Seattle:

http://ffrf.org/outreach/awards/emperor-has-no-clothes-award/item/1...

I think Ronald Reagan Sr. (AND Richard Nixon) would be considered much too liberal for today's GOP.  And Eisenhower would have been tarred, feathered, and run out of town on a rail for his prophetic warning about the "military-industrial complex."

Comment by Ian Mason on June 8, 2013 at 12:51pm

Joan, that's a post with a very sharp point. Good one.

Comment by Joseph Corder on June 8, 2013 at 12:37pm

The other day, I was checking out the Evil Bible site http://www.evilbible.com/  and found out that Ron Reagan Jr. is an Atheist!!  He was asked when he quit going to church.  "At age 12, I told my father that I am no longer going to church, because I am an Atheist!!!!!  I can only imagine what the look on his father had.  Too bad Ron didn't have a camera!  " Hey dad, I am an Atheist, SAY CHEESE!!!!!!

 

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