This question was asked before by another member of Atheist Nexus who, unfortunately, left the site about 6 months ago. When he left, his discussions went with him. (I hate that about Ning.) That is too bad, really, because that topic received more responses than any other discussion thread on A|N that I have ever seen -- well over 400, I believe.

Well, I don't plan on leaving A|N anytime soon, so I'm going to ask that question all over again. We've had a lot of new members since the first time, so this will be a good chance for all the new faces, and some of the old, to vent once again about why they are single.

So, why are you single?

Tags: atheist singles, companionship, dating, lovers, partners, romance, single, singles

Views: 2287

Replies to This Discussion

So, why are you single?

Because every woman I have ever had the slightest attraction for is either taken or gay.

I'm single because after I broke up with my ex a few months ago, I lost my job and it took me a little while to get myself together. I still don't have a job yet, and since I'm looking for one and I'm also in school now, I don't go partying like I used to. I also don't want another party girl with some serious drug abuse issues.
I'm alone on account of the simple rules of mathematics; the unfortunate combination of all my OCD's/phobias/eccentricities, impoverished financial situation, preponderance for extreme metal music and subsequent intolerance to little else and my particular likes/dislikes, makes the odds of me ever finding a compatible female match virtually impossible.
Need I say that I tend to be pessimistic? I'm permanently disabled, subsisting on SSI as my only source of income so world spanning getaways, five stared dinning experiences, etc are never going to be the case. I'm a germ-a-phobe but live in a very cluttered and disarrayed house, can't stand being around kids, love animals but can never actually have one on account of my allergies. I'm a militant anti-theist, not fond at all of the government or capitalism in general for that matter. Being a recovered alcoholic I can't deal with the drinking/druggie crowd. I have asthma so smoking is out. Tend to be introverted and of a suspicious nature. That's not to say I have no friends or social life at all, it's just limited. I'm a huge Sci-Fi, computer, science nut so that makes me a geek I suppose. My appearance seems to intimidate most, being all in black 99.9% of the time, with long hair & beard, thinking that I'm some sort of major hard-assed biker or something. Couldn't be more untrue. And to answer the typical response; my own self image and contentment would change negatively if I was otherwise. While on the subject of self image, I am rather obsessed with the effort to not fit the stereotypical overweight American image so prevalent today. I avoid fast/junk food and other high calorie garbage like the plague. With that in mind I really do abhor the "Mickie Dee's" look that's so typical here in the States. I would go so far as to say I have a fetish about skinniness in women I'm attracted to. I also much prefer to be able to have at least semi-intellectual conversations, so the typical TV watching, conformist drone doesn't appeal to me in the least.
So, to sum up, the odds of me finding an attractive, skinny, middle aged, childless, non-drinking/drug using, non pet owner, metalhead woman that could tolerate all my eccentricities without losing her mind, having a healthy sexual monogamous attitude, is about the same as the chances of winning the power-ball lottery three times in a row I would think. Am I wrong? Am I being too pessimistic or just being realistic?
Ken, I'd say your estimation of the odds is off because finding a partner is not an entirely random process, like the lotto. There are web sites that would allow you to simply check off the things you don't like. This would exclude many, but by no means all potential partners. I'm not saying they grow on trees, but the kind of woman you're looking for surely exists in sufficient numbers to make the search feasible.
Sooooo your saying that there is no search on the internet for the powerball numbers? Damn.
I haven't really looked. School,work,MMA training takes up ALL my time. Its not like i haven't been approached :-)
Jason: Thank you for saying so but with the odds so against it really does come down to a matter of ratio. People that are compatible and those who are not. I have tried dating sites with those options to narrow down the selections but they were constantly returning results that were obviously unfiltered. Granted this was years ago so perhaps the method has much improved. It still depends on a very small amount of compatible people. Being financially restricted to a small geographical area in which I could feasibly work with narrows it even more and I think the odds of a very wealthy woman in Europe or somewhere on the other side of the planet finding me irresistible and willing to finance the whole endeavor are astronomical.
I'm not necessarily complaining or trying to garner sympathy. I'm just answering the original question as honestly as I can.
I'm single because my ex-wife has borderline personality disorder and my last gf is a compulsive hoarder. Are there any garden variety neurotics out there?
We get to vent here!? The reason that I am single is because my girlfriend wanted to get married and me follow her around the world while she does her military duties. I'm just not a puppy-dog with nothing else to do. I have dreams of my own, and it didn't line up with what she wanted, so the relationship fell apart. She used my atheism as another excuse to break up. Guess she needed a better reason. So here I am picking up the pieces and moving on. Good luck all!
Heh, a license to vent is one interpretation for the thread subject line, yes. Most take it as a call to self-analysis, but the alternate angle could make the activity pick back up.
The reason that I am single is because my girlfriend wanted to get married and me follow her around the world while she does her military duties. I'm just not a puppy-dog with nothing else to do.

Hmmm, I suppose that's yet another issue for me. I sort of am leading a gypsy, move-where-work-and-the-wind-take-me life. So that further narrows my options to "Single Male Atheist, roughly my age group, non-smoking, politically/morally/personally compatible, who also happens to be a wandering gypsy and happens to be wandering the same general areas that I am."

What's the term again? Needle-in-a-haystack?

But the needles are out there in this big haystack world. Just be patient and persevere. Until then focus on why you like being single. There is a man out there looking for you.


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