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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
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Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

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Discussion Forum

Are you battling cancer or a cancer survivor?

Started by Worrall Travel Rs - Roz and Russ. Last reply by Worrall Travel Rs - Roz and Russ 15 minutes ago. 14 Replies

Happily, I am now a five year breast cancer survivor, and I am thankful to my friends, family, my health care team, and to science and medical discoveries. Dealing with cancer and treatment is never easy and it's damned scary, but it is easier when…Continue

what boobs are good for

Started by dr kellie. Last reply by Bertold Brautigan 22 hours ago. 77 Replies

I discovered a brilliant new way to avoid  having xians ring my doorbell in attempt to share the good news with me.  Just now, I was in my kitchen, washing dishes and finding something to eat, when I looked out the large window above my sink.  Two…Continue

Surreal, I haz it

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Aug 6. 76 Replies

Surreal, not just found in art.Continue

Tags: surreal

Eat vegetables, Be happy

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Plinius Aug 1. 9 Replies

An association between the amount of fruit and vegetables people ate and their happiness? Yes indeed. People who ate 7 portions of fruits and/or vegetables a day were the happiest.…Continue

Tags: vegetables, fruit, diet, happiness

Optical Illusions

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Idaho Spud Jul 30. 59 Replies

This one seems a bit creepy, like the middle one shouldn't be able to change rotation like that. from Cheezburger.comContinue

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Comment by Joan Denoo on March 19, 2014 at 10:29pm

Mindy, I can understand your desire to keep the house in the family. My family has been like that. We keep places for generations. It is sweet to go back walk through the rooms of one's childhood. To live in a home in which one grew up would have a certain sense of continuity to it. It is one option. 

Comment by Joan Denoo on March 19, 2014 at 10:27pm

Felaine, several of my friends very happily left their homes to move into seniors-only apartment buildings. They are difficult to get into, and one has to plan a couple years ahead. None of them regretted their decision to sell and move. Also, living in earthquake territory, as you so, I would surely not want to live any higher than ground floor. 

My cousin and his wife were in Northridge and in the dark of night their stairwell fell and when they scrambled, they fell through the hole in the floor. He is a big, husky, farm-raised man and he described his terror as he was falling after being shaken out of bed. 

Comment by booklover on March 19, 2014 at 10:04pm
I would like to leave this house to our kids, since it's the only place they've ever lived (except when our daughter was away at college), but I don't know if that is something they would want. We will have to discuss it with them!
Comment by sk8eycat on March 19, 2014 at 9:06pm

I'm looking for a seniors-only apartment building where they base the rent on your (measly) income.  Most of them around here are full, with waiting lists. 

PLUS, if/when I have to leave this house, I don't EVER want to be close enough to drive by and see what the new owners do to the property.  Like build a Big Box house, and rip out all the trees.  That does seem to have slowed down around here because the McMansions that were built on spec in the past 5 years aren't selling.  Or they do sell, but not for "enough."

Comment by Joan Denoo on March 19, 2014 at 1:19pm

Carl, may I caution you about owning your own place. First of all, I very desperately wanted my own home, and it was a wise decisions because I bought on a down cycle and paid only $12,000 for it. There are no such buys any more. The housing market took off into a Boom and then a Bust that created disasters for many thoughtful families. 

We are at the end of this Bust period and a new bubble is already forming in the housing market. Be really careful that you do not get caught in an overpriced piece of property. You lose all liquidity when you own property. It is difficult to sell, and you can't eat it when another crash occurs. 

Remember that capitalism is based on Boom and Bust reasoning. That  is why the old bromide, "buy low, sell high" applies to anything one does. 

The old man of the late 1800s early 1900s predicted capitalism will have a Boom and Bust cycle every 60 years. Well, he was off on his timing, but correct on his predictions. It is easy to track Booms and Busts, just Google it, and you will find all kinds of information to help you see what part of the cycle we are in. 

Nikolai Kondratiev was shot by firing squad on the orders of Stalin in 1938 because he predicted the fall of communism. He also predicted the fall of socialism and capitalism.

Kondratieff predicted that under capitalism one generation will survive, with great suffering, through the Bust cycle, and the next generation will be told the stories, the next generation after that may hear the stories and say it will never happen again. It is that generation that lives in the Boom part of the cycle and makes political and economic decisions that lead to another Bust. 

Financial crisis of 2007–08

Kondratieff Waves and the Greater Depression of 2013 - 2020

Kondratieff has been replaced by a whipper snapper, R.N. Elliott and popularized by Robert Prechter. This theory asserts that crowd behavior ebbs and flows in clear trends. Based on this ebb and flow, Elliott identified a certain structure to price movements in the financial markets. The article serves as a basic introduction to Elliott Wave Theory.

Elliott Wave Basics

From what I have been reading a new bubble is already forming in the real estate market. Who knows how high it will rise or how low it will fall. I just caution you to think twice about owning your own place. 

For me, it means replacing my furnace at $5,000. My roof also needs replacing. I have lived here for 40 years on July 1, and many of the things I did to improved it all those years ago need to be replaced. 

Whatever you do, it is a crap shoot. I just want you to be aware of the risks and weigh them against the benefits and your ability to live up to the commitment you sign when you purchase your own place.

My best wishes go with you.  

Comment by Joan Denoo on March 19, 2014 at 12:19pm

Carl, I am so happy to learn of your concern for your expected little boy into the family. In my experience, and you didn't ask, but you know me, I will have my say, whether wanted or not. 

Circumcision has become a cultural thing, far beyond religion. It is like so many things we do that have become part of what I call ABCTDs of life: Attitudes, Beliefs, Customs, Traditions, and Values. They become institutionalized in society completely forgetting it was a device to separate "us" from "them". It is not necessary and not recommended by enlightened doctors and professionals. 

Good for you for being concerned, and for having a library of films you can use as part of your reasoning. 

As usual, my approach is honesty, with concrete reasoning to support your decision. Some do not like my directness, but to be perfectly frank, I see no benefit in pussyfooting around important topics. 

I know you to be a gentle person, and will not overwhelm her with your power, but will use carefully thought out reasons for your point of view. You will do an outstanding job of walking with her through this very important time in her life.

 

Comment by booklover on March 19, 2014 at 10:26am

Thanks everyone.  Yes, my son has pain in his knees as well.  They are doing much more testing, so I'll let you know the results next week.

Learning to live frugally, but not miserly, has been a hobby of mine since I was a young mom.  I LOVED reading about how people do not need to have a huge income to have a nice life.  I know it depends on many different factors, including where you live.  I don't always do it, but I love having the knowledge.  It allowed me to stay home with my kids, and homeschool my son.  We never were in want of anything, and even went to NYC and Las Vegas, and paid cash.  Now I love to read about minimalist living.  I regularly take bags of things to Goodwill, and I don't even know how the stuff got into the house!  I don't like "stuff."  I only want to keep whats beautiful or meaningful to me, and stuff I use regularly.  It's very freeing.  Also, less cleaning!  One thing I collect though... CATS! ;)

Comment by Ruth Anthony-Gardner on March 19, 2014 at 9:50am

Ian is right

A little bit of pressure on a nerve can cause pain a long way away.

Pinched nerves in my spine make pain go all the way down my arm into my hand. Sometimes the lower extremity pain is the first  in a flare up. I get some control over the problem with daily neck stretching for 12 minutes.

My husband and I are debt free, too. We have a modest lifestyle so our social security and my pension meets our needs.

Comment by Plinius on March 19, 2014 at 2:45am

I'd love to say that, that I have very little debt, but it's not horrible either: half our apartment belongs to the bank.

How to open the discussion with your niece - quite a problem! "Live and let live", has the baby no rights? Perhaps you can start with info about the risks?

Comment by The Flying Atheist on March 19, 2014 at 2:16am

I have very little debt at the moment, and that should be cleared up pretty soon.  However, I'd like to purchase a condo sometime later this year.  If I end up going through with that plan, I'll be taking on a huge financial responsibility for years to come.  I just really want a place to call my own, and now seems to be a good time to make real estate purchases.  And my job appears to be much more stable for the first time in quite a few years, so I feel confident in making this commitment.  I shall see.    

On an unrelated note, it was recently announced in my family that my niece here in Chicago, who is in her mid-twenties, is pregnant and will be having a son.  I now have to figure out an acceptable, but non-creepy, non-pushy, and tactful way to broach the subject with her about not having the baby circumcised.  I don't like to push my unsolicited views on her about such a personal topic, but I have a very strong opinion regarding keeping babies intact.  I'm pretty much a "live and let live" type of person, but I'd like to make sure she is educated on the subject.  She doesn't appear to be overly religious and I don't believe she as attended church regularly for any significant portion of her life.  We've never had any conversations about religion, so I'm not 100% sure about her spiritual views.  I've saved some YouTube videos over the years that are related to the topic of circumcision, so I have those ready to go as part of my arsenal.  Beyond that, I'm at a loss for a strategy to get the conversation started.      

 

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