There's got to be a good, short and sweet response though.
A sort of not exactly rude but, "make them think" response...?
The problem is you can't know the situation of the other—they might be going through terrible difficulties and just have chosen an inappropriate way of reaching out. Your response might seem cruel.
Perhaps the difficulties have in part to do with an existential problem?
"Which one? The one who works for a pittance as a kitchen help at the Golden Wok, or the one who mows my neighbor's lawn for a pittance but compensates by screwing his wife when he isn't home?"
Yeah - let's not forget the pink unicorn - it loves them back - hahaha
Yeah, Jesus LOVES Travis Bickle ... HOOBOY!
that's good Napoleon
How about: I hope he doesn't love me as much as he loves my sister. He loved her so much he let her die an excruciatingly slow and agonizing death from Lou Gehrig's disease just so he could bring her to him in her early 50s instead of letting her live the full live she so richly loved. I don't need that kind of love from Jesus.
Or how about: Jesus loves me? He must not know what I think of him!
Or: "Jesus loves you."
"No, I'm sorry. Jesus doesn't love me, because I don't hate my family as he commanded."
Just say, "Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law."
"Gee, I hope he didn't get the wrong idea. I appreciate his interest, but what works for me is a clean, sane woman. By the way, how do you feel about gay marriage?"
" I'm glad someone does because I don't like you"