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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 848
Latest Activity: 51 minutes ago

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

Seth Andrews - The Copycats: How Christianity Steals The Best Ideas

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Soren Sagan on Wednesday. 9 Replies

Many of us have observed or learned how christianity shamelessly borrows from other sources to bolster its position and show off its supposed wonderfulness.  Well, Seth Andrews of The Thinking Atheist podcast has compiled some of the more modern-day…Continue

Tags: steal, borrow, copycat, The Thinking Atheist, Seth Andrews

Finding Your Roots

Started by Randall Smith. Last reply by Chris G Dec 15. 9 Replies

I've been into genealogy for a long time. It's fun, especially with internet help, but increasingly frustrating. You see, I've hit "brick walls". And being a Smith doesn't make research any easier.Wouldn't you think I could find the death date and…Continue

Christmas: Behind the Curtain (The Thinking Atheist)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by sk8eycat Dec 12. 11 Replies

Well, it's that time of year again.  Time to gird our loins, put on our battle armor and join the (dah-dah DAAAAAH!) WAR AGAINST CHRISTMAS!!! [groan!] Yeah, most of us have heard that crap before, probably too many times, in fact, how atheists are…Continue

Tags: Christmas, The Thinking Atheist, Seth Andrews

Secular and Reclaimed Winter Holiday Songs

Started by Grinning Cat. Last reply by sk8eycat Nov 26. 41 Replies

This is an appropriate day of the year for this subject...What are some of your favorite winter holiday songs?It would be especially good to share powerful new secular lyrics to tunes that have become associated with Christmas.…Continue

Tags: singing, lyrics, reclaimed, reclaiming, HumanLight

Aljam

Started by Randall Smith. Last reply by Grinning Cat Nov 24. 4 Replies

I'm not a news hound by any stretch, but I do like to stay informed about what's going on in the world. (I despise "local" news with all the reports of murders, robberies, fires, etc.)The national "evening" news shows really irritate me. I hate…Continue

Surreal, I haz it

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Nov 22. 79 Replies

Surreal, not just found in art.Continue

Tags: surreal

Comment Wall

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Comment by Ruth Anthony-Gardner on July 30, 2014 at 5:29pm

Thanks for the update, Brent. I'm glad you found at least a partial solution.

I hope your new pet at least partly helps with your grief, booklover and Randall.

Great LOL, booklover, and political quote too. Did you create that, or what? No author was credited.

Comment by booklover on July 30, 2014 at 3:43pm
Thank you Brent, Patricia, and Carl. Beautiful candle Patricia. :)
Brent, glad to hear things are going better for you, and you are making some money. I know a woman who gets paid for doing respite care for her son who lives with her. He is severely Autistic. Yes! You should post more often! Good to hear from you!
Comment by Joan Denoo on July 30, 2014 at 3:43pm

Brent Feeney, thank you for bringing us up to date your your situation and challenges you face. It is never easy for a son to take care of a mother. My son, Cary, took care of me the year I was in cancer treatment and he did a wonderful job. My other two children were relieved  because he did a fine job and was trustworthy. 

Sorry your Walmart experience turned out the way it did. Frankly, I am glad you are not working for them anymore ... I boycott them because of their labor policies. 

It seems 2013 was a big transition year for you with your father's passing and mother's stroke and then heart problems. Taking on the responsibility of caring for her is a big job. There are many strategies that can make it easier and I am glad you had some training.

I cared for my dad after he broke his hip and began to fail. He lived with me the last seven years of his life. A home nursing organization came in and gave me instructions as his needs changed, and I had help from visiting nurses for his baths.

That is a good idea to get financial help while caring for her. It just makes sense that public funds be used in such a way, so that you can receive assistance with expenses when you can't work and care for her.

I tried to work and care for dad, but gave that up after about a year. I was teaching classes at the time and he would call needing help, and his needs became more intense. At the end I was doing body lifts and he was too heavy for me. We both realized I could no longer do all the tasks and instead of going back into a nursing home, he chose to die. He was 86, he couldn't hear, his sight was failing, and nothing tasted good. He had no control over anything and was not a happy elder. He chose wisely. 

Your experiences will undoubtedly be different than mine, and we are here to listen when you need to vent, and perhaps we can offer some suggestions that will help. 

In the process, I hear your challenge and respect you for the efforts you make on your mother's behalf. Stay in touch. I look forward to walking this walk with you. 

Comment by The Flying Atheist on July 30, 2014 at 3:25pm

Mindy, I'm so sorry to hear your sad news.  I know you've mentioned recently that this day would be coming, but that doesn't make it any easier.  At least you know that Molly had a wonderful life as part of your household.

(and Patricia, that's a beautiful candle posting!)

Brent, it's always good hearing from you.  What great news that you're actually getting paid to care for your mother!  I had no idea that such a program existed. 

Comment by Brent Feeney on July 30, 2014 at 2:51pm

While I'm here *LOL*, wanted to give everyone an update on what's been going on with my mom.

As you may or may not know, I left a job I had at an area Walmart the first part of February after being told to take a transfer from stocking groceries to maintenance or be fired. Took the transfer, found I couldn't do it and turned in my resignation.

As some of you may also remember, I have been having a fairly rough year and a half; my dad died of Parkinson's complications in January 2013 and my mom had a stroke in October 2013. The damage was minimized fortunately but it has affected her some.

Not long after that, mom had to go into the hospital with a case of congestive heart failure. The good news is that she was able to get better and was released from the hospital a couple of days after she went in.

Right at the end of the Winter Olympics, my sister asked me if I wanted to come over and help take care of her so she and my other sister could both go back to work. I accepted and spend the week over with mom, my sisters and a nephew and niece over on the Illinois side of St. Louis, returning to my place in St. Louis city on the weekends. For the most part, it's worked out pretty well.

I brought up the idea of trying to get into a program where I could be paid to help take care of mom, and not long after, they had an interview with an state agency office, who then referred me to another company called Help at Home, a Chicago-based company with an office in Wood River, IL, not far from where mom lives in Glen Carbon (between Collinsville and Edwardsville, for those familiar with STL-area geography).

Submitted an application, passed all the checks, took three days of required training and now I'm being paid (at least part-time; she was approved for 17.5 hours/week) to help take care of mom. It's been a big help, no doubt, but I'd still help out even if I wasn't getting paid. At least being paid helps get the bills at home paid.

I do basic stuff for her; cook breakfast, get her lunch, clean out floors, make sure she gets her meds, help her out, generally make sure she has what she needs. It's pretty difficult at times but rewarding as well.

I hope everyone's doing well too. I should contribute more often to this group, I'll admit.

Comment by Brent Feeney on July 30, 2014 at 2:42pm

Mindy and Randy, sending you all good thoughts and wishes on the loss of your dogs. I'm a dog lover myself (though i do have plenty of room in my heart for cats too) and I hate to hear what's happened to your dogs.

Comment by booklover on July 30, 2014 at 8:44am

I heard on t.v. Joan that he punched her in the face, and it was caught on camera.  That is what caused her unconciousness.

Comment by Joan Denoo on July 30, 2014 at 8:40am

Randy, your wrote, "The Ray Rice case is a good example."

I had to look up his name to figure out what you meant. 

February 15, 2014, domestic violence arrest, with an unconscious woman with Ray Rice coming out of an elevator. The article didn't say what caused the unconscious state, but by deduction from he arrest, I assume it was a domestic violence incident. 

March 28, 2014, marriage of Ray Rice and his girlfriend!  

Alarm bells, sirens ringing, whistles blowing. This is not the end of any domestic violence, it is merely the first of many incidents until the girlfriend/wife wakes up from her denial and delusions and realizes she is being treated as an object, a thing, a non-person. I do hope she and Rice get some powerful counseling ... not the mamby pamby kind of feel good therapy, but the deeply rooted exploration of the thinking minds of each one. 

Comment by booklover on July 30, 2014 at 8:13am

Thanks Spud and Chris!  Randy, that's wonderful you're going to the humane society today.  We can mourn the loss of our Mollys together.  I will go to the humane society too.  Not today, but soon, and I will save a cat instead of a dog.

Comment by Randall Smith on July 30, 2014 at 7:22am

Thank you all from the bottom of my heart for your notes of sympathy. Your words bring tears to my eyes. I am going to the humane society today to see what they have. 

 

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