The World’s Largest Coalition of Nontheists and Nontheist Communities!

I forgot how to date and how to flirt

I need help. Advice. Are there rules? What do I do? I haven't dated in about 4 years just because I didn't care and was focused on other things. Now I really want to date, but I forgot how!! I joined a couple of dating sites. One which I hate, and one that might be okay. . . Either way I am not a computer person and want to meet people in the real world, even if it all fails miserably! I just want to approach guys and tell them that they are taking me out. But I know this is too forward. But I am not the kind of girl to let my breasts hang out and act stupid either.. I try to make eye contact and smile- that's all I've got............

0 members like this

Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Eric on January 17, 2010 at 8:27pm

BTW, you should know that flirting only means making the other person feel good about themselves. That's the whole goal of flirting. Flirting itself doesn't actually have anything to do with dating per se. There are books on flirting on Amazon that don't have anything to say about dating at all. You can probably find flirting guidelines all over the Internet too.

Permalink Reply by Anna on January 17, 2010 at 11:03pm

Thought I would give anyone an update who is interested. . . I still hate eharmony. . . I have gone out with 2 different guys I have met on plentyoffish. One has potential the other one was very nice, but not for me. I have a date scheduled for this week with a third guy. I like him on paper the best. I am pretty nervous. I have never dated more than one guy at a time- I feel like a cheater, although in my rational mind I know I'm not doing anything wrong. So far it has been weird and awkward but not miserable.........

Permalink Reply by Double Standards??? on January 18, 2010 at 8:45am

I have never dated more than one guy at a time- I feel like a cheater...

I thought I was the only person who felt that way. I'm glad to hear somebody has had some success with plentyoffish. I think plentyoffish and okstupid/okcupid both suck.

Permalink Reply by Anna on January 19, 2010 at 8:14am

Yes I feel like a scandalous cheater- - - I am excited about my date this weekend BUT I want to tell the other guy that I am going on a date, so at least he doesn't think I am hiding anything or that I'm a liar... I did make a comment one day that it was difficult dating more than one person- he looked a little surprised but didn't push the subject... Any Advice???

Permalink Reply by Gilbert on January 18, 2010 at 3:40pm

Hi Anna I'm new to this group but I was intrigued enough by this post to answer it. There are a lot of useful advice here and you will never know what works and what doesn't so try them all but one thing I can offer is to start off by saying "Hi" I myself will never be offended if any women on the planet approached me first and say "Hi" whether it be for friendship or a "Date" it never hurts to say Hi. If it goes any further than that you will never know but its ok to say hi first don't be shy the only thing you would have wasted in a few moments of your time, no one is going to kill you for it lol I myself would be happy if an attractive women like you approached me first I find women who are forward as being exciting shy women are nice at first but too shy is a turn off so its ok to step up and say hi and remember if you don't ask you don't get lol. I seen your ad on POF and I would definitely be interested in you because we have lots in common every though of moving to Chicago? Worth a shot LOL.
Gilbert

Permalink Reply by Anna on January 19, 2010 at 8:16am

LOL Thanks Gilbert.