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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 853
Latest Activity: 42 minutes ago

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

Seth Andrews' Rebuttal to "10 Women Christian Men Shouldn't Marry" (The Thinking Atheist)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Grinning Cat Jan 22. 13 Replies

It seems as though some numb-nuts New York pastor by the name of Stephen Kim has written two marriage advice pieces for christian men and women.  Not surprisingly, his suggestions come straight out of his never-fail magic book.  Seth Andrews of The…Continue

Tags: advice, marriage, The Thinking Atheist, Seth Andrews, Stephen Kim

Living in the Answers

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Patricia Jan 18. 13 Replies

I am weary of those who declare they understand all the answers to the creation of the universe and Earth. They claim they know the answers to the questions of life, meaning, death, and the afterlife. Those with all the answer speak with confidence,…Continue

Tags: confidence, education, government, family, afterlife

Twin terrorists caught

Started by Patricia. Last reply by Patricia Jan 11. 7 Replies

Canada: twin terrorists caught before going to Mideast Saturday, January 10, 2015 By Martin Barillas L-R: Carlos and Ashton Larmond The Royal Canadian Mounted Police arrested and charged a pair of 24-year-old identical twin brothers on…Continue

Betty Bowers Best of 2014

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Loren Miller Jan 4. 33 Replies

Happy New Year, everyone!  Now that we're off on another 365-day stint of sniping at believers, leave it to America's Best Christian, Betty Bowers, to sum up the year past from her holier-than-EVERYBODY point of view! Have You had YOUR Betty today?!?Continue

Tags: 2014, America's Best Christian, Betty Bowers

Christmas: Behind the Curtain (The Thinking Atheist)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by booklover Dec 28, 2014. 23 Replies

Well, it's that time of year again.  Time to gird our loins, put on our battle armor and join the (dah-dah DAAAAAH!) WAR AGAINST CHRISTMAS!!! [groan!] Yeah, most of us have heard that crap before, probably too many times, in fact, how atheists are…Continue

Tags: Christmas, The Thinking Atheist, Seth Andrews

Seth Andrews - The Copycats: How Christianity Steals The Best Ideas

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Loren Miller Dec 24, 2014. 11 Replies

Many of us have observed or learned how christianity shamelessly borrows from other sources to bolster its position and show off its supposed wonderfulness.  Well, Seth Andrews of The Thinking Atheist podcast has compiled some of the more modern-day…Continue

Tags: steal, borrow, copycat, The Thinking Atheist, Seth Andrews

Comment Wall

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Comment by sk8eycat on May 30, 2013 at 2:08am

Steph, I sent that Spock photo and quote to a friend who got to know Gene Roddenberry quite well, and this is her reply (LOL):

**********

This is why Gene Roddenberry was considered a "loose cannon" by NBC and Desilu, later by Paramount! He kept putting these comments into his scripts in hopes that some of them would get by the censors (oh, pardon me: Quality Control). -- Bjo
***********
My reply to Bjo, was:
I thought the NBC censors' dept. was called Broadcast Standards.  aka B.S.
*****************
I did tell you that I knew the guy who played "Ensign Hadley" (and the White Rabbit in "Shore Leave," and a lot of other extra roles in TOS) when I was in Holiday, didn't I?
 
He's on the far left in this HOI photo:
 
 

 
Comment by Joan Denoo on May 30, 2013 at 1:19am

My wonderful surgical and chemical oncologests looked me over today and I described the different feeling I have, not to complain, but to describe. One option is to change the chem formula and I said only if it doesn't reduce the probability of getting all the cancer cells. 
Had another dose of chemo today and feel good. Have some new strategies for handling the leaking problems. Laura and Laurie joined me for the procedure. Very nice company. 

Have an appointment tomorrow with the dietitian to work on problems. Did I tell you, fresh garlic eased my stomach cramping.  It turns out my harsh back pains were caused by the chemo to supplement my bone marrow. Knowing those pains caused by strengthening bone marrow, I can tolerate it. Here is where deep meditations and breathing come in handy. I surely don't want any more Rx's than I have to take. That pain will be kind of like having pains to have a baby, it is forgotten soon after birth, and/or healing of my immune system. 

I'm pooped, enjoyed reading your comments on a wide variety of topics. See you tomorrow. 

Comment by booklover on May 29, 2013 at 7:30pm

Here is a picture of my Daughter and Me (I am the brunette, ha ha) at our favorite restaurant tonight.  Hubby and Son are at the table too.  We had such a nice evening together! :)

Comment by sk8eycat on May 29, 2013 at 10:57am

Joan, forgive me, but your "Loess on the Palouse" made me think of this (by Stewart Moskowitz)

I have a print of this somewhere...

Comment by Joan Denoo on May 29, 2013 at 10:17am

We are a strong family because we all have skills that can be easily learned with disciplined, effective, and efficient thinking and acting. Some people think we have magic. Magic has absolutely nothing to do with the qualities of our family lives. 
I
t is hard work to learn how to be a mentally healthy, mature adult. It is an easy lifestyle with which to live. 
We are a happy group, devoted to each other and dedicated to the principles that each member is empowered to be who he/she is, without wearing masks, without denying each other's weaknesses and strengths, without expecting to be obedient and submissive to anyone else's rules and regulations, 
The Skill Set includes developing abilities such as recognizing a problem when it appears, setting some vision of what each one wants and needs for a solution, listening and speaking honestly with each other without the intent to submit to some role. 
To participate in creating a strong family, Each member of the family has to be able to express him/herself even as he/she can observes the needs and desires of others. It is not an obedient robot we try to raise to fit in society. It is to be a participating member of a family, community and Earth willing to learn. 

Notions of obedience, submission, domination, all are killer values that distort and bind the mind of its participants. 

Our key words are awareness, sustained positive effort, community, and critical thinking.

Another way to say it is being, doing, belonging, thinking.

Comment by Joan Denoo on May 29, 2013 at 10:12am

Chris, a wonderful travelogue, so full of images, and experiences. I agree with booklover, "You are very good at making one feel like they were there with you!"

Isn't a volcano fascinating. And add to it the history of its explosive past just makes it more enticing. Kind of like standing on the edge of Hell and not able to move my gaze away. In Hawaii, Goddess Pele used to demand virgin maidens to appease her, and thus not explode. There is mythology for you, always wanting virgin maidens, kind of like religions. 

Comment by booklover on May 29, 2013 at 9:21am

So many terrific posts!

Joan, no I haven't met my new Gastro yet.  I get to see mine one last time in August.  My daughter only has trouble with math, and we paid one of her best friends (another awesome guy named Carl!), to tutor her throughout the 8 weeks.  She's a whiz a anything else.  It's just when she get's depressed, she stops caring.  Ugh!

Patricia, so sad to lose an Atheist doctor!  My Gastro isn't an Atheist, but he's a Democrat and VERY pro-Union, my husband is a Teamster, so we've had some fun talks.  We both hate Wisconsin's Governer, Scott Walker. lol.

Chris, love the description of your vacation!  You are very good at making one feel like they were there with you!

Ruth, I'm not a Trekkie, but I love your pictures! :)

I'm just cleaning the house today, and hopefully thinking-up something for dinner!  I hope you all have a good day!~ Mindy

Comment by Plinius on May 29, 2013 at 1:59am

Holiday stories for Joan, and for everyone who likes them.              Naples is so beautiful. Most buildings are painted in earth colours, red, yellow and green, and the strong sun bleaches everything into an endless variety of shades. Many people make their outside space on balconies or terraces into another livingroom, so every apartment block is a display of chairs, tables and sunshades, decorated with pots of agave and bougainville. All that greenery is astonishing to me, even though the Netherlands are fertile. In and around Naples you can see orange and lemon trees and cactus figs in the smallest spaces, and it all grows like weeds. The mix of wealth and poverty also jumped at me: when I stepped outside our good hotel there was a boy with deformed feet on the pavement and a row of probably illegal immigrants wanting to sell whatever they had - umbrellas, lighters, sunglasses fastened on a piece of cardboard. One time I saw a signal going through the row - carabinieri I guess - they picked up their cardboards and were gone in seconds.

A trip up the Vesuvius is also a wonderful thing to do, quite an adventure for a flatlander like me! At about sea level you take a bus and in a quarter of an hour you're driven higher and higher through some villages and through many hairpin bends - you feel your ears popping now and then. Now you enter the national park of the Vesuvius, and a smaller bus brings you still higher, through the woods on the slopes - more hairpin bends, popping ears and dazzling views! In another quarter of an hour you're at 1100 metres, close to the top. Now the crater is only a 20 minute walk up a path of black volcanic stuff. It's not too steep, but bring a sweater! There's often a cloud on top of the mountain, and you climb into the cloud... On the crater rim you find a small shack where two young men in thick coats sell drinks, souvenirs and postcards (discoloured and curled up by the mist). They ask where you come from, and then they know the footballteam: Rotterdam - Feijenoord! Luckily my husband knew their team - Juventus.

In Pompei I spent most of my time trying to see what isn't there anymore; the people, their belongings, and the way of living there - strange, but a beautiful experience. Many of their belongings in the archeological museum, where I made this picture - Hadrian (if is was him) seems much more awake than his unknown visitor....

Comment by Ian Mason on May 29, 2013 at 1:51am

Thanks, Joan. I work in a nursing home and am used to the worst sides of aging but it's still a shock when it happens to those close to you, especially the dementia that's descended on my mother. It's also been a shock that the British system is so slow in doing anything re. diagnosis and treatment. Step-mum is physically weakened after 12 weeks in bed but is begining to move a bit again, so may well recover some of her mobility.

If the site in Turkey is the one I've also seen a documentary on, the decline in living standards coincides with the beginning of organised religion and a rigid class structure. 9,000 years later and we're still trying to remove those problems.

Having re-read my earlier post: the nature of your weapon is unrelated to my good wishes :-D

Comment by Joan Denoo on May 28, 2013 at 11:18pm

Ian, I think it is especially difficult in this era to walk with family members facing the end of their lives. When I was a little girl, both my grandmothers provided care, Grandma Denoo was a registered nurse and delivered many of the babies in our village. Grandma whitehead was a midwife, and so between the two of them, Tekoa had their help. They both helped care for the elderly or taught families how to provide care. We didn't have nursing homes in those day, even though we did have the Poor Farm where farm workers went to die. It was a smelly place and I will never forget the stench.  

I wasn't until about the time I was in high school that people started taking relatives to nursing homes. In fact, my two grandmothers were the first in my family to go to a nursing home.

The elderly lived at home, family and friends offered dinners and helped care for them. So, ageing was very normal, common, and was a part of living. 

I understand this little, wee bit of history, doesn't make your situation any easier. I just want to invite you to relax into the process, knowing there is nothing you can do to change what happens to your loved ones. 

And also, this support group offers great comfort. We are so fortunate! 

 

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