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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 852
Latest Activity: 1 hour ago

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

Seeing Things (TheraminTrees)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner on Thursday. 2 Replies

TheraminTrees doesn't release videos very often these days,  but when he does, they are positive GEMS.  Most recent of his works is the following, wherein he dismantles some of the common rebuttals atheist get from believers when we assert our…Continue

Tags: seeing things, YouTube, TheraminTrees

Let's not define ourselves or others by our worst behaviors

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Feb 15. 4 Replies

My take on the recent melt down at Hang With Friends, of which I missed part, is that some of us were tripped up by a habit of thought. It's something we learn growing up, and use without realizing how much pain it can generate -  failing to…Continue

Tags: dispute at Hang With Friends

You'll NEVER Guess Who Just Showed Up on Mr. Deity!!!

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Loren Miller Feb 14. 11 Replies

I don't believe this one either, but ... well, here it is: And would you believe - Mr. D made me laugh!  RD, that is!Continue

Tags: Richard Dawkins, Mr. Deity

Seth Andrews' Rebuttal to "10 Women Christian Men Shouldn't Marry" (The Thinking Atheist)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Loren Miller Feb 6. 20 Replies

It seems as though some numb-nuts New York pastor by the name of Stephen Kim has written two marriage advice pieces for christian men and women.  Not surprisingly, his suggestions come straight out of his never-fail magic book.  Seth Andrews of The…Continue

Tags: advice, marriage, The Thinking Atheist, Seth Andrews, Stephen Kim

Seth Andrews' New Book, "Sacred Cows" (The Thinking Atheist)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Patricia Feb 6. 7 Replies

For the last few podcasts, Seth Andrews has been alluding to a new literary effort he's been working on.  Well, the cat is out of the bag ... or perhaps I should say, the cow is out of the barn!  Seth's new opus is entitled: Sacred Cows: a…Continue

Tags: book, Sacred Cows, The Thinking Atheist, Seth Andrews

Living in the Answers

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Patricia Jan 18. 13 Replies

I am weary of those who declare they understand all the answers to the creation of the universe and Earth. They claim they know the answers to the questions of life, meaning, death, and the afterlife. Those with all the answer speak with confidence,…Continue

Tags: confidence, education, government, family, afterlife

Comment Wall

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You need to be a member of Hang With Friends to add comments!

Comment by The Flying Atheist on November 24, 2013 at 2:35pm

Steph, cute picture of the cats under the umbrella.  I saw you are getting rain in your area.  Supposedly that weather system is predicted to continue northeast and screw up holiday travel plans on the East Coast in the next few days.  We shall see.  Have a great day. 

Mindy, I hope you feel better soon.  I hate being sick.  It depresses me.  I feel like it's wasted time......but what can you do?  BTW, don't be mad, but I confess that I hate football.  Yes, "hate" is a strong word, but I've chosen it wisely.  I hope we can still be friends!  As you are aware, Chicago is a HUGE sports town, but I've never had any interest whatsoever in any sports.  If I wasn't the last, I was the second-to-last kid to be chosen in gym or on the playground for sports teams.  It was an aspect of my life that I not only accepted but that I embraced.  Give me music and art anytime!    

Joan, when people hear truths they don't like or don't want to be true they get angry and defensive.  Good for you for always speaking out and keeping your integrity intact.  I'm glad to hear that some of your soured relationships have been restored.  Perhaps you've been successful in planting a few seeds of knowledge and rationality.  You have so much to offer other people. 

It's cold here too.  Overnight it was 13-degrees.  It's now warmed up to 25 with sunny skies.     

Comment by Joan Denoo on November 24, 2013 at 1:37pm

Steph, loved your comment and photo of cats sitting and enjoying rain. Looks like paradise. Yes, I agree that this site is a very special one, full of thoughtful, caring, compassionate people who have open minds and not so open that their brains fall out. 

It is very cold here, clear skies, not so much wind, yet. I probably will lose some plants because of the low day and night temps. Well, if the climate changes, we will be losing a lot of plants because of water or temperature changes. I might as well get used to it. 

Comment by Joan Denoo on November 24, 2013 at 1:26pm

Oh! Mindy! I understand your reasons for leaving Facebook. The hate mail can be dreadful! Thankfully, there is a "Block" button to weed out filth. 
I kind of like those who attempt to give me rational reasons for disliking my writings. It gives me a chance to reconsider my thinking and either agree or disagree with them and why. Over time, I feel stronger in my thinking. I do often realize I have overstated or made a reasoning mistake. As to feelings, there can be no mistakes in how one feels. The feelings may be based on erroneous thinking, but if so, I am able to make changes in my own thinking and come out stronger. 

My experience with Facebook was it was far too conservative for my liking, and I just didn't want to listen to a bunch of delusions. I blocked them as well. Family and friends sent me all kinds of sickeningly sweet, syrupy, mawkish, sentimental, trite, saccharine things that made my teeth itch. I wrote them individually and told them I did not think their material made any sense and didn't stand up to scrutiny. I would block them in the future if I got any more of it. Well, you can guess ... a lot of family and friends unfriended me.

Slowly, over time, many of those individuals reconnected with me and send me thoughtful (full-of-thought) comments, and we restored our relationship, to my benefit, and I hope theirs.  

Thanks to people like you and ... oh dear, I won't list names because I will surely leave some very precious friends out. I have been able to rethink my positions and make appropriate adjustments. 

Arguing does me no good! Asking question, pointing out what, how, and why I do not share an idea, helps me, even if it infuriates another. I love to challenge another to think, even as I love being challenged ... if based on reason.

Feelings are another matter. One can not argue with how another feels; it is their reality. I can look at my own feelings and listen for what they tell me. Why am I angry, sad, mad, afraid, guilty or ashamed? When I sort those kinds of things out, I have a better understanding of what drives me. 

Honesty seems to have great power. Especially for my cousins, many of whom are very active in their churches. One married a Lutheran minister with patriarchal ethics. In her email comments she sounds depressed and unhappy and wonders why. I can read how dominated she feels, even though she doesn't say it. I simply ask her questions about her feelings, and her values. She hangs in with me until she gets angry (which really means she is afraid). 
No one said growing up would be easy. There are no good roadmaps. The holy books lead one astray, filling the head with nonsense that I call The Passive Gospel. So, we can be active in thought and action. We can celebrate together our stressors and accomplishments. We can stand as a cloud of witnesses for each other, with encouragement, information, ideas, ...jeez, I had a terrible time finding a secular word cloud: 
Comment by Steph S. on November 24, 2013 at 10:30am

Good thing you got away from Facebook. The Nexus site is so much better. I hope everyone is having a good day. IT is rainy and cold here today.

Comment by Idaho Spud on November 23, 2013 at 6:32pm

Ruth, thanks for the explanation of "like".  Someone said that it was connected to facebook, so I was concerned, even though I never found any of my Nexus likes on facebook.  Your explanation reduces my concern even more.

Comment by Ruth Anthony-Gardner on November 23, 2013 at 5:26pm

The "like" button does two things. It tells everyone you liked that, in the Latest Activity and adds to the like count for that thing. If you want to go back to it later, a shortcut is stored under "Likes" on your profile page. Well, also someone could look at your likes from your page to get an idea of your preferences.

Comment by Steph S. on November 23, 2013 at 5:15pm

Love the cats with books and tea cup. Enjoy the posts here.

Patricia I love owls too and enjoy that GIF.

Yes, Mindy we are real friends here and support you. Always thinking about you and wish you the best.

My thoughts are with everyone here.

Comment by Steph S. on November 23, 2013 at 5:12pm

Comment by The Flying Atheist on November 23, 2013 at 2:43am

Just got back in town and reading what I missed. 

Mindy, as horrible as it is to have your daughter come to you in tears, the fact that she feels comfortable enough to emotionally express herself to you says so much about you personally.  In a different scenario she might choose to shut you out and not communicate at all, which I know would be even worse for both of you.  But she hasn't done that.  She trusts you.  You are there when she needs you.  You strongly support her both on good days and bad days.   You're a wonderful mother, Mindy.  You have a very special, close-knit family and your daughter benefits from such a solid and trusting foundation.  I do wish her well.  Hopefully in the near future she will find the right combination of workable tools to minimize and combat these issues.  And great news from your son!  You must all be very proud.  

Sk8eycat, thanks for sharing your very personal details.  Understanding and being aware of others' experiences helps everybody.  I have great admiration for you as well and I always look forward to reading your posts.      

Comment by Joan Denoo on November 23, 2013 at 1:54am

Felaine, what a sweet picture! And an excellent cellebration of Mindy's good news.

Mindy, I am happy for you and your son. Good job of homeschooling and your efforts return to you in a wonderful way. 

Thinking about your daughter and hoping she is finding joy. 

Cheetah Purring

 

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