What is the best response to "Jesus loves you"?

I live in a very religious town, so I hear this saying about 2 or 3 times every week, whether it be to me or someone near me.  I usually don't respond when it is said to me, but what do you think a good response would be?

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Permalink Reply by Loren Miller on July 15, 2012 at 11:57am

Believers' yap about their savior working through others is one of the biggest dodges I've seen in their playbook, and I'm in complete agreement about demanding a removal of intermediaries.  People can love, aid and support others with no more belief than in that action as a means of "raising all boats."  I frequently help others for no other reason than I LIKE to help others.  Nothing else has anything to do with my action, least of all some insubstantial deity.

If some god wants to express his/her/its appreciation for me, it can do so in person and without all the mumbo-jumbo.  Those acting as putative intermediaries can either give me one hell of a good reason to believe their not just acting on their own behalf or get summarily dismissed.  I have a low tolerance for bullshit, and this is bullshit of the worst sort.

Permalink Reply by Joseph Heston on July 15, 2012 at 2:59pm

The best response: "Whatever".

Permalink Reply by John Aultman on July 15, 2012 at 10:17pm

Ask them to "Ankh if they love Isis"

Permalink Reply by Loren Miller on July 15, 2012 at 10:20pm

And yet another response:

"WHY would I care that some guy who died 2,000 years ago loves me?"

Permalink Reply by Michael OL on July 16, 2012 at 12:00am

A semi-serious response might go like this:  "If Jesus loves me unconditionally, then where is the benefit in becoming a Christian?  If on the other hand the love of Jesus is contingent on my assuming a particular stance, then how can salvation genuinely be a free gift?"

Permalink Reply by Anthony Jones on July 16, 2012 at 1:08am
Hmmm. Good call. I like your logic there.
Permalink Reply by James Boring on July 16, 2012 at 9:27pm

I'm almost positive that the "unconditional" stuff is not in the N.T.

Jesus has a lot of conditions, most of which his followers ignore.

Permalink Reply by Philipp K. on July 16, 2012 at 6:53am

The answer i liked best:

i just wouldn't dare to use it in real life :P

Permalink Reply by Loren Miller on July 16, 2012 at 7:26am

If you gotta react, OVERREACT!  Nothing succeeds like excess!

Permalink Reply by Jim DePaulo on July 16, 2012 at 7:03pm

He told you that? Why on earth would he tell you? Or...are you just a snoopy asshole digging through the magic sky guy's files?

Permalink Reply by L Jordan on July 17, 2012 at 3:49am

Father christmas loves you.

Permalink Reply by James Boring on July 18, 2012 at 4:43pm

My new favorite reply is, "I love Lamp!"

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