The World’s Largest Coalition of Nontheists and Nontheist Communities!

"What if you're wrong?"

I don't know about other Atheists, but I get this question a lot when people find out I don't believe. I know Richard Dawkins has gotten it a number of times and I usually answer the same as he did, which is to turn the question back on the asker, what if they're wrong about Zeus, or Odin, or the Great Juju on the Mountain?

Anyway, I've also gotten the expanded version which is, "What if you're wrong and you die and meet God?" To which I usually reply, "Then God's going to have a damn lot of explaining to do."
But the other day I was thinking about this question and I thought, why be so serious about it?

So take the question, what if you're wrong and you die and there is a god... what do you do?

To get the ball rolling, I'll give you the silly answer that inspired me to write this discussion:

I'd ask god exactly where Felch* lives and to let me go there and fuck with his cynical thinking, because let's face it, if almost any major religion is right, then god is just the sort of prick who would let me do it!

*@Felch (or whatever the fuck weird symbols you're using this week), you know you're my absolute favorite Grogan, right?? :-)

Tags: Felch, God, Wrong, silly, wishes

0 members like this

Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by linda wagner on July 24, 2010 at 7:18am

I would also ask him why he's such a prick and why the secrecy.

Permalink Reply by Pirate Bard on July 24, 2010 at 2:49pm

People seem to be missing the point here. The point of the post is not serious answers to that stupid question, but rather, silly answers to the hypothetical "what if there is an afterlife of some kind. What kind of spirited (pun intended) antics would you get up to?"

Permalink Reply by WiggidyGirl on July 24, 2010 at 7:24pm

At least we wouldn't be lonely in hell

Permalink Reply by Beth Baughman on July 24, 2010 at 10:09pm

What if I'm wrong? Then Yahweh and Allah will have to decide whose hell I get to go to for being an infidel.

Permalink Reply by Billy Clutch on July 24, 2010 at 10:52pm

You forgot Jehovah. Did I spell it right? Besides, both or all three of their hells are brutal! Bring a 100 trillion btu air-conditioner! Or more.

Permalink Reply by Beth Baughman on August 20, 2010 at 7:08am

I thought of something else. If I die and meet God, then what Christians have claimed about me for years will finally be true: I will hate God (for not giving me any reason to believe he exists).

Permalink Reply by Nathan Hevenstone on July 25, 2010 at 1:21am

"Seriously God... why'd you kill Hendrix, Morrison, Roads, and Vaughan? Why do you always kill good musicians and let the horrid ones live on?

Also, seriously... what the hell were thinking being all not there n' shit? I think the world could have used an intervention.

And a book? Seriously? You're all-powerful, and all you could think of was a damn book? That's just... lame."

Permalink Reply by Rob van Senten on July 25, 2010 at 4:56am

"what if you're wrong and you die and there is a god... what do you do?"

I think I'll help god create a better marketing plan.

Permalink Reply by Kelly M on August 16, 2010 at 4:34pm

I was going to say that I would say to god that he really should fire his promoters! I mean honestly, who would believe these assholes???

Permalink Reply by Pat on July 25, 2010 at 8:17pm

OK, God, Adonai, Lord, or whatever alias you're going by today. Mind explaining to me why you were out screwing around, and let Betty Jean (Yeah, the red head with the big rack and tight ass) show up late to the party after I got drunk and left? I heard she was looking for me that night. But NOOOOOOOOO! Couldn't keep me there, could you? You were out making sure some overpaid MLB pitcher wearing a cross was working on a no-hitter. Next time you want to become incarnate flesh, I hope the Holy Poltergiest scores with her first. Serve your useless ass right!!!

Permalink Reply by Ken Winters on July 26, 2010 at 9:22pm

"what if you're wrong and you die and there is a god... what do you do?"

I'd ask him/her/them/it some questions:
"Where the hell have you been? I spent almost half my life trying to find you and never heard a peep!"
Me: "Why didn't you write?" God: "I gave you the Bible." Me: "Let me rephrase that, why didn't you write something that wasn't self-contradictory, didn't have 50,000 different interpretations and didn't conflict with clear evidence?"

Permalink Reply by Jack Matirko on July 26, 2010 at 11:14pm