Comment by Sarah on July 19, 2012 at 2:26pm

Booklover, I'm sorry you found so much offense in my comment. You did, though, convey here, at least, that it was egotistical of him to think he has all the answers and that you found no more value in talking to him as a result. And that much of this view is based on his age versus yours. I don't think it's unreasonable to surmise that it's at least possible he felt that attitude and responded to it. And really, if you read my comment carefully, you would note that I wasn't suggesting that is what happened, but that I would have responded that way at 17.

You're certainly not making me feel like my views are at all worth considering or have any merit, simply because I disagree with you. Aren't we supposed to be free-thinkers? As such, shouldn't we at least be open to the idea that other people might have different ideas and different views that are worth hearing? I don't want to go through life shutting out everyone who says something I disagree with.

Again, I'm sorry you were offended by my comment, but you haven't exactly helped your case by writing me off as someone to ignore based on one comment.

Comment by The Flying Atheist on July 19, 2012 at 2:30pm

Sk8eycat.....was Jerry Falwell a used car salesman at one time?  Or where you just implying that he sounded like one?  BTW, I loved what Hitchens had to say about Falwell after he died.  http://youtu.be/52yTqMcwuQE

I'm reminded again about how much Hitchens is missed.  Absolutely no other person would dare go on television and say the things he said with such conviction and eloquence. 

Comment by Patricia on July 19, 2012 at 2:34pm

Booklover....he's a child, & someone else's as well, & speaking for myself, I wouldn't get into it in any shape or form with any know-it-all let alone someone I had just met. I certainly wouldn't lend him any books when the internet has plenty of reading for free. Asperger's or not, I don't feel it would be my place to start with another person's minor kid, especially on a short visit.  

Comment by The Flying Atheist on July 19, 2012 at 2:56pm

Booklover....I remember myself when I was seventeen and into my early 20's.  I thought I was on top of the world and knew it all, however I don't recall being overly egotistical.  That's a personality trait I've never really had.  (At least I think so.)  However, some people are just plain egotistical at ANY age and express it openly.  This young man may grow up, become wiser about the ways of the world and still be obnoxiously egotistical.  I hope the remainder of his visit with you goes smoothly.        

Comment by Idaho Spud on July 19, 2012 at 3:50pm

The Flying Atheist, thanks for the link to Hitchens on Falwell.  I've not seen it before, and also love it.  Hitchens was great.

Comment by booklover on July 19, 2012 at 4:57pm

Umm no Sarah, I did not convey that I found no value in talking to him anymore.  I said I wouldn't talk to him anymore, as he has all the answers.  Also, he is my sons guest, and I don't care to take up my sons time with him.  The visit is going just fine, I just don't care to speak to a know-it-all about something he doesn't know all about.

And, lol, as for your 'surmising', he couldn't have formed an opinion that I was looking down on him, as he didn't even listen to me. I spoke a few sentences, he told us all he was right, then he left to use the restroom, and my Mom and I agreed we wouldn't speak about it again with him.

As far as your surmising, your opinion, etc.  you weren't there and so you made-up a scenario, and no, it's not worth listening to.  It's as if you decided how the whole thing went and then picked a 'side', as if you knew anything about it.

I don't have a 'case' that needs to be 'helped', lol.  I was just told a story and you were the only one who made-up what happened, then gave an opinion on it, and then disagreed with me about something that didn't even happen.  WOW.  Please don't respond to me, and I won't respond to you.  Your 'apology' is insincere, and we don't have to like everyone on AN.  Life is too short, so have a good one.

@ Patricia, I totally agree, I am not going to lend him anything.  He has turned out to be just fine as a guest, but I have found he knows the most about EVERYTHING.  Coffee, driving, books, etc. lol.  I will be curious as to how my son feels about him having met him 'in real life'.  I won't tell my son I didn't care for him.  The kid is not a bad person at all, just a know-it-all.

Comment by Patricia on July 19, 2012 at 5:34pm

Booklover....nothing to do with atheism, but I did not choose my kids friends, & there were a few I just didn't like.

When my youngest was about 16 or 17, he asked if one of his pals could come camping with us one summer as he wanted someone his own age along. We said sure, even though we didn't much care for this kid.

It took all of a day & a half for my son to find out he didn't like him anymore either!!! When we camp, everyone has to pitch in & help with setting up, getting wood, helping with meals, keeping things tidy, etc., etc. This kid wanted nothing but to eat everything in sight & be waited on hand foot & anything else his little heart desired. That went over reeeeeeaaaalllllly big!!!! Hahahaha!!!!

After we had to come home early as he'd eaten us out of all of our food, my son dropped him right quick!!!! No loss....I say!!!! 

Comment by booklover on July 19, 2012 at 5:49pm

@ Patricia, lol.  This 'kid' is 17 and lives many states away.  He and my son and a bunch of other 'kids' are friends from XBOX Live of all things.  They have been for years.  There is another kid here from California.  THey are all friends.  Sorta cool they could all get together, but I personally would NEVER let my kid go visit someone I didn't know.  They are all mostly over at another friends house (the one hosting the guy from California).  Luckily I won't have to 'host' again for at least a year! lol.  Sorry about your fun situation with your son's friend.  At least that's over!!!!

Comment by Patricia on July 19, 2012 at 7:17pm

Booklover....the thing was....my son had told him up front that everyone had to pitch in with the chores etc., so it's not as if it was a surprise. We hadn't even gotten out of the truck yet when we got to the lake & he was asking 'when do we eat?' My husband said no food until we set camp, so this guy promptly hid in the outhouse for an hour or so while we pitched the tents. I just knew then that things weren't going to go well. At least my son learned something without us having to say a word.

I agree there, I wouldn't let my kids go to stay with someone unknown to us while under age, but that's us.

Comment by Sarah on July 19, 2012 at 11:49pm

Honestly, book lover, I wouldn't respond to you again as you seem like a judgmental person. But you don't get to tell me who I can and can't respond to. Sheesh, I'm starting to think this kid is lucky that you won't talk to him again. I fail to see the difference between saying you see no value in talking to him again versus you won't talk to him again. I don't think I have read anything into your comments or misinterpreted them, so I guess we'll have to agree to disagree about what you've conveyed.

I'm sorry I had the nerve to speak up and think it wasn't very nice to trash a kid by calling him an egotistical know-it-all when most 17 yos probably also think they have all the answers.

I really thought this site would be a welcoming spot where diversity of opinion and free thinking would be valued. But I'm finding it's a closed clique where newbies aren't welcome and people tune out anyone who doesn't fall lock-step in line with their thinking.

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