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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 852
Latest Activity: 2 hours ago

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

Seeing Things (TheraminTrees)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Feb 25. 2 Replies

TheraminTrees doesn't release videos very often these days,  but when he does, they are positive GEMS.  Most recent of his works is the following, wherein he dismantles some of the common rebuttals atheist get from believers when we assert our…Continue

Tags: seeing things, YouTube, TheraminTrees

Let's not define ourselves or others by our worst behaviors

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Feb 15. 4 Replies

My take on the recent melt down at Hang With Friends, of which I missed part, is that some of us were tripped up by a habit of thought. It's something we learn growing up, and use without realizing how much pain it can generate -  failing to…Continue

Tags: dispute at Hang With Friends

You'll NEVER Guess Who Just Showed Up on Mr. Deity!!!

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Loren Miller Feb 14. 11 Replies

I don't believe this one either, but ... well, here it is: And would you believe - Mr. D made me laugh!  RD, that is!Continue

Tags: Richard Dawkins, Mr. Deity

Seth Andrews' Rebuttal to "10 Women Christian Men Shouldn't Marry" (The Thinking Atheist)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Loren Miller Feb 6. 20 Replies

It seems as though some numb-nuts New York pastor by the name of Stephen Kim has written two marriage advice pieces for christian men and women.  Not surprisingly, his suggestions come straight out of his never-fail magic book.  Seth Andrews of The…Continue

Tags: advice, marriage, The Thinking Atheist, Seth Andrews, Stephen Kim

Seth Andrews' New Book, "Sacred Cows" (The Thinking Atheist)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Patricia Feb 6. 7 Replies

For the last few podcasts, Seth Andrews has been alluding to a new literary effort he's been working on.  Well, the cat is out of the bag ... or perhaps I should say, the cow is out of the barn!  Seth's new opus is entitled: Sacred Cows: a…Continue

Tags: book, Sacred Cows, The Thinking Atheist, Seth Andrews

Living in the Answers

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Patricia Jan 18. 13 Replies

I am weary of those who declare they understand all the answers to the creation of the universe and Earth. They claim they know the answers to the questions of life, meaning, death, and the afterlife. Those with all the answer speak with confidence,…Continue

Tags: confidence, education, government, family, afterlife

Comment Wall

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Comment by Randall Smith on July 31, 2014 at 7:29am

It's so nice not to have to hear someone say "doggy heaven", etc. I did check out the dogs at the animal shelter (remember when we used to call it the "dog pound"?). I think I found one I like. More later.

Joan, isn't "googling" something great?! (Ray Rice)

Brent, thanks. It was nice to read you're doing well after a rough year. Keep you spirits up.

Comment by Joan Denoo on July 31, 2014 at 1:59am

Mindy, I just read that your Molly died and I am so sorry that she had that terrible experience at the end. From your photos of her over the past months have shown a very much loved, well cared for, treasured part of the family. I am sorry for your loss. 

Comment by Plinius on July 31, 2014 at 12:39am

Thanks for your story, Brent! I'm glad you can share the burden with your sisters, but even so it's a hard job.

Comment by Brent Feeney on July 30, 2014 at 8:54pm

Joan, I have a few stories from my brief Wally World experience I could share. Found out after I'd been hired at that particular Walmart that it had been evacuated about a year and a half before I hired on because someone was caught cooking meth in a soda bottle in her purse while she was in the store - a couple of weeks AFTER she had been arrested for the same thing at a gas station!

Comment by Brent Feeney on July 30, 2014 at 8:51pm

Thanks for the kind words everyone. It means a lot to me. I'm glad things worked out so I could get paid for doing this, even if it's part-time. Started out at $10.05/hr, with a raise coming in November, so it does help with the bills and puts a bit of money in my pocket to enjoy life.

I agree with the sentiments about your Molly, Mindy. I wish we were allowed to have that kind of choice on when we go if the time came too. I hope you're doing well too.

Comment by Ruth Anthony-Gardner on July 30, 2014 at 5:29pm

Thanks for the update, Brent. I'm glad you found at least a partial solution.

I hope your new pet at least partly helps with your grief, booklover and Randall.

Great LOL, booklover, and political quote too. Did you create that, or what? No author was credited.

Comment by Joan Denoo on July 30, 2014 at 3:43pm

Brent Feeney, thank you for bringing us up to date your your situation and challenges you face. It is never easy for a son to take care of a mother. My son, Cary, took care of me the year I was in cancer treatment and he did a wonderful job. My other two children were relieved  because he did a fine job and was trustworthy. 

Sorry your Walmart experience turned out the way it did. Frankly, I am glad you are not working for them anymore ... I boycott them because of their labor policies. 

It seems 2013 was a big transition year for you with your father's passing and mother's stroke and then heart problems. Taking on the responsibility of caring for her is a big job. There are many strategies that can make it easier and I am glad you had some training.

I cared for my dad after he broke his hip and began to fail. He lived with me the last seven years of his life. A home nursing organization came in and gave me instructions as his needs changed, and I had help from visiting nurses for his baths.

That is a good idea to get financial help while caring for her. It just makes sense that public funds be used in such a way, so that you can receive assistance with expenses when you can't work and care for her.

I tried to work and care for dad, but gave that up after about a year. I was teaching classes at the time and he would call needing help, and his needs became more intense. At the end I was doing body lifts and he was too heavy for me. We both realized I could no longer do all the tasks and instead of going back into a nursing home, he chose to die. He was 86, he couldn't hear, his sight was failing, and nothing tasted good. He had no control over anything and was not a happy elder. He chose wisely. 

Your experiences will undoubtedly be different than mine, and we are here to listen when you need to vent, and perhaps we can offer some suggestions that will help. 

In the process, I hear your challenge and respect you for the efforts you make on your mother's behalf. Stay in touch. I look forward to walking this walk with you. 

Comment by The Flying Atheist on July 30, 2014 at 3:25pm

Mindy, I'm so sorry to hear your sad news.  I know you've mentioned recently that this day would be coming, but that doesn't make it any easier.  At least you know that Molly had a wonderful life as part of your household.

(and Patricia, that's a beautiful candle posting!)

Brent, it's always good hearing from you.  What great news that you're actually getting paid to care for your mother!  I had no idea that such a program existed. 

Comment by Brent Feeney on July 30, 2014 at 2:51pm

While I'm here *LOL*, wanted to give everyone an update on what's been going on with my mom.

As you may or may not know, I left a job I had at an area Walmart the first part of February after being told to take a transfer from stocking groceries to maintenance or be fired. Took the transfer, found I couldn't do it and turned in my resignation.

As some of you may also remember, I have been having a fairly rough year and a half; my dad died of Parkinson's complications in January 2013 and my mom had a stroke in October 2013. The damage was minimized fortunately but it has affected her some.

Not long after that, mom had to go into the hospital with a case of congestive heart failure. The good news is that she was able to get better and was released from the hospital a couple of days after she went in.

Right at the end of the Winter Olympics, my sister asked me if I wanted to come over and help take care of her so she and my other sister could both go back to work. I accepted and spend the week over with mom, my sisters and a nephew and niece over on the Illinois side of St. Louis, returning to my place in St. Louis city on the weekends. For the most part, it's worked out pretty well.

I brought up the idea of trying to get into a program where I could be paid to help take care of mom, and not long after, they had an interview with an state agency office, who then referred me to another company called Help at Home, a Chicago-based company with an office in Wood River, IL, not far from where mom lives in Glen Carbon (between Collinsville and Edwardsville, for those familiar with STL-area geography).

Submitted an application, passed all the checks, took three days of required training and now I'm being paid (at least part-time; she was approved for 17.5 hours/week) to help take care of mom. It's been a big help, no doubt, but I'd still help out even if I wasn't getting paid. At least being paid helps get the bills at home paid.

I do basic stuff for her; cook breakfast, get her lunch, clean out floors, make sure she gets her meds, help her out, generally make sure she has what she needs. It's pretty difficult at times but rewarding as well.

I hope everyone's doing well too. I should contribute more often to this group, I'll admit.

Comment by Brent Feeney on July 30, 2014 at 2:42pm

Mindy and Randy, sending you all good thoughts and wishes on the loss of your dogs. I'm a dog lover myself (though i do have plenty of room in my heart for cats too) and I hate to hear what's happened to your dogs.

 

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