I’m feeling nostalgic and I was reminiscing some of my favorite moments and superstitions as an ex-Catholic. I remember how I was told that I have to go to confession first before accepting the Eucharist (communion). So when I was a kid, before Sunday, I have to remember all the sins that I did that week. Did I curse? Did I make my parents mad? Did I see some perverted shit on TV? These are some of the important questions that I have to ponder and yes, I made a list. Then, confession day will come and I have to tell this priest, and he will prescribe something like, “You’re forgiven, 3 Our Father, 2 Hail Mary’s and 3 Glory Be.” Then problem would arise because sometimes the time gap between confession and communion, I would commit a stupid sin again. So many times, I would just sit off the communion and never take it for I never felt truly “clean” to accept Christ. It went on for years until my adulthood, up to the point that I just do not take communion every mass. Thank you God for making me feel so fucking dirty.

Anyone wants to share anything?

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Replies to This Discussion

I had the same issue, and a great deal of guilt associated with it [not that the guilt stopped me :) ] Some of the good Catholic girls I dated were in the same boat which made things more than difficult. Very uncomfortable unless you're an exhibitionist.
My brother and I used to make stuff up for confession. We were 9 or 10 how bad could we have been? Of course, the next week we actually had something to confess.
Father forgive me for I have sinned it is 46 years since my last confession. In that time I have some times thought about nuns and had lustful thoughts.

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