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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 837
Latest Activity: 6 hours ago

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

Your favorite photobombs?

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Aug 25. 10 Replies

Running of the bulls photobomb.Continue

Are you battling cancer or a cancer survivor?

Started by Worrall Travel Rs - Roz and Russ. Last reply by Worrall Travel Rs - Roz and Russ Aug 22. 14 Replies

Happily, I am now a five year breast cancer survivor, and I am thankful to my friends, family, my health care team, and to science and medical discoveries. Dealing with cancer and treatment is never easy and it's damned scary, but it is easier when…Continue

what boobs are good for

Started by dr kellie. Last reply by Bertold Brautigan Aug 21. 77 Replies

I discovered a brilliant new way to avoid  having xians ring my doorbell in attempt to share the good news with me.  Just now, I was in my kitchen, washing dishes and finding something to eat, when I looked out the large window above my sink.  Two…Continue

Surreal, I haz it

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Aug 6. 76 Replies

Surreal, not just found in art.Continue

Tags: surreal

Eat vegetables, Be happy

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Plinius Aug 1. 9 Replies

An association between the amount of fruit and vegetables people ate and their happiness? Yes indeed. People who ate 7 portions of fruits and/or vegetables a day were the happiest.…Continue

Tags: vegetables, fruit, diet, happiness

Comment Wall

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Comment by sk8eycat on April 25, 2014 at 5:50pm

Patricia, is this a NIGHT trip?  Or will you be able to enjoy the scenery?  Either way, relax, and have a grand time!

Comment by Steph S. on April 25, 2014 at 4:24pm

Patricia have a safe trip. Be safe.

Comment by Steph S. on April 25, 2014 at 4:23pm

Mindy she sounds like a shallow "friend" - I don't think you should take her back as friend. I think the time has passed and you are older and more mature now. Look forward to better friends in the future who like you for who you are.

Comment by booklover on April 25, 2014 at 4:05pm

As always, great advice Joan!  Hugs.

Patricia, have a good time and safe travels!

Comment by Joan Denoo on April 25, 2014 at 3:05pm

Mindy, You are just very fine! What you feel is what you feel and you can honor that without guilt. If you want her for a friend, by all means make that choice. If you don't want to, or not now, make that choice. You don't have to explain anything. Just make your statement and go on with life. 
About the anxiety attack, a good counselor can help you with that. Basically, sit quietly, paying attention to your breath. When a thought comes to mind, thank it for visiting and dismiss it away. It takes a lot of practice to get to the point where you can just sit, relaxed, breathing easily, and letting go of thoughts. That static in your mind can wear you out. 

Mindfulness Strategies

I like Chris' response: a hug, even virtual, is coming your way from me and I am sure all of us on this string. 

Ruth gives very good advice, and based on healthy communication skills. She is right on target about being honest with yourself and then letting her know. 

Patricia always has strong responses and, by golly, she is right. I really like what she said. You are who you are. Period.

Felaine has good sense as well ... goodness, we are lucky to have such trustworthy and wise friends. She advises using the Block button on Facebook and that is a great idea.

So, you have a lot of options and even more if you need to find a better way. However, there are some good options here to kick around. You are not a victim. You have everything you need to come out of this a winner. Sit back, enjoy that you have breath, celebrate your life, and experience the gratitude of strong family and friends. 

I just read your response and it seems you have been able to quiet your thoughts and get your anxiety down. Remember, anxiety is a symptom of feeling helpless. To feel optimistic is the goal. The method to achieve your goal lies within the symptoms. Look for mad, glad, sad, afraid, guilt, shame and you will usually find the cause of your anxiety. 
 

Comment by Idaho Spud on April 25, 2014 at 3:03pm

See ya Patricia.  Have fun.

Comment by Patricia on April 25, 2014 at 2:58pm

Well if you didn't like her much to begin with, then it should be a no-brainer.

Anyway, will finish packing & be ready to leave for the bus depot in a couple of hours. See you all on Monday.

Comment by booklover on April 25, 2014 at 2:16pm

Thanks Chris!  Hugs to you too!!! <3

Ruth,  I don't miss being young, but I need to work on being a little thinner, just for health.  I just really never liked her much, and I don't want to see her or talk to her.  So, I guess I answered my own question.  Thank you! You are such a nice friend. :)

Patricia, I LOVE your say it like it is style!  I did take your advice and went through my short friends list, and only kept a very few people who I enjoy sharing jokes and pictures with, which mostly include my sister, niece, etc. You're terrific!

And Felaine, you are absolutely correct!  I dumped her 22 years ago, and I DO worry too much!  And this is me on meds for that! lol.  I'm glad you are my friend.

So I will look at FB to get good stuff to share with you guys, and play a few games with my sister (Words with Friends is like Scrabble), and share a few jokes, etc.  Otherwise, AN is the place where the best friends to have are!!! <3 <3 <3

Comment by sk8eycat on April 25, 2014 at 1:58pm

Mindy, friendship, like love, should be unconditional. 

If somebody places conditions on how they should behave toward you, they are NOT True Friends.  DUMP THEM!  I have done that several times in the past 50+ years, and it may have hurt at first (but it usually hurt because they had done something to hurt me and/or mine), but it made life much easier in the long run.

You are a GOOD person, but you worry too much!  If you need FlakeBook to keep in touch with your extended family, limit it to just them, and block everyone else...if that can be done.

That site makes me very nervous; IMO it's useless except for small commercial and non-profit (animal rescue) enterprises.  I'm usually a very private person; I don't want Jack Schidt and his 10,000,000 friends to know what I'm thinking and doing...or not doing. I stick to e-mail to stay in touch. 

And this place.

Comment by Patricia on April 25, 2014 at 1:26pm

Going back is not possible.....I've tried it......doesn't work. Facebook seems to be an issue as well & nobody forces anyone to keep going there to risk contact with people not wanted. If no contact or renewal is of any interest, then why reply with a life story inviting more contact?

I'd like to be thinner too, but that is not my reality at this point in time. My weight, good or bad, is nobody's business but mine. As for what I look like, that is also nobody else's business, & I don't give a flying fig what people think.

As for facebook, I'd have absolutely nothing to do with that damn site.

 

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