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Permalink Reply by Jay on August 2, 2009 at 6:52pm

I'd like to call the need to have the feeling to be "manly", prideful/arrogant, and perhaps picks fight for no reason or for no good reason, LPS

(Little Penis Syndrome)

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Permalink Reply by Jay on August 2, 2009 at 10:23pm

Take note, LPS is only truly visible when the patient is drunk. If he picks a fight, he has LPS. :P

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Permalink Reply by Jezzy on August 2, 2009 at 11:20pm

Feminized? You mean emasculation?

Personally, I'm not seeing where you're feeling threatened. Sexual androgyny doesn't need to be such a bad thing. Barrel-chested men who eat rare beef for breakfast and sling half-naked barmaids over their shoulder as they pump out 94 push-ups... don't have much of a place in modern society. It's like insulting women who don't faint at the sight of a mouse, or play mind games with their suitors. Impractical, unnecessary... de-evolutionizing. Yeah, I made that word up.

So it's no secret the theories of men and women and their respective roles in ye very olde days. Men would go fight dinosaurs and bring their delicious meaty pelts to roast on the barbie, while the womenfolk took care of the men and had kinky caveman sex, maybe watched General Hospital or vacuumed the cave a little... and did not much else. Men are, like robots, programmed to have sex with as many cavewomen as possible, whereas women want only one male, who will be a good provider for her and her puppies, yet she would always be on the lookout for someone who was stronger or better. Nowadays some of this is still true and some of it isn't. We've clearly hunted the delicious, tender dinosaurs to extinction so we had to invent the chicken. But more than that, women don't need protectors from anything but other men, and possibly mechanized swinging blades in the house of horrors. We don't need to worry about making some quick babies before we get struck by a meteorite or eaten by a giant sea serpent. I'd like to think the selection of a mate is more logical. It can still be shallow-- for example, money replaces strength. But women aren't generally attracted to hulking barbarians, and they're of very little use in general. Expecting a man to be fearless or strong just reinforces boundaries and stereotypes.

Every time I hear a guy say that someone needs to "grow some balls" they're generally just being apathetic and refusing to show any signs of empathy or thought. It's repressing progress, and it's a sexist statement to begin with. I don't have male genitalia, and I don't want it. And I don't want anybody perpetrating the idea that male genitalia makes a person stronger or better. It's meant as a casual joke, but it's a clear representation of how far we haven't come.

I don't think you really mean masculinity as in V-shaped beer-guzzlers. Since you mention "perpetual boyhood", I'd assume you're simply referring to the modern male's refusal to grow up? Immaturity, perhaps? Something I would definitely agree with, considering all of the new male comedies revolving around sex, farts, and other bodily functions, and the disturbing amount of money they make. I don't see how "From the makers of Superbad" is supposed to make me want to see anything but my own slow death.

This is a very strange generation to me... Usually increased sexuality in women accompanies a feminist period where there's little makeup and a lot of new ideas... but mostly it just seems to be sexuality. I think it's a little childish and frankly, dangerous to play with sex as a means of asserting one's equality. Every women's magazine on Earth, however, seems to think it's vogue to talk about sex as much as possible. In one light it could be seen as revolutionary or mature, yet it's more often just disturbing. You never hear about what "men" are up to, men are seen as default-- when from a biological standpoint, women are. In history you hear "women of this era were..." but they don't talk about men much. It's kind of disappointing. Are men not as prone to trends or revolutions of personality? How should I know? I'm not one. I always wonder what men in the 1920s thought about those "absurd" flappers and their knee-length skirts. It sounds stupid, but why is this never addressed? Boys these days wear skinny jeans and oversized T-shirts, and yes, they look awful... but it's traditionally seen as women who set the fashion standards, so why do men conform, when men aren't "suppose" to care about the clothes on their back? This is just honest curiosity, but sometimes I think the sexes are closer than they care to admit... I am very confused by men/women, even for a teenager. D: Woe is me.

Admittedly, that was all over the place and kind of veered off topic a few times, but if you read it, that was all your own fault. :)

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Permalink Reply by mthoreau on August 4, 2009 at 6:23pm

Well, looks like I started a vaguely defined thread topic and I got what I paid for. Ok, time for some clarification. I'm not looking for any kind of affirmation of my masculinity or anything like that. My intention was to start a discussion on the contemporary definition or gender roles and their consequences. I have noticed a disturbing trend in both media as well as the university that portrays men as lazy, stupid, and destructive. Indeed, such sentiments are on the cutting edge of modern feminism. However, it isn't just a few musky old estrogen mongers who are responsible for this.

Observe.

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Also on the cutting edge, is the belief that all gender roles and norms are the result of an elaborate socialization which is entirely artificial and can be shaped to produce one set of expectations as easily as any other.


Here's an article on this school of thought.
href="http://community.feministing.com/2009/04/the-social-construct...
and the science that contradicts it.
href="http://www.cerebromente.org.br/n11/mente/eisntein/cerebro-hom...

First of all, I think it's very interesting how many men leaped at the chance to defend feminism and the constructivist model of gender roles. For instance, blaming the travails and cataclysms of human history on testosterone is a good way to establish ones self as a non-sexist in the same way that introducing you black friend in a public setting is a good way to establish credibility as a non-racist (it isn't). While I do not intend on bashing feminism (I help to organize and promote my campus's Take Back The Night Rally every year) I do feel that branches of it has morphed into a culturally harmful cartoon of its self and very little is being done to counter it.

What erks me, isn't the angry female zealots who are in need of a good shag. It's the spineless men who internalize and advocate these values so that they may think of themselves as having transcended yet another form of social ignorance. REASON is the only road out of ignorance, not the sacrifice of your own dignity on the alter of reactionary egalitarianism <-not necessarily an oxymoron.

The result is a generation of males who have no standard of behavior worth rebelling against or emulating. The result is a prolonged adolescence and arrested development.

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Permalink Reply by Jezzy on August 4, 2009 at 9:53pm

I have noticed a disturbing trend in both media as well as the university that portrays men as lazy, stupid, and destructive.

I agree. It works both ways, with stupid, shallow men and angry, sex starved women in movies and magazines. I feel like the media replicates society and society replicates the media... and we all end up very confused. Every other commercial is an ad for a food or product that will make you smarter or make women sleep with you, or both. Comedy Central ads are mostly alcohol-based. Ironically, the other half are car insurance ads. For women, there's weight loss products, cosmetics, and Wal-Mart. They tend to be based almost solely on aesthetics and emotion. It's not nearly as insulting as the media's interpretation of a man, but it plays on the old idea that for example, a woman buys a car only based on the color (aesthetics) and the feel of it (emotion). Unfortunately, I'm stuck with an unbearable dial-up connection and watching that 30 second ad you posted would take about an hour.

While I'm apparently "over-feminist", I think that the feminists who represent us are insane, and it's unfair that men aren't able to defend themselves in the same way. For example, the no cross-dressing rule at my school ensures that no more boys pose as Cheerleaders at Halloween. (We weren't complaining!!) It's taboo for a man to do many of the things that women do, yet for women it's a matter of "equality". Well, it doesn't sound equal. I wish there were a better word for feminism that would allow us to address both genders. How ironic that we've made equality all about women... The same applies to races. It's "reverse" discrimination when a white person is profiled. Wha?

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Permalink Reply by LarissaFae on August 6, 2009 at 1:43am

It's "reverse" discrimination when a white person is profiled.

Ooooh, that really irritates me. No, it's plain racist. Racism is not a disease that only afflicts white people. It affects everybody. I'm sorry my ancestors were dicks - I'm not for the enslavement or second-class status of anyone (except maybe my younger brother, but I'm more for renting him out than anything else ^_^). I'm sorry I was born a middle-class white chick - but no, really, that's not my fault. What can I do to make things better? I'll step in where I see racism happening and tell the shit-head to shut up. I'll support equal rights for everyone, I'll try to be sensitive to cultural/racial differences (like not yelling out to my equally-white friends, "What up ma n****r?!"), and I'll treat everybody with respect.

But when someone turns around and uses that AGAINST me? "Oh, you won't discount my meal because I'm black!" Uhm, no, I won't discount your meal because you kept telling me, your waitress, that everything was fine and the food was great, and only complained and wanted a discount after you'd eaten it all. If that white couple behind you pulls the same thing, I won't discount their meal, either. I'm an equal-opportunity scam-slammer. "We only want a black waitress." I'm sorry, Michelle's section is over there and, as you can see, full. You're stuck with the white chick. I'll try to not let the pasty bleach in my skin seep into your food.

I hate it when people jump all over race at the slightest hint. Like that black professor that was arrested recently. His door jammed and he had to break into his own home. Oaky, fine, the police responded, as they should have. Instead of saying, "Oh, good, you showed up, thank you! Look, I live here, my door jammed, please, take a look at my ID and my address on it, and let me tell you where some other documentation in the house is, to prove that I'm me", he refused to show them any ID, became belligerent, and went off about how they were arresting him because he was black. No, they weren't arresting him because he was black. They were arresting him because he was breaking into a home that he refused to verify was his, and got abusive toward the officers involved.

Ugh.

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Permalink Reply by Jezzy on August 6, 2009 at 2:39am

I heard that he showed them ID, but I also heard that he wasn't exactly cooperative. I'm not really sure either way, I avoid any news that isn't being presented to me at Comedy Central.

I hate that. The population is really, really White here and so whenever I see a Black person, I don't want to do anything that would make them think I'm racist... It doesn't end well because I'm incredibly socially awkward. If this were a more perfect world, I wouldn't have to give it a second thought. But so far, no accusations! Woo!

There are these tests that are supposed to tell you if you have a bias for African Americans or Caucasians... Apparently a lot of the people who were White and were told they had a preference for White people were really ashamed of themselves, whereas Black test-takers were proud of their heritage. It's a completely different culture...

Does being a waitress suck? My cousin got fired for going home with a migraine. Her friend was working with a fever of 102. As if dealing with customers wasn't enough...

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Permalink Reply by LarissaFae on August 6, 2009 at 3:28am

I took a test that measure that, I think. It was something about how well you spotted certain nationalities. The thing was, every time it showed an Asian, black person, white person, etc., and asked "Which one is American?", the white person was the correct choice; it buzzed at you if you chose any other. So, I started clicking the white person, because that was the "right" choice for the test (I think it was some dating site? It was back in 2002), and then it told me that I had a preference for my own race, which was completely untrue. I find Asian and Indian women far more attractive than I find white women, in general. Anyway, my point is, is that the way they indicated "correct" and "incorrect" answers led to an obvious bias. If YOU kept getting slapped on the hand for not taking the chocolate chip cookies, would you continue to go for the peanut butter or sugar cookies? No, you'd learn to go for the chocolate chip. To say that you prefer chocolate chip after that is simply ridiculous.

. . . I didn't realise that test was still bugging me so much. Yeah, it WAS a dating site, because it said that it'd put in my profile that I preferred white chicks, and I was insulted because then the pretty Asian ladies wouldn't contact me.

And yes, being a waitress sucks ass. Over-worked, under-paid . . . For what I put up with as a waitress, I should be getting at LEAST $14/hr. People are NASTY and you will HATE them with a passion. You'll also love them, because they're the greatest things ever.

My waitressing-induced Stockholm Syndrome, let me show you it. ^_^ You get to meet a lot of interesting people, and a lot of complete assholes. Sometimes you have great managers, sometimes they suck. Your cousin shouldn't have gotten fired for a migraine. I mean, if it was a medical migraine, a lay in a pitch-black room with earmuffs on migraine, then no, she shouldn't have. And with a fever of 102, her friend could have been infectious. They could have put themselves and other people in danger, because of their conditions.

Although my favourite sick story is when I was having such horrible stomach pains that I was bent nearly double and shuffling slowly around, grimacing despite trying to smile. I couldn't call in sick because two other people had already called in and no one could take my shift, so they stuck me in the smallest section we had (which was also the closest to the kitchen, thank goodness). I had a 4-top come in and order around $25 worth of food, and leave me something like $45 in cash and walked out after they were done. The thing was, I didn't notice the AMOUNT of cash they'd left until after they'd left, and I could barely walk, much less run out and insist that they not leave me an almost 100% tip. It was wonderfully sweet of them, and I still love them for it. At my last restaurant (I'm not actually a waitress any more), I had a 6-top leave me a 30% tip or so, and also a pink crayon kitty out of our toy machines. It was especially sweet because I had just had an 8-top who left me jack.

Anyway, I firmly believe that people should be required to spend 6 months in retail, 6 months serving, and 2 years in the military immediately out of high school. We would have SUCH better-behaved citizens if THAT happened. Sigh, a gal can dream . . . :)

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Permalink Reply by LarissaFae on August 5, 2009 at 1:09am

My intention was to start a discussion on the contemporary definition or gender roles and their consequences.

So . . . why didn't you say that in the first place? It's an interesting topic (one that I'll have to come back to), but the way you started out just made you sound like a whiny, insecure, misogynistic, wannabe-macho-man.

Think a bit before you post, take some time to formulate your thoughts (like you've done here), and then post. This is the Internet; you have all day to come up with the least-offensive way to say something. Just sayin'. :)

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Permalink Reply by Фелч Гроган on August 5, 2009 at 2:49am

LarissaFae: but the way you started out just made you sound like a whiny, insecure, misogynistic, wannabe-macho-man.

Booya!

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Permalink Reply by mthoreau on August 5, 2009 at 3:53am

I didn't have the time to post a well thought out thread topic, that's why I wrote more on this later. If that means suffering the outrage of Eve Enslers goon squad then so be it.

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Permalink Reply by LarissaFae on August 5, 2009 at 4:21pm

I didn't have the time to post a well thought out thread topic,

It's the Internet, dude. You have time. Leave it for later, jot down a rough outline, whatever. Or simply post, "What are your thoughts on the increasing immaturity and irresponsibility of this generation's men?" Wow. I pulled THAT line out of my ass right now, and it's still less offensive than your post. You may be online, but that's no excuse for being an asshole.

And if you want to compare me to Ms. Ensler, go right ahead. Ms. Ensler has done a lot of work in regards to women's rights as human beings being respected, and speaking out against violence toward women.

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