Hello everyone,
I moved from France 2 years ago to US, Atlanta Georgia. In my 30's, busy with my research scientist job, I decided to date online (gotta be modern)
Well, contrary to France, I never had date that last because of religion matters...either I found lunatic ladies who believes that all bad things that happened in the world is just a way to see God, or Pretty ladies who tried to get me christian or worst, ladies who believed I worshiped the Devil.
I did a virtual experiment, changing my status one line from atheist to christian then more ladies contacting me ...So question, is it harder for an atheist male to find normal date then atheist ladies ? I can't do the reverse experiment !
Thanks for your contribution to the debate and happy New year !
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Permalink Reply by Katie Ranting Redhead Smith on January 25, 2011 at 2:53pm Actually....it's a MUCH more difficult situation than most atheists give it credit for.
Atheism is "easy" for those of us who grew up in decently secular communities and/or families. In a LOT of places, church is basically THE social center in town. That's where everyone meets and that's who organizes all social events. If you don't go to church you have NO social life and coming out of the closet as an atheist or a homosexual could mean completely erasing her social life and as much as a lot of us want to pretend we're all badasses that could stand up to an entire community of judgmental asswipes, very few of us have any idea what it means to be completely socially isolated. It's a harder thing to endure than most people could ever possibly imagine.
Even with all that said, there are things you can learn from the Bible and from "preaching." I know a lot of us like to focus on what's fucked up about the Bible, but there are some nice stories in there as well as some entertaining ones. Maybe she's lucky enough to go to a church that focuses on the positive?
Permalink Reply by Joseph P on January 25, 2011 at 8:51pm I dunno about that. I'm an introvert. I would rather go completely hermit than surround myself with people I couldn't stand and who didn't accept me. I realize not everyone has that kind of social independence, though.
It's not that I'm a bad ass. I'm just that lame.
Oh certainly, there's tons of interesting stuff in the Bible. Like I just mentioned in my previous post, I loved Joseph Heller's take on King David. Good story, even unsatirized. I'm thinking about taking an apologetics class soon, actually ... although admittedly, that's for less than appreciation of the subject material.
I just can't imagine actually going to church on a weekly basis, like she does. I did, while I had no say in the matter, but as soon as I turned 18, I was done. And no, her church isn't the focus-on-the-positive type. Interesting thought you had, but judging by the stories I've heard from her, I don't think so. As near as I can tell, she's just there because of familial obligation.
Permalink Reply by Katie Ranting Redhead Smith on January 25, 2011 at 10:22pm You only say that only having never been in a desperately isolated situation.
As far as familial obligation, I can understand that too. I haven't come out to my family, and if I did, my parents would be mad, but would get over it. My 96 year old grandma....it might put her in her grave. My other grandma who converted to Catholicism for my grandpa's sake would probably be pissed too.....
Oh well, I'm sure it sucks to be her kinda.
Permalink Reply by Joseph P on January 25, 2011 at 10:46pm I dunno. I was for about a year, in my early 20's. It was mostly self-inflicted, though. I needed some me time.
Yeah, I had the advantage of being tactless and 14. That got it out in the open without too much stress or time for contemplating consequences.
Permalink Reply by Jean-Philippe on January 25, 2011 at 4:30pm Funny, I know people who are atheist and bi but who go to church then justify their sexuality on David and Jonathan story of the Bible.Sexuality and Religion, a big issue !
I went to a Black baptist church but when I heard not to go to club, not to drink ...music was good regardless of lyrics !
Permalink Reply by Joseph P on January 25, 2011 at 8:38pm
Permalink Reply by Katie Ranting Redhead Smith on January 25, 2011 at 10:25pm Well, I think women are allowed to be gay according to the Bible. It says things about wasting seeds and lying with another man, but....I don't think it says no girl on girl action.....I could be wrong.
Gospel music kicks ass, I don't care what it says! All that vocal power and enerty transcends faith, or lack of faith. Hell, I listen to and enjoy music in other languages that I don't even understand because it sounds awesome and I even like songs that have lyrics that offend me terribly. What's the difference?
Permalink Reply by Katie Ranting Redhead Smith on January 25, 2011 at 10:25pm
Permalink Reply by Joseph P on January 25, 2011 at 10:47pm
Permalink Reply by Joseph P on January 25, 2011 at 10:56pm I mention this in one of the segments of my standup routine. The only part that mentions anything about women is Romans 1:24-27:
24 Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another. 25 They exchanged the truth about God for a lie, and worshiped and served created things rather than the Creator—who is forever praised. Amen.
26 Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural sexual relations for unnatural ones. 27 In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed shameful acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their error.
Fundies will take this passage to mean lesbianism, but it doesn't specify. It could mean they started having sex with the livestock. Given that lesbianism isn't mentioned anywhere else in the Bible, I see no reason to accept that this passage could mean that, when it doesn't even say it.
I dunno, Gospel music just doesn't do anything for me musically, either. It's not very complex, musically, compared to most of the stuff I listen to, and the chord progressions are way too annoyingly upbeat, for my tastes. There are some Catholic hymns that are pretty good, though.
Permalink Reply by Katie Ranting Redhead Smith on January 25, 2011 at 2:56pm
Permalink Reply by Jean-Philippe on January 25, 2011 at 3:55pm I like it Katie ! From Pagan religions in the Middle East/Egypt/Greece, the 3 major monotheisms were born. Christianity was accepted in Europe for political reasons, sweeping out old European Pagan religions. In the so-called middle age, Christians Priests tortured and killed. Thou shall not kill ...except to promote the Bible ! Then it was Africa and Americas' turn...Same thing happened for Islam in South-India, Iran-Iraq, Indonesia...How funny and sad to see that the last conquered are the most fanatic, regardless of the type of monotheism, contrasting with the beauty of arts, painting, music that had emerged from them ! Gospel, Bach, Cathedral buildings are nice but so much blood shed from Religion.
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