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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 852
Latest Activity: yesterday

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

Betty Explains Religious Freedom (Betty Bowers)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Randall Smith yesterday. 9 Replies

Well, considering all the RFRA bills popping up all over the United States, plus all the fun and games ISIS is bringing to the good folks in Syria and Iraq, Betty Bowers, the epitome of well-dressed christianity, has decided to clarify the true…Continue

Tags: persecution, ISIS, Religious Freedom, America's Best Christian, Betty Bowers

Surreal, I haz it

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner May 6. 82 Replies

Surreal, not just found in art.Continue

Tags: surreal

Let's not define ourselves or others by our worst behaviors

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Dominique Lutz Apr 16. 6 Replies

My take on the recent melt down at Hang With Friends, of which I missed part, is that some of us were tripped up by a habit of thought. It's something we learn growing up, and use without realizing how much pain it can generate -  failing to…Continue

Tags: dispute at Hang With Friends

The FLDS Cult Is Unraveling

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Idaho Spud Mar 29. 3 Replies

The FLDS Cult Is Unraveling"the internet is a lifeline for people trapped in the most restrictive and stifling forms of…Continue

Tags: Warren Jeff, internet, FLDS

Ode to Yahweh (Non Stamp Collector & 43alley)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Joan Denoo Mar 24. 1 Reply

Ages ago (five or six years, I guess it is) when I first started recognizing my own atheism, one of the first atheist YouTubers I ran onto was Non Stamp Collector.  His handiwork wasn't up to Disney's standards, nor even Hanna-Barbera, but his wit…Continue

Tags: Yahweh, YouTube, 43alley, Non Stamp Collector

Oregon Field Guide - Lamprey Decline

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Mar 15. 3 Replies

Oregon Field Guide - Lamprey Decline"Populations of Eel-like lamprey have suddenly plummeted since the year 2000 in the Columbia Basin, surprising…Continue

Comment Wall

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Comment by Grinning Cat on April 4, 2014 at 10:42pm

Joan, you truly went through challenges I can't imagine... I'm glad you broke the cycle, and you and your kids went on to create a good life!

Comment by Joan Denoo on April 4, 2014 at 8:43pm

By the way, we ran away from our home on base at Ft Hood, TX in 1974; my husband was a full colonel by then. Yes, officers beat their wives and children, too. Don't let anyone tell you it is only the lower income, uneducated, low social strata that experience family violence.

I made a very good living after I earned my master's degree, when I had a private practice and most of my clients were wives of ministers, doctors, lawyers, judges and business executives. I was called as an expert witness in several child custody cases. 

Comment by Joan Denoo on April 4, 2014 at 8:33pm

Carl, Oh, yes! I think so. As a very small child I was always trying to figure out how to escape the razor strap which my mother used with perfect skill, and I was often trying to untangle their terrible fights. I was an only child and after WWII we lived in a neighborhood with no other children my age. I loved going over to Mrs. Robinson’s home with my collie and visit her many dogs, cats, chickens, Guinea hens and parrot. That is where I spent most of my time until I graduated from high school. 

After I married, I had to learn how to walk on egg shells and became quite good at it. When the children were born, my daughter was six weeks old when she received the first beating,  then my son Craig, and then my son Cary. I taught them how to be quiet when their dad was home, we spoke in sign language. 

One day in 1974, when Laura was ten years old, she put her hands on her hips, looked her Dad in the eye, when she was only eye level with his brass buckle belt and told him he didn’t have the right to treat us that way. 

Click! What did she say? She said he didn’t have the right to treat us this way! How many other times had he treated us in a way that he didn’t have a right to do? I put my kids in the car, with our two cats and their litters and drove two thousand miles, bought us an old condemned house and we lived in a tent until we got all the mice out of the place. We then moved in and slept on the floor, and used our tent for cooking. We did laundry in a basement sink, and began to work as a team. 

We planted a huge garden, made arrangements with Mert Rosauer, our local grocer, to scavenge his back room each week for out of date milk and meat. I worked full time, went to school and when the kids were in high school I finally had a master’s degree and began to make a living wage. 

That started 40 years ago, July 1, 1974. Now, 2014, that old condemned house is a lovely home with a beautiful garden where we hold weddings, funeral memorials, baby christenings, birthday celebrations and welcome in each new season with a festival. 

I lived with abundant resources and I lived with none. I know the struggles of families trying to survive with so many barriers to making a living wage. I spent my working years with people in trouble, whether it was at a boys’ ranch, at Community Colleges where I taught life skills for displaced homemakers, at battered women’s shelters, or at the prison where I taught men anger management and other skills they needed to survive in today’s world. 

I had to not only divorce my whole family, because we were generations of family violence victims, both men and women. I married a man with a similar heritage. To break out of the system, I had to break with family, religion, and community. 

Now, am I not one lucky woman!? I broke the cycle that goes back more generations than I have been able to find. I have gone back 15 generations on one grandparent … all with family violence. 

I am profoundly happy. I have met some rough challenges and I have been up to the task on every single one. Cancer was the most recent and I have been diagnosed with no cancer cells in my body. I had a chemo drip this afternoon and in three weeks I have my last. Life is too precious to be mad, sad, afraid, or guilty. 

Comment by Joan Denoo on April 4, 2014 at 7:53pm

Loren, Priceless! I'm reposting. 

Comment by Joan Denoo on April 4, 2014 at 7:28pm

I look for and read things that seem important to know and to develop my position on the topic at hand. I, too, don't look for the funny and don't see it until someones points it out.  Spud, you and I could be related. And I enjoyed the flies around stuff comment of sk8eycat
Compounding that fact, I am getting more concerned about religion and what it does to thinking. Knowing even sophisticated scientists fall for that religious claptrap, makes me shudder! 

Looking on the bright side, we have Dawkins, Krauss, Dennett, and 

Dale McGowan

Ayaan Hirsi Ali

Richard Carrier 

Hemant Mehta 

Michael Newdow 

James Randi

Julian Assange 

David Suzuki

Peter Boghossian

Richard Leakey

Sean Faircloth,  

Ricky Gervais

Seth MacFarlane

Quite a nice assortment of people to read, from whom to gain ideas. 

Comment by Loren Miller on April 4, 2014 at 6:41pm

Comment by Idaho Spud on April 4, 2014 at 4:38pm

Example: "Lots of flies around that stuff." makes me smile, although I would almost never think of it myself.

Comment by Idaho Spud on April 4, 2014 at 4:35pm

Yes, Joan, I am becoming less serious as time goes on, but I still see the serious side of things a great deal, and I very seldom see humor in most things until they are pointed-out to me.

Once something humorous is pointed-out, I do appreciate a fair amount of it, and smile at it, but not as much as a lot of people it seems.

Stupidity is almost never humorous to me, although I do quite often appreciate jokes about it here on A/N.

People hurting or embarrassing other people are almost never humorous to me, even if the butt of the joke is an ass.

Crudeness and vulgarity are usually not humorous either, although there are exceptions.

Comment by sk8eycat on April 4, 2014 at 4:27pm

Back in the 1980s, Harlan Ellison referred to the family Joan mentioned below as "Shitfly in his column in the Los Angeles Free Press. 

Gross, bit it fits.  (and it's another reason I refer to a certain collection of myths and fables as the buybull.  Lotsa flies around that stuff.)

Comment by Joan Denoo on April 4, 2014 at 1:44pm

If you need a reason to take atheism to the general public, just glance through Andrew Schlafly. It raises all kinds of concerns in me and there are those who believe him. He worked as a device physicist for Intel, an electrical engineer at the applied physics laboratory of Johns Hopkins University, and Bell Labs.

Schlafly also became a member of the New York State Bar, served as an adjunct professor of administrative law at Seton Hall Law School and worked as an attorney at a New York City law firm. Currently, he is General Counsel for the Association of American Physicians and Surgeons

He spreads his virus all through the educated community, even among engineers, lawyers, physicians and surgeons. 

His famous mother, Phyllis Schlafly, raised an interesting fellow, indeed.  

A Young Earth Creationist, his beliefs spew out of him like a fog of delusions infecting others near and far. 

His beliefs include distain of books, disrespect for academic qualifications, politicization of curriculum, unusual beliefs about hygiene, conflicting view about the bible, he a began Bible Retranslation Project and The Conservative Bible Project to correct errors in the bible that were not conservative enough, and he created an online encyclopedia, Conservapedia spouting conservative values.  

Andrew Schlafly is only one reason he and those who teach, preach, and legislate with these values perform like a virus, infecting those who see, hear, and read his beliefs. 

A virus spreads much faster and infects more exposed people than ancestry. A virus infects here and now, even as coughing and sneezing spread virus faster than infection through the skin. 

His ideas do not lead to flourishing ... for individuals, families, communities, nations and the Earth. 

"Tim Brooks of Public Health England told The Guardian that the Black Death was a pneumonic version of the disease—an airborne infection of the lungs, spread via coughing and sneezing—instead of bubonic—an infection that enters through the skin, infects the lymph system and is spread by rat fleas."

Bones Tell Black Death Story

 

 

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