As I mentioned in my first reply, I appreciated the advice. I've never joined an on-line dating site, and truly didn't think of a full-body picture. But as far as the specific weight of any girl, some advice... never expect a woman to post that on their profile.
It sends out a message that physical appearance is the most important aspect, and also can make women uncomfortable. Whether 105 or 305, I've never met a woman who wanted to discuss her weight.
I do understand though, it would be rather unpleasant to meet someone in person and find out they are not at all what you envisioned.
Well, of course.
Otherwise I would have said I understood... but it's not like I go about asking men how tall they are, because if I date someone between 5'9" and 5'11", around 200lbs it reminds me of my father.
I think there are more tactful ways to go about it, and being observant is a good indicator as well. If all her pictures are of just her face, it might have something to do with an insecurity.
Or some advice, talk to her... ask her about her short-comings, and mention your own insecurities. She's more likely to be honest if she doesn't feel so judged, make since?
But if you ever do get roped into going on a date, only to make that discovery... I'd hope you'd be a gentleman, finish the date. And either A.) you'll like her enough to think it doesn't matter, or B.) you'll have other criteria to break it off with her.
A simple 'it's not going to work' is better than treading on her self-esteem. I'm definitely not trying to make you feel shallow. We are all in the same boat there, it's just some handle the situations more gracefully.
I can be very socially awkward, so sensitivity is a skill I had to force myself to adapt, it seems you might be the same in that case.
Hello, Laura, good to make your acquaintance.
Pardon for jumping in here, but I feel impelled to point out that, while it may be considered impolite to ask a woman what she weighs, women seem to have absolutely no such compunctions about asking about a man's height. AND rejecting him on the basis of the answer. I am quite a bit taller than Michael P, and yet I regularly get quizzed on my height, and openly turned down when I don't meet her [often unrealistic] criteria. Consequently, I can see some justification for men thinking that turnabout is fair play. If she's going to go around telling guys "sorry, you're too short", then it's not entirely unreasonable that some of the men might decide that it's OK to say to women, "sorry, you're too fat".
And yes, I know all about social norms, and I'm certainly aware that this isn't a smart thing to do. I'm just saying that there is a definite imbalance here, and I can see where some resentment might arise because of it.
I'm glad you don't ask about height. But most aren't as considerate.
I've seen several girls who don't want to date guys over 5'6" or so, on personals sites. They're short (4'10" or 5' or so), and they don't want anyone who's too much taller. There are all sorts out there.
I'm about 6'1", yes. Not really tall, but slightly above average.
I'm trivializing the issue because it had nothing to do with what we were talking about previously. If Michael Pianko only wants to date women who are shaped like Barbie dolls, that's his right. Likewise, if women only want to date tall men, I'm not going to tell them they can't.
What we were jumping all over him for was that he was using just about the most insulting words possible to describe his preference.
What are the odds that a sweet, intelligent and articulate woman reads really bad books?
Is she reading them ironically?
Joseph is right, 6'1" isn't all that tall anymore, it's pretty average actually. (but maybe this is because out of my 4 closest friends- 2 are girls and are 5'8 and 5'10. 2 are guys and stand at 6'5, and 6'5 1/2. All but one were childhood friends and short when I met them... I still haven't come to terms wit the fact my best and closest friend is 10 inches taller. lol, I still think I can beat him at everything)
I have to agree... because chances are, if they list the Bible as a favorite, they've never read it. And if they list twilight... they've most likely never read another book in their life. Surely the horrid writing is obvious to any literate would-be fans?