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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 852
Latest Activity: 48 minutes ago

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

Surreal, I haz it

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner 48 minutes ago. 82 Replies

Surreal, not just found in art.Continue

Tags: surreal

Let's not define ourselves or others by our worst behaviors

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Dominique Lutz Apr 16. 6 Replies

My take on the recent melt down at Hang With Friends, of which I missed part, is that some of us were tripped up by a habit of thought. It's something we learn growing up, and use without realizing how much pain it can generate -  failing to…Continue

Tags: dispute at Hang With Friends

The FLDS Cult Is Unraveling

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Idaho Spud Mar 29. 3 Replies

The FLDS Cult Is Unraveling"the internet is a lifeline for people trapped in the most restrictive and stifling forms of…Continue

Tags: Warren Jeff, internet, FLDS

Ode to Yahweh (Non Stamp Collector & 43alley)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Joan Denoo Mar 24. 1 Reply

Ages ago (five or six years, I guess it is) when I first started recognizing my own atheism, one of the first atheist YouTubers I ran onto was Non Stamp Collector.  His handiwork wasn't up to Disney's standards, nor even Hanna-Barbera, but his wit…Continue

Tags: Yahweh, YouTube, 43alley, Non Stamp Collector

Oregon Field Guide - Lamprey Decline

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Mar 15. 3 Replies

Oregon Field Guide - Lamprey Decline"Populations of Eel-like lamprey have suddenly plummeted since the year 2000 in the Columbia Basin, surprising…Continue

Richard Dawkins, Growing Up in the Universe

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Joan Denoo Mar 14. 2 Replies

Here is an oldie, the young Richard Dawkins teaching kids about the universe. I especially like the one demonstrating how the eye evolved. This should answer those who believe it was impossible to evolve an eye. Continue

Tags: universe, teaching, Dawkins, Richard

Comment Wall

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Comment by Joan Denoo on August 4, 2012 at 11:46pm

sk8eycat, I misread your sentence on Aspie, and am sorry I read it so carelessly. However, I am interested in how it is for you. 
OH! You have already responded. I shall get back to you after I read your comment. 

Comment by sk8eycat on August 4, 2012 at 11:38pm

Joan...my sister has never been able to drive a car, work outside the home (except to peddle Watchtowers), control her temper, form any lasting relationships except with a small number of people in her congregation.  Has never been on a date with anyone of any sex.

As an infant and toddler, she didn't like being held, she'd push Mother away when given a hug.

She does love our cats, and the neighbors' dogs, has a memory like a steel trap.  Doesn't "nurse" a grudge, she cherishes them; she still talks about a first grade teacher who was "mean" to her.  I have told her and told her that I had the same teacher 5 years before she did, and she was "mean" (strict) with everybody.  Doesn't register; she loves feeling victimized.  For a long time her hobby was Musical Doctors...every time some new condition would be in the news, she thought she had it, got a checkup, and when her doctor told her she didn't have...chronic fatigue syndrome, or fibromyalgia, or whatever, she'd pitch a fir and go shopping for a new doctor.

And during all this time NObody in the USA had ever heard of Asperger's Syndrome, even though it was first described in 1944...the year she was born.  But Dr. Asperger was in Austria, and "there was a war on."

She's never been diagnosed because JWs don't go in for things like neuropsychiatry, but MY doctor an MY therapist have told me her behavior is "classic."

Too late to do anything about it now except accept that that is the way she is, and try to live with it.  I was pretty much on my own from 1957 till the mid-'80s when our parents started needing help, and I moved back in the house. 

When dad had a catastrophic stroke, and the EMTs were wheeling him out of the house for the last time, she went in her room and closed the door.  He lived another 3 months, but she never visited him in the hospital.  Didn't ever visit Mother all the times she was hospitalized, either.

But she knows a hell of a lot about astronomy....   [shrugs]

Comment by dr kellie on August 4, 2012 at 10:38pm

Joan, her sister is an Aspie.  My brother was, too.

 

My resonse to the door bell ringers is to go to the door topless.  They really run off.  I might have to stop when I get older and don't like going topless.  I think I have a few more years:)

Comment by Joan Denoo on August 4, 2012 at 10:32pm

sk8eycat, I had to look up, "Aspie" and read a couple of articles suggested by Google. Can you, if you want to, describe what Aspie means to you, how you experience it, does stress cause you problems, other than usual. Do you experience unusual giftedness in some area of your life? How has it held you back, and how has it put you forward?  I hope these aren't too personal. If so, just tell me to mind my own business. 
I like your business card idea, as well. 
Someone suggested a response to a religious person, "I respect you too much to not tell you I disagree with your statement." 

Comment by sk8eycat on August 4, 2012 at 9:24pm

I quit believing in the supernatural about 50 years ago, and then I noticed commentators on TV (when they still had real people doing the news...mostly) sometimes saying "Well, I don't agree with his beliefs, but I have to respect him for them."  And I started asking myself, "WHY?"  It was sort of their form of the knee-jerk, "Any religion is better than none" crap.  So I came up with this:

OKAY, I RESPECT YOUR RIGHT TO BELIEVE WHATEVER MAKES YOU FEEL IMPORTANT, BUT I DO NOT HAVE TO RESPECT WHAT YOU BELIEVE!

I should print it on business-size cards to hand out to the doorbell-ringers. 

(Oh, my nerves!  You all KNOW that my sister, who lives with me, is a Jehovah's Witless, AND an Aspie.  Such fun!)

Comment by sk8eycat on August 4, 2012 at 4:14pm

Oh, Melinda, don't do that to your mouth! It will damage your teeth. He's a self-righteous son of a something (I will NOT insult female dogs!), and not worth it.  I just wish the people in the stadium would boo and laugh at him.  Show-off.

The real thing that's p*ssing me off about quitting driving is that I really haven't saved all that much money.  Okay, no taxes, no gasoline, no insurance, no mantenance, BUT the price of food and meds keeps going up.

And when I quit driving last year I didn't have any cats...now I have two.  Good brands of litter are damned expensive; I won't use the clay crap...or even the crystals.  I get the brands that are biodegradable. (Wheat or Corn leavings...wonder what the disaster in the midwest is going to do to those products!)I am glad I adopted the old kitteh-men, though. Jerry is becoming a real comfort...just recently he's started sleeping in my arms, and that helps me go to sleep.  He's so soft!

Comment by sk8eycat on August 4, 2012 at 2:38pm

The "god did it" sounds too much like "god did it for ME."  It's very close to the theme of the last column Judy Hayes wrote titled, "I'm So blessed."  The kind of stupid things people say when they pass a test or something.  Yeah.  I'm blessed, and you're NOT.  Arrogant.

http://s129542369.onlinehome.us/thh/2012/05/31/im-so-blessed/

"God loves me and helped me win a gold-plated medal, and he lets 7 million children die of hunger and disease every year."

One of the things that opened my eyes 50 years ago was how self-centered Christians sounded to me when I stopped going to church regularly.  I cringed, and hoped I didn't do too much of that kind of god-talk when I was caught up in it.

*****************

When I was in Holiday, I used to see some of the European skaters quickly cross themselves just before the curtains opened for the opening number. I wodered if they were hoping it would help them skate well, or just protect them from falling on their a##es and looking stupid.

Comment by Ian Mason on August 4, 2012 at 1:31pm

Never really thought about it before reading posts here, this sport and God connection. Danish competitors have won a handfull of medals in rowing at the Olympics and have been interviewed for what seems like hours and all the talk is of "hard work" "deserved" "believed in ourselves" "believed we could" "a little bit of luck" and the like. The nearest there's been to religion has been a picture of two people praying (on others behalf) before an event. I can't imagine what it would be like hearing "God did it" so often.

Comment by The Flying Atheist on August 4, 2012 at 12:01pm

Sk8eycat, my little Toyota Corolla permanently went kaput eleven years ago and I never bothered to replace it.  I can't begin to imagine the amount of money I've saved by not having to pay for gas, insurance, municipal fees, and maintenance for ten-plus years.   

Comment by sk8eycat on August 4, 2012 at 11:27am

(Personal) News Item: I finally sold my old (and only) car to a wrecker yesterday.  I feel kinda like I had to have a pet euthanized....

BRB when I get used to it.

Felaine

 

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