I was reading some of the other discussion topics but I was surprised I didn't see this already addressed. So my question is, what are your deal breakers? 

I have more than a few but some things are negotiable. However there are some absolute deal breakers. 

3. More than one small child. I'm not even sure I can handle one but I know more than one is too much obligation.

2. Neediness (is that a word?). This is usually tied into insecurity on their part. I shouldn't feel obligated to tell him he's a pretty princess everyday.

And number one on the charts is...

Bad Breath! How some people don't find their to the dentist regularly or (gasp) never floss, I'll never understand. 



Tags: breaker, deal, love, relationships

Views: 185

Replies to This Discussion

I'd have to go with ignorance. I'm a person who likes to communicate. I don't see how I could date someone who wasn't interested in learning and experiencing new things.

I also like to travel. I've been in the Navy for most of my adult life(9 years) and know that the biggest reason for doing so is my desire to see new places. I dated a girl in San Diego that told me she has never left California...really? Never? Not even a weekend in Vegas? You'll drive 9 hours to Lake Tahoe or San Fransisco but a 5 hours trip to Las Vegas is too much of a burden?

People who hate to travel I can only assume(barring financial reasons of course) are Xenophobic or simply too accustomed to their bubble of comfort to try new experiences.

So being with someone who doesn't learn anything new and doesn't travel...what would we talk about? I could only handle so many conversations about "what happened at work".

If I had to pick a third I say that she'd have to consider herself a feminist. I not expecting her to go to rallies or stop wearing a bra, but I want her to believe that she can aspire to anything she wants. She must believe the only thing keeping her from getting what she wants is a lack of effort on her part.

It also wouldn't hurt if she liked to read since that is a huge part of my life. I must have a book with me at all times. This is not a joke. Yes I've brought one to the beach, yes I've read at a bar...etc etc etc
Noah: MARRY ME! OK, it's too soon for that. And I'm sure that I'm WAAAAAY out of your age range (56). Still, I love the way you think. I've done my fair share of traveling. The most amazing (and potentially dangerous) trip I ever took was to Israel--during a bombing! That was back in '96. Wow! Talk about "culture shock!" I've also X-country skied in Banff, Canada, taken a cruise along the Pacific side of Mexico, and spent two FABULOUS weeks in Costa Rica.

As to being a feminist...I've never thought of myself that way, but looking back I can see that I must be. I've always worked in male-dominated jobs. I didn't ask their permission, I just kind of barged in and said "I'm a damn good worker and you're a jackass if you don't hire me" (OK, maybe not in those words.)

Reading? I usually have two or three books going at the same time--no kidding! There's the night stand book, light reading for falling asleep; the "in my bag" book for carrying around in case I have to wait for some reason; and the ofc book which I read during breaks. My big thing these days is reading Atheist-authored books. Oh, and I'm not just a reader, I'm also a writer. I've written several articles for "American Atheist" mag (with two more forthcoming.)

Sometimes I really feel that I was born at the wrong time.
Deal breakers huh? I'll be honest here and say that if there's really good chemistry at the start then I'm more prone to do more dealing than breaking. The opposite is true if there is no chemistry or worse; bad chemistry. It won't actually matter if a woman has every conceivable quality that I may desire, if we're just not clicking it's not going to happen and I've never been one to try to force it along; that seems so sad and pointless for me at least.

A lot of people over the years have told me to "just give it a chance" and that these women that I don't really get along with will "grow on me" but that's never happened and typically without chemistry I lose all motivation to try; it's like beating a dead horse (let the poor little horsey rest in peace).

I guess there are definately things that I won't deal with, i.e. drug addiction, insanity, bad hygiene, etc. but I typically don't run into women with those issues so I don't know if they're worth mentioning. A big part of knowing what you're capable of "dealing" with is being honest with yourself even if it means some lost opportunites for dating.
Everything you say here is true! I feel exactly the same way. Guess that's why I'm single....lol.
I don't mind being single sometimes though, just being a facebook, and watching how people exploit their own lives on the net is crazy to me. I honestly think i'd hook it up better with international females or ones from California, everyone of them that i have met, we always clicked, and the reason i couldn't be with that person was because they was just studying abroad. For some reason, i just don't get a long with New York women :(.
Well, I think most of mine fit into chemistry, anyway. Someone who smokes will smell nasty and kill my interest, that way. Someone brainless or really religious will annoy me over time (probably about 5 or 10 minutes) and kill my interest. I could work around smoking temporarily, though, if she's trying to quit, for the sake of future potential ... very temporarily.
Oh, dear Bunny, I couldn't agree more! I work in a hwy construction ofc, which is mostly men. Many of them are the hardcore "macho" redneck goons that "gist cain't waiat fer huntin' season so's they kin go kill somp'in." Since we have a no smoking in the ofc policy, they also chew tobacco. Let me say, the unholy stench this creates is NOT to be believed! There have been times when I thought I was truly going to vomit as they stood over my desk. And then the dirty bastards spit their vile cud in MY trashcan. (Yes, I have complained to mngmt, yet it continues.) And please, don't get me started on some men's inability to properly use toilet paper! (Booger eating is also a "deal breaker"!) EEEEEK!
Oh my cod Carol! You have to deal with spit too?? Ugh, just ugh!

I have a sensitive nose, my sense of smell became heightened during my pregnancy and stayed that way. Pretty much any stench is off-putting to me. The breath is the first thing I notice if a man is trying to get close to me. He's leaning in closer to talk to me and I'll get sick if he has a toilet for a mouth. And then he wants me to put MY mouth on his?? No MA'AM!!

Men are can be foul creatures, the evidence is their bathrooms. Before anyone says anything, yes women can be dirty too. I'm ashamed for them but I'm usually not trying to date a woman.
It's not just "spit", it's a thick, foul, brown, gooey drizzle that coats the inside of the trash can. But that's not the worst of it! Many of them carry around an empty glass bottle (like Snapple) and spew this vile bile into the bottle, which they then set right on the table in the meeting room--OR LUNCH ROOM--for all to see!!!!! I'm SO sorry for the graphic description. Let's all just go "Eeeeewwww!" and laugh it off!
(passes out)

YUCK YUCK & TRIPLE YUCK!!!

Carol, you have my sympathies!!

Ewww and you know these same men have women/wives. Amazing.

I'm going to go throw up now, excuse me...
Well...one of the men recently got divorced, and another is always whining that he "ain't gettin' any from the ol' lady." Gee...I wonder why?
I dunno, is he old enough for men-on-pause to be an issue with his wife, or is it just that he's too disgusting to want to be close to?

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