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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 852
Latest Activity: yesterday

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

Surreal, I haz it

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner May 6. 82 Replies

Surreal, not just found in art.Continue

Tags: surreal

Let's not define ourselves or others by our worst behaviors

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Dominique Lutz Apr 16. 6 Replies

My take on the recent melt down at Hang With Friends, of which I missed part, is that some of us were tripped up by a habit of thought. It's something we learn growing up, and use without realizing how much pain it can generate -  failing to…Continue

Tags: dispute at Hang With Friends

The FLDS Cult Is Unraveling

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Idaho Spud Mar 29. 3 Replies

The FLDS Cult Is Unraveling"the internet is a lifeline for people trapped in the most restrictive and stifling forms of…Continue

Tags: Warren Jeff, internet, FLDS

Ode to Yahweh (Non Stamp Collector & 43alley)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Joan Denoo Mar 24. 1 Reply

Ages ago (five or six years, I guess it is) when I first started recognizing my own atheism, one of the first atheist YouTubers I ran onto was Non Stamp Collector.  His handiwork wasn't up to Disney's standards, nor even Hanna-Barbera, but his wit…Continue

Tags: Yahweh, YouTube, 43alley, Non Stamp Collector

Oregon Field Guide - Lamprey Decline

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Mar 15. 3 Replies

Oregon Field Guide - Lamprey Decline"Populations of Eel-like lamprey have suddenly plummeted since the year 2000 in the Columbia Basin, surprising…Continue

Richard Dawkins, Growing Up in the Universe

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Joan Denoo Mar 14. 2 Replies

Here is an oldie, the young Richard Dawkins teaching kids about the universe. I especially like the one demonstrating how the eye evolved. This should answer those who believe it was impossible to evolve an eye. Continue

Tags: universe, teaching, Dawkins, Richard

Comment Wall

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Comment by Idaho Spud on May 16, 2014 at 1:26pm

Joan, It struck a nerve with me when he said if a mother is stressed, the child will have a smaller brain and the part of the brain that handles stress will be much smaller, so it will take that person longer to get their stress under control, when faced with a stressor.

That describes me.  I think my mother was under stress when carrying me.  For one thing, she was afraid of strangers.  I can remember her taking me and hiding in the closet when a salesman would knock.  

Comment by Joan Denoo on May 16, 2014 at 5:18am

Robert Sapolsky discusses "Dutch Hunger Winter" in this video. Start at about 50:00 and he explain the behavioral genetics of stress on pregnant mothers and how the genetic linkages change and last for several generations. 

Comment by Plinius on May 16, 2014 at 1:17am

I didn't know, Joan, thanks for the link. What I noticed about people who lived through the 30s crisis and WWII is a strong tendency to hoard; food, medicine, money, anything that might be useful. Doompreppers. When my mother died she left behind hundreds of margerine packages, empty and neatly cleaned and stacked. Still don't know what she wanted with those.

Comment by Joan Denoo on May 15, 2014 at 11:30pm

Chris, I am sure you know about Traces of Dutch 'Hunger Winter' in genetic material, however, many of us may not know of the facts of that terrible event and the consequences. 

"Conditions in the uterus can give rise to life-long changes in genetic material. People in their sixties who were conceived during the Hunger Winter of 1944-45 in the Netherlands have been found to have a different molecular setting for a gene which influences growth. Researchers from the LUMC are the first to demonstrate this effect. They published their findings this week in PNAS Online Early Edition, together with colleagues from Columbia University."

It is not a new finding, as indicated in this article. People who have studied the effects of hunger on populations have known about this for as long as I have been in the field. What is new is the realization that people, today, are impacted by the effects of that winter 1944-5 in Holland because of genetic changes that occurred during that famine. A new set-point was created in the genetic pool during that pregnancy that continues into today's descendants of that generation

II remember very well that year when British and USA planes dropped food onto Holland because the Germans had taken the food supplies to feed the starving of Germany. My family sent packages to family members in Belgium during that period which included warm clothing, homemade quilts out of old coats, and foods of various kinds. We were on rationing, so sugars and oils were very scarce. 

Comment by k.h. ky on May 15, 2014 at 4:09pm
And, no, fa, she didn't agree. If she had there would be no problem now.
Comment by k.h. ky on May 15, 2014 at 4:07pm
Thanks folks. FA, my daughter was close to my mom but I don't believe any of the other 13 could have came to an an agreement had they been asked. The g kids are all adults. I don't feel they had any say so in it.
sk8ycat, I'm with you on abortion rights.
Patricia, in Ky next of kin can override last wishes, even those made at the funeral home by prior directive. I have a deceased friend whose family did just that.
I think my daughter being an only child is the reason she thinks she should be included in any decisions.
Comment by sk8eycat on May 15, 2014 at 1:50pm
Comment by sk8eycat on May 15, 2014 at 12:52pm

I joined the Neptune Society 20 years ago, and am completely paid up...that includes dumping my ashes at sea.  BUT I told my sister I didn't care if she flushed them down the loo if she wanted to.

Ghod, I'm SO glad I never had kids!  Abortion IS a blessing, even when it was illegal (as mine were).

Comment by The Flying Atheist on May 15, 2014 at 12:35pm

K.H., I don't think it was unreasonable at all having just the five siblings make the burial decision for your mother.  Just the fact that there were disagreements among the five of you is quite enough without bringing in 14 additional opinions!  I'm curious of the reason why your daughter is so upset over this.  Did she not agree with the final decision?  Is that why she is stating she should have been consulted as well?  Is she the lone voice in this or is she speaking on behalf of the 14 grandchildren?  In any case, I don't think you or your siblings have done anything egregious.  It's fairly standard to have the closest "next of kin" make those decisions unless otherwise stated elsewhere.  This is a perfect example of why everyone should have their final wishes spelled out in a will. 

Comment by k.h. ky on May 15, 2014 at 10:12am
I am in need of an outside perspective. When my mom died last year my five siblings and l disagreed on where to bury her. We went by majority vote and we're all fine with that. However.. My daughter, one of 14 grandchildren, has been a bitch about it. She thinks all the g kids should have been included in the decision. I don't think they had any say so in the matter. My daughter and I have had a couple of disagreements about it over the last year with the last one getting rather nasty. I told her when I died she could do whatever the hell she wanted but that was my mother. Am I wrong or is she being unrealistic?
 

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