Expressing Anger Fully

“Nonviolent Communication” Excerpts and Notes:

Author: Marshall B Rosenberg





Anger is a wake up call to my needs:

...


What am I needing and not getting?





Hearing a Difficult Message:



Unproductive to getting our needs met:



1. blame ourselves

2. blame others



More likely to get our needs met:



3. sense our own feelin...gs and needs

4. sense others’ feelings and needs





Expressing Anger:



1. Stop. Breathe.

2. Identify my judgmental thoughts.



… distinguish stimulus from cause…



3. Connect with my needs.

4. Express my feelings and unmet needs.



… “I feel angry because I need …”



Reflect Empathically:



1. observing

2. feeling

3. needing

4. requesting



Listen to what people are needing rather than what they are thinking





Anger emerges from:



• judgments

• labels

• thoughts of blame

• should / have to

• believing that someone deserves something



Practice translating each judgment into an unmet need





"Our objective is to establish relationships based on Honesty and Empathy"