I don't know if this is worthy of a whole discussion but I was thinking of going to some couple therapy soon, but the thought crossed my mind that perhaps my godlessness and passion for atheism would be brought up. My boyfriend is a theist so it does seem likely, especially since it does create some issues. Perhaps it's just an odd thought, but would that maybe turn the therapist against me in some way? I would hope not, but I do live in Texas after all. Seems a bit silly to worry about but I admit I am a bit uncomfortable with the thought of discussing that in that situation. We can be seen as immoral or unfeeling or a number of other things. Is this worry a valid concern or am I being silly? I don't want to pay and have things all twisted up and biased. Not sure how to think about/proceed with this.

Tags: coming, counseling, out, therapy

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Only your therapist. If your beliefs are an issue, it's time to find another therapist.
I'm know if they were to openly say something to find a new one, but I'm mostly afraid it will be a more subtle bias. Like just a general maybe attitude they would have that may interfere with their judgement. I don't know, maybe I'm just a worrier.
Well, unlike theists who endlessly prattle on about "persecution" and "war" against them, you actually do have grounds to be concerned.
Very true. I'm sure it'll b ok and if not I should get an idea something is off. Thanks everyone:)
I would imagine that a therapist would understand the illogics of theism. They are taught in school why people are crazy, why we think the way we do. The subject of religion comes up many times during the class. They have probably treated more people acting insane because of religious events than atheists. They are not there to judge or turn on you anyway, they want to help you talk about your problems and find common ground or help you two understand why you feel the way you do.

To be honest, I was almost in your looming situation and I had the same questions. I know how you feel.
I'm no expert, but my understanding is that honesty and openness is a basic fundamental prerequisite in any relationship and any decent therapist will require that everything be out on the table up front. Keeping your atheism a secret is the best way to doom your relationship to failure.

It may be that your partner or therapist are prejudiced against atheism. If it's the therapist, pick a new one. If your boyfriend has a problem with your atheism, well then the therapy needs to fix that problem. If your boyfriend can't come to terms with your atheism, then it's probably best to pick one of the young hot studs on atheist nexus to take his place.

Jason
Hi SkeptiKat:

I'm a psychology student and started a web site about creativity and psychology. I just happened to do a bit of research that addresses your concerns. Please check it out and I hope that it helps.

Just scroll down until you see the headline Ethics.

http://www.creativityandconflict.com/Ethics.html

Thanks,

Stacey
The problem with Bias is people don't realize when they are making being biased. He may view your Atheism as a clinical problem. Use the common view point that you are "angry with god", and that is why you are an Atheist. There are circumstances in which he would be right too. The big problem is he could move in that direction, and you wouldn't know. He wouldn't let you know that is what he thought.

Well, it is still best to be honest, but I would start with "i don't believe in any religion" before going to "I don't believe in God". Going that way sometimes can show an individual how it was reasoned decision not an emotional one.
I have been to therapy a few times. I went to therapy for sexual abuse/incest and marriage counseling. I didn't mention my atheism because it wasn't why I was there. The counselors (there were various ones) all brought up religion and prayer!!! (what a hair pulling, teeth griting moment) I/ we were told that not attending church, discussing god, praying together (quote to my husband and I "a family that prays together, stays together"), and not recognizing god's will for the man as the firm head of household was the reason for the tensions. Another therapist told me that I should deeply consider turning to god for healing because only he could heal my heart from years of sexual torture from my father. I did professionaly, but firmly let her know that my heart was beating just fine that if she was uncomfortable with her job I would let tricare know; she shouldn't be a military treatment provider and pawn her work off on god.


Now, more recently I spoke with a therapist as a V.A. requirement. I was thrilled to death when I let her know at the front of the appointment that if any mention of god, his will, his love, or me needing to pray come up I will end the meeting and send in the survey. I know some may say I should have allowed it, if it was going to happen, then address it. As someone who has been to as many therapists and does public speaking where god is always thrown in my face as a means of healing---I'm just tired of hearing it and don't want my time wasted. Anyways, she thanked me for my up front and honest personality, and told me briefly how she does not understand how someone can hear the things they hear as therapists/counselors and think there is any gods out there.

So, from my perspective it depends on who you go to. If you have concerns then perhaps it would be revealing to just call the office without identifying yourself (if that's a concern) and ask if their counseling is religious based in any way. Afterall, most xtian counselors are quite proud of pawning their work load off on god. I hope all goes well for you.

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