LGBTQI atheists, nontheists, and friends

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LGBTQI atheists, nontheists, and friends

Nontheist lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and intersex people & friends.

Location: International
Members: 608
Latest Activity: 7 hours ago

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Comment by A Former Member on May 12, 2012 at 7:34pm

Well said, TFA.

Comment by The Flying Atheist on May 12, 2012 at 7:27pm

P.S. Joan.  If I were to dress in drag, I'd much prefer Oxfords.  I don't do very well in heels. 

Comment by The Flying Atheist on May 12, 2012 at 7:21pm

Joan, please don't let us scare you away.  Dallas is one of our outstanding members......well, usually (lol).  Many of us have a tendency to remove our shoes, step off the curb and enjoy a short diversion through the gutter from time to time.  When in Rome......   You might even find a topic of mutual interest to discuss with your hip grandchildren and surprise them with your newly found knowledge.  You're always welcome here.  And personally, from me to you....thanks for being such a wonderful supporter and friend of the LGBTQ community.  The "coolness" of your background far exceeds your perceived prudishness.       

Comment by A Former Member on May 12, 2012 at 5:39pm

3.) Some adults who had the surgery as babies are unhappy about it, and feel they are the wrong gender. However, many non-intersexed/normal gendered kids grow up to be transsexual anyhow, so who could have known what the intersexed kids may eventually feel. It is not as though those feelings are unique to intersexed people.

 

Let me elaborate: Bob was an intersexed baby, and his parents chose to make him a boy. As an adult Bob feels he should have been a woman. But if Bob HAD NOT been intersexed, would he have grown up as a transsexual anyhow? We can never know for sure.

Comment by A Former Member on May 12, 2012 at 5:37pm

Diversity is not an error

 

SB, that could be an activist organizations tag line. At the very least a bumper sticker. I'm gonna steal that and suggest some people use that here and there. Great line.

 

Okay, here's my take on the intersexed thing.

 

1.) I can't identify, so let that be known.

 

2.) There is no instruction manual for life, so I believe many of the doctors and parents were doing what they thought correct.

 

3.) Some adults who had the surgery as babies are unhappy about it, and feel they are the wrong gender. However, many non-intersexed/normal gendered kids grow up to be transsexual anyhow, so who could have known what the intersexed kids may eventually feel. It is not as though those feelings are unique to intersexed people.

 

4.) We have no way of knowing how many intersexed babies were assigned a gender as infants and grew up perfectly happy with their gender identity. These people may not even know they were born intersexed themselves. So we can't assume that it always leads to an unhappy/dissatisfied adulthood.

 

5.) And lastly, hindsight is always 20/20. Some people complain about being assigned a gender, and that is their right, but if no decision had been made as a child, undoubtedly you'd still have a certain number of people who'd be unhappy with the gender ambiguity, claiming that they hated being gender ambiguous, and that they would have been much happier had their parents just chosen a gender for them as a baby and raised them as such, because it would have saved them a lot of trouble. Of course, they can't know that life would have been happier, but we tend to assume that "if only things had been different, then I wouldn't have these problems now." But that is difficult to prove.

Comment by Susan Stanko on May 12, 2012 at 5:09pm

No need to apologize for the long response.  I actually hadn't considered that someone wouldn't identify as either gender.  It is so unusual for me that I forget that people like the nerd exist.

Comment by Sentient Biped on May 12, 2012 at 4:54pm

Susan, me too.  Also, in many cases, there is no "right gender" - some people are truly intersex and choosing a gender imposes an identity on them, and surgical changes to the body, even if neither gender is right.  The expression "first, do no harm" comes to mind.  I also wish they would use language to say there are variations of nature, rather then errors of nature.  Diversity is not an error, and in fact a propensity toward diversity is the basis for evolution, even if a particular individual does not reproduce.  Sorry for the long response - I agree with you.

Comment by Susan Stanko on May 12, 2012 at 4:54pm

Now, I am going to associate that pic with you Joan.

Comment by Susan Stanko on May 12, 2012 at 4:35pm

I really wish they would wait until a kid self identifies with a gender before picking one for them.  I have heard stories were the parent guessed wrong.

Comment by Joan Denoo on May 12, 2012 at 3:45pm

Dr. Kellie, sexual chatter may be hot, but it just doesn't appeal to me. Therefore, I will stop imposing on this site and will stay with tame things like gardening. 

I have no interest in stopping others from having "hot" chatter, I just shall refrain. By the way, I don't want to lose contact with you, Kellie, and look forward to reading your contributions.

 

 

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