Oops! (bumps in life, we promise not to ridicule)

Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Ian Mason on June 2, 2011 at 1:48pm

I find it hard to live with mistakes as I have a problem with atypical OCD. All errors, especially social ones, get stored in long-term memory and insist om coming back, time after time. Things have improved since I stopped trying to drink the problem away.

It would be nice to be able to "own up" now and again to the small mistakes we all make without fear of ridicule. It's hard to do that at work, say, as my job is in a caring profession where most collegues are women and some (repeat SOME) look down on any sign of "weakness" in a man.

Anybody out there read Kathryn Schulz's book "Being Wrong"? It's really good.

Yes, I'm rambling. Or to put it politely, sharing a few random thoughts.

I like the bouncy "Welcome".

Permalink Reply by Donna Darko on June 2, 2011 at 3:22pm

Ruth, I love your gifs.  They're friendly and welcoming, for sure.  I make all my own bread because most of what you buy isn't whole grain enough.  Sorry, I don't have a picture of a recent slice.

Permalink Reply by Tara on June 2, 2011 at 5:01pm

Hahaha, as someone with celiacs who makes gluten-free bread, I've had quite a few loaves with that very same shape!

Permalink Reply by Paula T. on June 2, 2011 at 7:56pm

Mistakes, goofs, being 'called out' for them......that hits home for me.  I get a knot in my stomach every time I make a mistake in front of others.  I try to hide them.  Thanks to my dad's comments growing up, I always felt inadequate.

 

"Nice play, Ox.  Whatya'do for an encore?"

"Does your face hurt?"  No....."Cuz it's killing me!"

"You know how to get rid of 20 pounds of ugly fat??  Cut off your head!"

 

Remarks like this really stick with a kid.....even into adulthood.  I was all about respecting and supporting others when I raised my boys.  Thankfully, they have self esteem and weren't subjected to feeling inferior for making honest mistakes.  

 

Great GIFS, Ruth!  All I know about html and coding I learned (and quickly forgot) during a computer tech class I had to take for my Master's Degree.

 

I love making bread, but do it the lazy way....with a bread maker!

 

Now that I'm done with my Master's and job hunting, I'm cleaning the house top to bottom and getting back to crocheting, which I taught myself how to do 2 years ago :)

Permalink Reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner on June 3, 2011 at 12:01pm

Your description of your dad's reaction to mistakes reminds me of a boyfriend I had named Carl, who was otherwise a nice guy. I was in graduate school, living alone after divorce, and started feeling as if I was a klutz. I was suffering from a feeling of inferiority, and introspected. This feeling was recent. I used to be very confident physically. Where did this come from? Then I realized it was a result of Carl's habit of making fun of my motor skills every time I fumbled with a key or something. The thing was, I'd never realized consciously what was going on. He'd been changing how I felt about myself without me noticing. So I explained this to him and told him to stop doing that. He did. All was well. Have you ever had a hear to heart with your dad about his behavior and how it effects you?

Permalink Reply by Paula T. on June 4, 2011 at 10:41am

No, I've never felt confident talking to my dad. I have the feeling that he doesn't realize how his comments affected me and being in his 70s, he is set in his ways. I think his comments were a form of bullying, like he was trying to feel superior. Growing up, somehow, I got the idea that he was right and I was wrong.....if our opinions didn't match. That kept me from sharing my opinions before too long. I still struggle with being confident in sharing my opinions, but I'm getting better.

Permalink Reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner on June 4, 2011 at 11:32am

Point well taken. At some point parents are too old to bring up issues. We just have to deal with their psychological legacies on our own.

Permalink Reply by Paula T. on June 4, 2011 at 12:43pm

I'm trying to work through all that now.  The consolation for me is that I broke the cycle and didn't treat my sons that way.  Unfortunately, my dad's actions adversely affected my brother's kids, since my parents were their guardians while they were growing up.

Permalink Reply by Ian Mason on June 3, 2011 at 12:41pm

Reminds me of my Mum's comments on my appearance: "You look like a bag of shit tied up ugly" was the most common. How are small boys supposed to keep their shirts tucked in their trousers? We move around!

Permalink Reply by Paula T. on June 4, 2011 at 10:45am

I can remember trying to keep my sons' dress shirts tucked in their pants! They attended parochial school, but thankfully, I was able to learn not to obsess over it and let them be boys, most of the time lol :)

Permalink Reply by Alice on June 3, 2011 at 2:06am

LOL... you live and learn - I suppose as long as it's cooked OK you can still butter it and eat it! I did the home made bread making for a while - but the machine wasn't cooking it enough - and I had too much on my plate so to speak with small kids to organise myself to do it all from scratch.

Low carb bread? What's that? I got off wheat for a while - and we made lots of almond cakes - really simple - you can almost add the ingredients in any amount - banana, eggs, crushed almonds, fresh dates, vanilla / cardimon / coco, rapidura / honey - and what ever other combination you can think of.... give me some tips if you can think of others...

Permalink Reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner on June 3, 2011 at 11:51am

Maybe we should start a separate bread making discussion. Anyway, I need bread that's much lower in carbs than what's sold as so called low carb bread. There used to be a Keto bread mix, but the company went out of business. I use  3 cups gluten flour, 3/4 cup soy flour, and 1/4 c either flax meal or hemp protein. The last ingredient has fiber, otherwise it comes out like rubber. The ingredients are expensive compared to regular flours.

 

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