Atheists, Addictions, 12 Step Recovery, and Alternatives

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Comment by Ian Mason 1 day ago

Hi Matt

That's a hard one. It can take a long time, building a new kind of life. I don't know that I've done it yet. One of the things I am involved in is support and advice for families of psychiatric patients. I've suffered from depression for years and my daughter had a run-in with anorexia in her early teens so I've some experience. And of course, when you help others you also help yourself. Other things: regular exercise, work, hobbies ( I collect tea-pots and knives), writing poetry. None of them very social, however, which might be what you're looking for. I've also attended adult education classes and the like, which have been fine but I've neglected the social contact made there. A typical depression symptom, so that might not happen for you.

It's a process of trial and error I think. Work out what you like doing and go places where other people do it. And don't be hard on yourself if things don't work the first time.

Is this of any relevance?

Comment by Matt on February 6, 2010 at 10:18pm

Hi guys. I'm as disinclined to enter a bar as much as a church, but find that both these leaves me feeling isolated and frankly, at age 50, just waiting for the clock to run down. How can I find what there is for me?

Comment by maxdaemian on December 8, 2009 at 2:07pm

Hello All, Im very happy to have found this group, I've belonged to the Nexus for over a year and only just realized this group was here. Due to the nature of my job, I travel a a lot and am often unable to go to meeting or interact with other recovering addicts let alone those who are atheists. I've been having a difficult time lately with my recovery and have been away from home for quite awhile and I just wanted to express my appreciation for all of the people who belong to this group and have contributed to it. You have all helped me with your stories and comments. Anyone who would ever like to talk about recovery or atheism or anything for that matter, feel free to message me and thanks again. -maxdaemian

Comment by Curtis Edward Clark on November 19, 2009 at 3:43pm

Well, Luke, it obviously it not "official", yet, and may never be, but the current crop of "trusted servants" who are running the show in New York obviously understand the need to be open even to those who don't believe in God. In an article published in the GSO publication "box 459" just this year, they told about a man who uses a GI Joe doll as his "higher power", and they were not making fun of him.

I would stop holding a resentment toward the prejudices of Bill and Bob, and start understanding that our trusted servants are actually serving everyone now. How do you explain the "official recognition" of my group with a registration number? How do you explain that at the East Central Forum put on the GSO in my home town last weekend that I was not accosted by anyone when I got up to the open mic and declared that my homegroup was called "Atheists and Spirituality"?

AA is a different game now. Perhaps that has not filtered through the consciousness of all the groups, and it probably never will. There is a local group here that has their own official t-shirts and a "god quote" from the Big Book is bigger than life on the back of the shirts. THAT upset someone who went to the open mic, but the admission of my group didn't rile anyone; at least, not anyone who was willing to say it to my face.

Comment by Luke on November 18, 2009 at 10:57pm

Curtis:
Your message to the group said:
By the way, AA has no problem with atheists. I started a home group in my town, and the New York office (GSO) gave it an official registration number. The title of the current Gravevine, if you have not seen it, is "Always Inclusive, Never Exclusive."

I really don't see how a group who insists that all members must accept and make requests of a "Higher Power" is fully accepting of an atheist. They require a change that I cannot make. How can I be an atheist who believes in a Higher Power who answers requests for assistance? This would like being a fundamentalist christian who doesn't believe in gods.

Please explain.

Comment by Pete Soderman on November 18, 2009 at 10:10pm

Curtis, if I thought there was anything of value in AA for me I would have started an atheist AA group here, but there just isn't. I much prefer the SMART format, and it's based upon good science that works, rather then magic. Face it, no one who truly understands how they are abstaining needs to continue meetings for the rest of their life. Once you have the tools to dispute your irrational thinking, they rapidly become a part of your life, and you can move on. The only thing in AA I consider of value is the tenth step, as the big book describes it. If properly understood, it puts you in the moment, constantly aware of your thoughts, actions and beliefs as well as your interactions with others. Zen, of course, will put you int he same place, and faster 'cause that's what meditation is designed to do.

I'm aware that there are many "secular" AA groups across the country and perhaps the world, but I simply don't see the need for all the baggage AA brings with it. The fellowship is certainly a positive thing, but that can be obtained elsewhere, in Humanist groups, etc.. I'm not knocking what you're doing, just saying it's not for me.

Comment by Curtis Edward Clark on November 18, 2009 at 3:40pm

Pete. I started an atheist AA group in my hometown, and the GSO in NY gave it an official registration number. The title of the Gravevine this month is "Always Inclusive, Never Exclusive." They really mean it. And most people here in Kalamazoo accept me and tell me they appreciate my comments on being atheist in AA. http://groups.google.com/group/atheist-aa is the web address of my atheist AA Google group.

Comment by Pete Soderman on July 13, 2009 at 6:57pm

Hi, I'm new to Atheistnexus, but not to atheism or recovery. Quit drinking in '90 in AA, not doing the program (sorry, just couldn't make the leap), but enjoying the fellowship part. Finally, about five years ago I really had enough with the overt religiosity in this area of the country permeating the meetings and started looking for a secular recovery organization that made sense.

A couple of years ago, I found SMART, and started a meeting here in Wilmington, NC. It is doing fine, and so am I. My feeling is that if someone truly wants to quit, almost anything will work. If the individual does not want to quit, nothing will. Motivation is key. Take care.

http://smartrecovery.org/

Comment by Wendi on June 10, 2009 at 4:31pm

Nice link, Dr. Ned - I took the quiz and got 80%...but then I already knew I was an alkie. ;-) Thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster that I haven't had a cocktail in nearly a year!

Comment by Preston on June 8, 2009 at 2:24am

I have been a substance abuse and addictions counselor for over twenty years. I am always looking for support for clients who are nontheists.

Preston

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